


Before You Met Me

by spicykatsudon



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi Keiji is Bad at Feelings, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bokuto Works at a Cafe, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Red String of Fate, mostly fluff tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-22
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:01:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 51,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26921062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spicykatsudon/pseuds/spicykatsudon
Summary: Akaashi wasn't an expert at this kind of stuff. All he knew was that if the red string connected to two people, they are destined to be lovers. Everyone that he met had one, with him being the exception. Seeing this now, meeting someone who doesn't have the thread that determines their fate—It piqued his interest."I don't know if you can tell by now, but I can be a bit of a spaz sometimes," Bokuto laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'll pay for everything, though. How about I give you my number?""Is that a pick up line?"
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 40
Kudos: 205





	Before You Met Me

**Author's Note:**

> after one month of writing, I finally did it!! thank you guys for your patience, I wrote this one especially to comfort the hearts of those broken by the famous In Another Life story :,)
> 
> this is actually the first haikyuu fic I wrote, so I hope you guys enjoy it! 
> 
> happy reading you masochists ♡

_Two people are connected by a red thread, destined to be lovers no matter when or where they are._

_They could be a thousand miles apart, in different time zones of the world. Or, they could have grown up together as childhood best friends, be unknowing of each other's feelings for one another. Be it a man and a woman, a man and a man, or a woman and a woman—_

_The red string connects you to your destined love._

_And Akaashi was tired of it._

Growing up, Akaashi never understood what it meant to fall in love. What kind of benefits does falling in love ever give anyways? Being bounded to one person for the rest of your life, opening yourself up entirely to that one person, having them know all your weaknesses and all your insecurities?

"Heh, imagine that," Akaashi mumbled to himself as a couple who were giggling a little too loudly together pass by him. He sighed, twiddling with the pencil around his thumb as he continued to sketch...something. 

_They're strings aren't even connected to each other,_ Akaashi thought, wondering how that whole relationship will go down. 

Being able to see people's red string of fate is not exactly as pleasant as one might think. Ever since birth, Akaashi was able to see who was meant for who, who will be saved from a heartbreak, and whose heart will be broken. He never intended to use this power for any of his benefit, however, he's already learned what the consequences are from this curse.

In all honesty, he was the reason why many people's had their hearts broken in the first place, due to some careless things he said about not them being meant for each other as a kid.

Just like he did to his parents.

So right now, he preferred to be just an observer of people. 

Akaashi leaned his head back on the bench he was sitting on, staring at the scene of the park before him, the sketch in his hand unfinished. He lost his motivation. 

Maybe it was his lack of sleep ever since he started his first year of college, they always said that art majors never had it easy. But since then, there's been an interruption of creative flow that caused Akaashi to get stump in his works.

His eyes wandered aimlessly as everyone's red string dragged around when they passed by him. 

From birth until now Akaashi, for some apparent reason, was able to see these red strings from _everyone_. Everyone, from the couple that just passed by, his parents' strings that weren't connected together, and even his friend Kenma's string glowing whenever he was with his boyfriend. 

He could see the thread of the red string of fate that is attached to the pinky of everyone he meets.

Almost everyone. Everyone, except for himself.

Akaashi figured it must've been some been some kind of accommodation for his ability to see others' red string. Not that he ever wanted to in the first place anyways. But no matter how many times he tried, he could never see the red color wrapped around his own finger, as if the universe was mocking him that he just...

That he just wasn't meant for anyone. 

Akaashi shook his head, knowing that all these pointless thoughts were getting him nowhere with what he really needed to focus on. He stared at the poor excuse of a drawing he scribbled in his sketchbook, a mix of exhaustion and frustration settled in him. He can feel his energy almost completely depleted. 

He muttered a curse under his breath, stuffing his book back in his schoolbag. 

"One day," Akaashi sighed hopefully, swinging his bag over his shoulder when he stood up. He took one final glance at the scenery before him, an orange sunset with a tint of red and gold splashed across the sky with faded clouds. 

He always loved how the sky illuminated with such beautiful colors. Maybe he could paint that later tonight?

_No, NO,_ Akaashi scolded himself, shaking his head to steer the idea clear out of his head, _I've painted too many sunsets already._

He turned his back to walk his way to his dorm, hesitantly taking one more glance behind him.

_Okay, one more wouldn't hurt._

Accepting another day of an artist's defeat, Akaashi was just about to put his earphones on to listen to some calming music on his walk back.

Right before he realized, he was being pushed onto the ground as a heavy weight took his breath away.

Literally, whoever ran into him was piercing his weight onto his body, making it hard for him to breathe. It wasn't enough to kill him, no, just enough that his vision started to blur slightly.

"Umm," Akaashi coughed, his phone clutched in his hand, "Hey, how long are you gonna stay on me?"

"I AM SO SORRY!" A rushed, loud voice answered, causing Akaashi to wince when the other guy was basically _screaming_ right next to his ear as he rambled on, "Are you okay?? I was running on my way to work, I didn't realize how long I slept in for and then the sunset had so many pretty colors and I got distractedー"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it," Akaashi's eyes were starting to adjust, biting back a snarky comment that he was ready to bluntly reply with, "Can youー" 

He paused, as big, golden eyes were staring right back at his own. Akaashi's eyes widened at the close proximity between his face and the other guy's, worry etching over his features. Akaashi bit the inside of his cheek, and attempted to lean back when he realized that a hand was supporting the back of his head, separating it from meeting the ground.

"I, uhm...I'm alright," Akaashi answered, shifting his eyes to the side to avoid the other's intense gaze.

The guy who was pinning him down let out a relieved sigh, slowly removing his hand away to balance himself more, a smile brushing across his face quicker and wider than Akaashi could comprehend.

"That's great!!" He laughed, while Akaashi ignored the little glint in the other's eyes as he did, "I thought I broke your head there or something."

"Yeah, no, I didn't," Akaashi could only think to answer. _Thanks to you._

Akaashi pursed his lips, tapping at the guy's side softly with his free hand, "Do you mind-?"

"OH! R-Right, right," the guy flustered, lifting himself up with ease, albeit ungracefully. He offered a hand to Akaashi, which he took willingly, and brushed the dust off his pants. 

Now that Akaashi could see in a better light, the way the other guy looked caught him off guard. He was taller than Akaashi, and he could tell just how fit he was with just one look of his broad shoulders. His hair was spiked up in different directions, a silver color with dark, black streaks running through. A quick thought flashed through Akaashi's head, causing him to hold back a snicker by covering his mouth over his hand.

_This guy seriously looked so much like an owl._

"Shit!" He exclaimed, when he caught another glimpse of the time on his watch. He grabbed his hair in his hand as he took small steps to the direction he was running to before he collided with Akaashi, "I-I gotta get going! I'm late for work, but, maybe I'll see you around? See ya!" 

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, holding an awkward hand up in a small wave goodbye as he watch the other run away, waving back. He realized they never really got to exchange names in their short yet interesting encounter, but Akaashi never really paid no mind to it at the time. 

He found himself still staring at the loud, brightly golden eyed guy who crashed into him and caged him to the ground, as he rushed his way to work until his silhouette was lost in the outline of the sunset. He thought of the way the other held his hand out to him, and the kind of cute way he waved goodbye as he ran backwards with both of his hands in the air. That was when Akaashi realized...

"Wait..." He blinked confusingly, "Where's his string?"

* * *

_"Akaashi."_

_Ah, this dream again, huh?_

_Akaashi sat still, showing no efforts in moving from wherever he was. He could feel the familiar cold sand softly cushioning his bottom, not too wet, but not uncomfortable either. The gentle breeze that the ocean across from him gave nipped at his nose, the waves crashing against each other. He looked behind him, a small village not so far away was in his peripheral vision, yet no sign of any other residents in sight._

_"Akaashi!"_

_He took a deep breath in. This particular scenery was not unknown to him, yet it does feel tiring at some times. He threw his head back to look above, not so surprised to see the emptiness of his so called dreamscape._

_"Hey, stop ignoring me!"_

_Akaashi scrunched his nose in slight irritation, looking down at his side, "I don't have anything to say to you."_

_His eyes followed his company as a yellow snake slithered by, calmly wrapping itself around Akaashi's leg. Its head stared right back at him, bright ruby eyes forcing him to make eye contact._

_The snake's tongue flicked at him almost as if it was ridiculing him, asking him those words it tends to mock him with—_

_"Are you even meant for love?"_

"Akaashi, wake up."

Akaashi groaned as he opened his eyes and his face was met with a pillow that was thrown by his one and only roommate and possibly friend, Kenma Kozume. 

The pillow fell to the ground, and Akaashi rubbed the sleepiness from his eyes as he stared out the window. It was almost getting dark.

"What time is it?" Akaashi yawned, feeling the familiar weight on his chest as his sketchbook lay lazily on him. 

Another empty page.

"It's almost six," Kenma answered, pulling out his phone to probably play a quick game or two, "Hurry up and get dressed, remember? You're coming with me to see Kuroo because for some reason he wanted both of us to see him tonight."

Akaashi ruffled his hair in an attempt to regain his energy, barely remembering their promise to Kenma's rooster haired boyfriend. 

_"There's this cool new thing they're trying at the café, and we're trying to get more people to join-"_

_"No," Kenma answered blatantly, not looking away from his video game._

_"Please?" Kuroo pouted, which was ultimately (and secretly) Kenma's weak spot, "Promise me, you will love it!"_

_Kenma furrowed his brows, frowning in an attempt to hide his blush, "Fine."_

_"Hah hah!" Kuroo cheered, poking his elbow at Akaashi, "You too, bro! You gotta come too!"_

_Akaashi turned his head away, debating as he tapped his finger on his knee. He took a glance back to turn Kuroo down, when he saw Kenma's pleading face telling him how much he didn't want to be alone._

_He groaned, turning his stare away from them and back down to his knee, "Okay."_

He didn't really understood why he had to come in particular, but he'll do it for Kenma, the only friend he made ever since he started college. While Kuroo was already a second year, he and Kenma were both first years. Apparently, the two have been best friends since they were kids, and have been dating since Kuroo's last year of high school when he finally confessed to Kenma. 

Akaashi was happy for them of course, seeing how both their red strings seemed to glow brighter whenever he was with Kuroo and vise versa.

_I wonder if my string looks like that...or if I even have a string..._

He shook the negative thoughts out of his head, changing his clothes into something that was more appealing for him to wear at a café. 

"You fashionista," Kenma spoke in a low but teasing voice, not looking away from his game, "Just throw on a hoodie and you'll be fine, it's not like you'll be running into Yuki Kaji in a local café."

Akaashi smirked, staring at himself in the mirror as he threw on a white bucket hat just to spite him. 

"I'm an art major Kenma, its in my veins to look good without trying," He replied back sarcastically.

To be honest, Kenma is probably one of the few people he can talk to like this. A fine line between teasing without getting too much into each other's personal space. Akaashi enjoyed that, knowing he doesn't have to be so wary of himself around someone like this while maintaining his walls at the same time. 

_If this is how it's like with a friend, how is it so different than if it was with a lover? Would it not be the same feeling?_

_Not again,_ Akaashi thought, grabbing his shoes and his phone once he was done. 

Whenever he dreams about that weird snake dream, he falls back into dominoes of queries regarding that irritable string of fate curse he has. The thought of even being in love baffled him. Maybe it was because he never really knew what it felt like to fall in love? His parents weren't really much of a good example when he was a kid, but Kenma and Kuroo were different than that. 

Not that he's one to talk, he never even had a crush on someone before. 

He followed Kenma out of their dorm, lost in his thoughts as Kenma blindly walked in the direction of the café his boyfriend works out, not looking away from his phone. Akaashi didn't mind the silence, and would often shift Kenma just a bit to avoid him from bumping into other people as he walked. 

Akaashi was reminded of the somewhat familiar color of gold flashing through his mind, and a shining, wide smile that almost filled half his face that came when they collided with each other. 

It's been a few days since he saw that owlish looking guy, but he sometimes caught himself thinking about him from time to time.

_Is it because he ran into me that I'm still thinking about him?_ Akaashi wondered, quickly shifting Kenma aside to avoid him walking into a pole. 

_I wonder what he's doing right now?_

* * *

"KUROO YOU BASTARD-!"

"HEY!" Kuroo couldn't help but laugh so loud he had to hug his sides, "I'm just helping you!! I thought you WANTED to see him again-!"

"NOT LIKE THIS!!" 

Bokuto grabbed the shoulders of his messy bed haired friend, shaking him to and fro violently. Kuroo didn't care for it, he was too busy catching his breath, "I'm doing you a favor dude!"

"So just tell me his name!!"

"You gotta ask him yourself! That's the fun of it!"

Bokuto started to feel that familiar heat creeping up his neck, looking away from Kuroo as he took his hands back to cross his arms over his chest with a pout. 

"I told you about that thing a few days ago because I trusted you!! You just like seeing me suffer!" Bokuto sulked, ready to bury his entire soul and body into the depths of hell. Even deeper than hell, just toss him into the River Styx or something that those Greek myths always talked about. 

Now, before he does find a way to throw himself in the deepest pit, the scene that led him to this moment just now ran across his mind. 

It was just a couple days ago. Bokuto came to work sweaty, out of breath, and flushed red across his cheeks.

And it was _not_ only because he ran his ass all the way from his dorm to the café. 

_"Dude!" Kuroo shouted from across the café as Bokuto staggered his way in, passing through the counter, gasping for air._

_"You looked like someone smashed you into next year."_

_"EXCUSE ME," Bokuto huffed, taking off his bag, and pointed a thumb to himself proudly, "I'm the one who does that!"_

_"Says the virgin who is EXUDING bottom energy-"_

_"OI! You two talk too much!!" The two looked back at their coworker, Oikawa, who slung a clean rag over his shoulder acting as if it was a cape, "Now if you wanna talk about bottoms-"_

_Oikawa's input in their conversation was cut short when a hand quickly karate chopped him on the head. He winced in pain, rubbing the spot that was hit when he turned to complain to his attacker._

_"That hurt, Iwa-chan!"_

_"The three of you should be working," Iwaizumi scolded, turning back away from them to his work station. Oikawa, unfazed by his actions, shrugged it off and followed Iwaizumi back to his position, and to bother him at the same time._

_"Now," Kuroo turned his attention back to Bokuto, who was now burying his face in his hands, "What's got you down this time? Wait! Lemme guess...that artist guy you have a crush on?"_

_Bokuto's ears reddened even more at the slight mention of him. He met Kuroo his last year of high school. They go to the same college now, and Kuroo even recruited him for this job a couple weeks ago! They became really close in a span of two years, and he felt like he could tell this idiot anything. But even so..._

_He deeply regrets telling Kuroo about the art guy!_

_"HAHAHAH WAIT, WAIT-" Kuroo laughed, hanging onto the counter for support, "You mean to tell me—you ran into him, had a FULL ON conversation with him, then just left??"_

_"I KNOW-"_

_"You're probably right, maybe you are the one that does the fucking," Kuroo snickered, "You smashed and dashed so quick, you didn't even get his name."_

_"It's not funny!" Bokuto whined, pouting as he felt his head drop at the loss of opportunity. He leaned against the counter, "And he was so hot up close, too."_

_"Mmm, one sec," Kuroo paused for a moment, quickly taking their customer's orders and money, and have Oikawa and Iwaizumi handle it._

_"Tell me, what was he like then?"_

_"Hot," Bokuto blurted out without thinking._

_"I meant what did he look like. I need details, specifics."_

_"Oh," Bokuto blinked, lifting his face up to look up at the cafe's ceiling lights. It was finally starting to get darker outside, the clouds disappearing as it welcomed the night. Bokuto sighed, thinking about his short encounter with the one who was always drawing._

_Or more like...the one who was always struggling what to draw?_

_"Well," Bokuto started, "He was really pretty up close. But, like, it's more than that, bro! I mean, he's got these eyes-"_

_"Everyone has eyes, Bokuto."_

_"Okay, Helen Keller," Bokuto remarked, but continued on, "They were...really blue. Not like super bright blue, more like...it was more intense, y'know? And the way he dressed! He was always dressing so fresh that you would mistake him for a celebrity!"_

_Kuroo narrowed his eyes, his attention a bit more peeked when he heard how familiar these descriptions sounded, "Uh huh..."_

_"He doesn't look like the type to smile a lot. It looked like he had a long day too, I think he was walking back to the dorms after being in the park so long."_

_Now Kuroo was even more invested in this._ _Artist in the park? Intense blue eyes? A style that would go great in a catwalk?_

_Kuroo knows this can't be a coincidence, but what if..._

_"Was there paint splattered on his pant legs or something?"_

_"Paint?" Bokuto looked back at Kuroo, raising a brow up as if he was looking through his memories, "Yeah, I think there was. I thought it was cute! It must be from when he's just painting or something, you know?"_

_As Bokuto looked like he went back to daydreaming about his art crush, Kuroo had some other things planned in mind. Evil things._ _Only to help his friend out, he swears!_

_"Hey, Kuroo?" Bokuto hummed._

_"Yeah?"_

_Kuroo looked back at Bokuto, not expecting much._ Was he in one of his moods again?

_But when he looked at him, Bokuto was staring at particularly nothing, with a daydream like expression on his face._

_Maybe it was the clouds, or the sky as it plunged into the night. Or, maybe it was the bell on the door as it jingled when a customer left, but Kuroo had no clue what he was looking at._

_He had that serious looking expression on his face again too. It was nothing too intense, but whatever deep thoughts he went into were concealed behind his small smile._

_Kuroo couldn't tell if it was a happy one or a sad one._

_But what was there to be sad about?_ _As loud and open Bokuto can be most of the time, he was a really hard book to read whenever he gets like this._

_For some reason, Kuroo felt uneasy when he didn't know what the other was really thinking._

_"What is it, Bokuto?" Kuroo asked again when the other wasn't saying anything after some time._

_"Do you believe in fate?" Bokuto spouted out of nowhere, staring at the empty space in front of him._

_"Hmm," Kuroo tilted his head, pursing his lips to the side as he tapped his fingers on the counter, "Well, there's no proof that it does or doesn't exist. But things happen for a reason, so in some ways—yeah, I do."_

_Bokuto only hummed in response, but it did nothing to quell the unexplainable feeling of uneasiness Kuroo had._

_"What about you?" Kuroo asked, getting ready to order as another customer rang in._

_Bokuto finally moved, slapping on his trademark smile to welcome the new customer. He turned to Kuroo to answer his question._

_"Not really."_

* * *

"Can we leave?" 

Not even one step into the café that Kenma already felt like leaving. Akaashi didn't want to be here either, but it looks like there was nothing the two of them could do. 

"Where's Kuroo?" Akaashi looked around, hoping to find a table secluded from the curious crowd that was gathered here for some reason. He dragged Kenma by the arm before the other could escape, and led the two of them to the farthest corner of the café.

While Kenma had his games to keep himself busy from socializing, Akaashi was even more anxious than he realized. He didn't exactly hate public crowds, but he doesn't adore them either. He wished he at least brought something with him to sketch with to distract himself from the awkwardness that he felt. He fiddled with his fingers, waiting for Kuroo to hopefully find them soon. 

And as if on cue, the devil himself appeared. 

"You guys made it!" Kuroo smiled happily, hugging Kenma from behind as Kenma took every ounce of energy he has to not punch Kuroo in the face. 

"Yeah, why did we again?" Akaashi asked, wondering if he could get an answer of what made Kuroo drag them out tonight. 

"Oh yeah! This!" Kuroo pulled out what looked like a microphone from his apron pocket, tapping on it a couple times to test as it sent feedback, "Testing test, one two!"

He turned his back to Akaashi and Kenma, facing the crowd as he hopped onto a little stage that Akaashi didn't notice was there before when they walked in. 

_Ohh, so that's what everyone was huddling around over._

"Alright, gang! We got this new karaoke machine out here for you guys, and the first ones to show you people firsthand is yours truly, and our new recruit and my bestest friend a bro could have—BOKUTO KOUTAROU!"

As much as Akaashi wanted to roll his eyes away from the second hand embarrassment he got from Kuroo acting like an MC, he looked to see the crowd turn their heads to someone who came out of the backroom dramatically. He stepped out from behind the curtains of the backroom, hopping on the little stage next to Kuroo. 

Just as dramatic as Kuroo, the one who came in acted as if he was on a stage, his face turned away from the crowd as he pressed some buttons on the machine, the crowd anticipating of what song they were gonna choose. 

Akaashi took a closer look to the one standing next to Kuroo, the way that his hair was styled was looking awfully familiar...

_OH—_

"Hey guys, I'm Bokuto!" 

The guy with the with golden eyes that pinned Akaashi to the ground smiled brightly towards the customers, "Since tonight is our first Open Mic night, let's call this a test round!"

The small crowd that gathered tonight cheered with a scattered clapping around the café.

_So, his name's Bokuto, huh?_

"Why, you know him?" Kenma asked him, putting away his dead phone in his pocket, and pulled out another handheld game from his bag, "He's Kuroo's friend. We met him in high school I think. He's an odd ball, but you get used to it once he starts hanging around you."

Akaashi sputtered, trying his best to look away as Bokuto and Kuroo were fixing up the machine and microphones, "Did I say that out loud?"

"Said what?" Kenma powered up his game, "You're interested in him, aren't you? I can see it in your eyes."

"Me? Interested?" Akaashi tilted his head to the side, looking back to Bokuto, who finally figured out the system and ushered Kuroo to get ready. 

"Alright, here we go—!" Bokuto chuckled into the microphone, music booming out of the machine and filling the air. It wasn't too loud to hurt anyone's eardrums, but it wasn't so soft that no one could hear it. 

The music that started to blast was something that Akaashi recognized as very _noisy_. An upbeat rhythm that could make anyone feel like they should start dancing. It was an old song, but Akaashi thought it sounded...bouncy? 

Whatever it was, he thought of it as something very fitting for someone like Bokuto from what he gathered about him from their five minute interaction.

When Bokuto opened his mouth to start singing the first lyrics of the song, Akaashi was not ready...

_"I thought love was only true in fairy tales—"_

Akaashi did everything he could to bite back the laughter that was dying to bubble out. The way Bokuto held the mic with both his hands, and practically screamed the words out from heart with his eyes closed rather than looking at the words—that was a sight that Akaashi knew he wouldn't see every day.

_"Meant for someone else but not for me—"_

Kuroo posed as he sang the next lines, obviously looking straight at Kenma; he had surprisingly put his game down just for this performance. Akaashi could spot the little smile across his face, and he too couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculous Kuroo and Bokuto looked as they exchanged lyrics together.

_"Love was out to get me..."_

_"That's the way it seemed..."_

The two danced around the little stage jokingly, having their own fun and not paying mind to any trying to actual sing the words together.

_"Disappointment haunted all of my dreams..."_

Bokuto took the next lines, and maybe it was his imagination, but Akaashi could've sworn that those eyes of his were staring right at him when he did...

_"Then I saw her face...now I'm a believer!"_

The small moment was interrupted when Kuroo shoved Bokuto lightly aside, taking back the center to sing the next...

_"Not a trace...of doubt in my mind!"_

_"I'm in love..."_ Bokuto's smile grew wider somehow, Akaashi noticed, and continued on as carefree as Akaashi has ever seen anyone been, and frankly...

He really liked it. 

_"...and I'm a believer—I couldn't leave her if I tried..."_

* * *

"What the hell was that."

Kenma said it more like a statement rather than a question, when his boyfriend finally came back to the two after that little duet. After that performance, more people were trying out the machine one by one, the sound of music and laughter filled the quiet night.

"That was a little something I'd like to call, helping out a friend," Kuroo winked towards Akaashi, who did nothing more than raise an eyebrow, but chose to ignore Kuroo like he usually does. 

"I'm gonna get a coffee," Akaashi stood up, looking towards Kenma to see if he wanted anything. Kenma shook his head, and the other nodded in affirmation. Just before he left their table, Kuroo was able to catch him off guard with a smirk, and said—

"By the way, Bokuto likes it when people compliment him."

"Shouldn't you be working right now?" Akaashi tilted his head confusingly, "And what would I compliment him for?"

Kuroo shrugged, and proceeded to focus his attention back on Kenma. And just as he does, Akaashi ignored his statement. 

He stood in the not so long line from the counter, secretly hoping the others would hurry up quickly. 

But once he got to the front, Akaashi wished he was at the back of the line again. Except, there was no one else behind him, and he was next one up. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, hiding himself with the front of his bucket hat.

"Hey hey!" He heard that cheerful voice of the guy with the golden eyes say, "What can I get—Oh! It's you!"

Akaashi sighed, finally peeking out from his bucket hat to stare into the eyes of the literal _sun._

"I'll have..." Akaashi's focused thoughts almost ran away, just when he thought that smile couldn't get any brighter.

He was so _wrong._

Bokuto somehow seemed a lot more energetic now compared to when Akaashi saw him with the other customers before him, almost like a dog wagging its tail when their owner comes home.

"Just an iced mocha for me please," Akaashi finished his order, taking out his money to give it to Bokuto. 

"You got it!" Bokuto exclaimed, taking the cash from him and searching through the register to give the exact change. His smile quickly turned into a pout, his eyebrows furrowed confusingly. 

Akaashi figured that he was struggling to do the math in his head.

"Where's Kuroo when you actually need him," Bokuto muttered under his breath, but loud enough for Akaashi to catch. 

"Do you want some help?" 

"I can do math! I'm in college too, you know!" Bokuto refuted back, finally getting the right amount and handing it over. He grabbed a cup from the stack and a sharpie in his other hand.

"Alright," Bokuto smiled excitedly, "What's your name?"

"Akaashi," He blinked, a bit stunned by the energy that this person had. "Akaashi Keiji."

Bokuto's grin grew wider, quickly scribbling down his name and turned around to start making his coffee, "One iced mocha comin' right up!" 

Rather than going back to the table to wait for his drink, Akaashi stood by close next to the counter, slipping not so subtle glances towards the other making his drink. That was when he knew his eyes weren't playing tricks on him.

Bokuto didn't have the red string of fate on his pinky either. 

_Is it some kind of glitch? Do strings of fate even have glitches? Is it possible that not everyone has them? Or is it something else?_

Akaashi's thoughts ran through all different kinds of possibilities of what it could've meant. His eyes never left Bokuto, analyzing every variable that comes to mind and taking out any ideas that sounded ridiculous. 

However, the other's actions distracted him from his deductions, constantly moving from one place to another. He noticed the way his tongue stuck out slightly to the side as he messed around with the machines, humming to a song to pass the time. 

"Here you go," Bokuto beamed, holding the finished cup in his hands, ready to be served.

"Thank you, Bokuto-san," Akaashi gave him a small smile back, reaching his hand out to grab his drink from him.

And, that was probably a dumb thing to say, but considering their short encounter, he should've figured by now how clumsy this guy was.

Akaashi guessed that the other was surprised by how he knew his name even though he never told him—but what he didn't know was that this guy was so easily surprised, even the slightest thing like that was enough to catch Bokuto off guard and lose his grip. The coffee spilled all over the counter, dripping down and splashing its cold contents all over Akaashi's pants and shoes. 

Akaashi winced from the coffee seeping into his clothes, stepping back away on instinct. 

From the other side of the counter, he could see how much more panicked Bokuto looked, scurrying across, frantically shouting out apologies after apologies as he wiped down the counters frantically. 

"Hey, it's alright," Akaashi attempted to calm him down, and some of the other customers from other tables started looking in their direction. He did not want to draw any more attention from other people tonight. 

The frown tightened even more on Bokuto's lips, his panic never subsiding as his eyes never left the mess he made and his cheeks were red from the embarrassment. "I'm sorry! Gah! Not again, first I ran into you, then I spill coffee all over your clothes-!"

"It's fine, really," Akaashi meant it, he wasn't upset nor bothered much over it at all. 

In fact, he was more worried that Bokuto might drive himself into the counter with the way he kept cleaning in a frenzy, "It's just clothes."

"But they're your clothes! They look like they're very expensive!"

"It's not that big of a deal," Akaashi insisted, looking over to find some tissues to dry his clothes with, only to find the canister empty.

"Oh!" Akaashi heard another voice call out, "Bokuto made another mess again!" 

A guy with brown hair that looked like it was defying gravity came out of the backroom, eyeing the mocha colored rags that Bokuto had used to dry the counter.

"You are no help, Oikawa!"

"Where's Kuroo?"

Bokuto grumbled, grabbing the mop nearby to dry up the floors, "On his break, flirting with his boyfriend!"

Akaashi looked back to their table, and sure enough, Kuroo was still there, admiring Kenma as the other played his games. 

Oikawa gasped, "You even spilled it all over this hot guy's clothes, too!"

Akaashi whipped his head back to the two workers in front of him quick when he realized that Oikawa was talking about him. He gaped at the other, taken by surprise by his words, but opted to say nothing. 

He took a quick glance at Bokuto, clearly upset as he stared down at the ground as he mopped, but he didn't say a word either. 

"If there's anything we can do for you to make it up, just let us know—ow! Iwa-chan, stop hitting me!" 

"You stop flirting with the customers, Shittykawa!" The worker who just hit Oikawa scolded him, looking at Bokuto and sighed. 

The one Oikawa called "Iwa-chan" looked a lot more aggressive than the other two, so Akaashi figured that he was the one holding this shift together. His eyes trailed over to the thread on his pinky when his hand raised to hit Oikawa again, which was definitely there. 

Out of habit, he followed the thread to wherever it went, and was surprised to see that it wasn't going long as he expected. In fact, the person who was connected to him—

"You're so mean Iwa-chan!" Oikawa whined, sticking his tongue out childishly.

"Sorry about that," 'Iwa-chan' paid him no attention, and turned to Akaashi, "Bokuto's new here and Oikawa's a natural born dumbass."

"Hey!" Both Bokuto and Oikawa retaliated. 

"Kuroo!" 'Iwa-chan' ignored the two, "Get back here and remake this guy's mocha!"

"And you!"

Bokuto jolted in Iwa's tone of voice, freezing on the spot. Iwa took the mop away from him, and handed it to Oikawa who only complained, "You go settle this with this guy here. You were the one that spilled it on him, so you better compensate for it. Take your break for now."

"Really, there's no need—" Akaashi started, but was blatantly ignored when Bokuto nodded, looking dejected as he walked out from the counter.

Quickly, he face Akaashi and bowed down as far as he could, eyes shut tight and hands gripped into fists, "One last time, I'm sorry for spilling coffee all over you!"

Akaashi sighed in defeat, knowing that this guy was probably the type to feel guilty about these type of things even after they apologize.

"Just pay for my dry cleaning then."

Bokuto rose up, but still won't look at Akaashi in the eyes. Looking him up and down, it looked as if he wasn't the only victim of the iced mocha splash attack. 

"C'mon," Akaashi grabbed Bokuto's arm, guiding the two of them to an empty table.

"I'll be right back," Akaashi assured, quickly moving his way into the restroom, grabbing a handful of tissues from the dispenser. 

_Why am I doing this?_ He groaned internally, _do I just feel bad for him?_

When he got back, Bokuto was looking up at Akaashi curiously, eyeing at the amount of tissues in his hand. 

"Here," Akaashi offered some to him, "You got some on you too."

"Thanks," Bokuto said, accepting the tissues from him. 

Akaashi looked down at himself, the brown stain in his clothes were just starting to settle in. He guessed this wasn't really that big of a deal, rather, his pant legs were never really stained free in the first place. 

"Look, don't feel bad or anything," He sat down, trying to get whatever stain he could out, "Accidents happen, I've had worse things spilled on me other than coffee. Last year, I spilled a whole bucket of paint over myself."

He heard a small flinching movement from Bokuto, and looked up to see him still refusing to look at him. 

Akaashi sighed, "I don't want you to sulk over something like this when I already said that it was alright."

When Akaashi finished, he took another peek at Bokuto's hands, and confirmed for the tenth time tonight of what he saw. 

_So, there really is no thread. Does that mean that he doesn't have a soulmate? Is that really possible?_

Akaashi wasn't an expert at this kind of stuff, all he knows is that if the red thread connects to two people, they were destined to be lovers. Everyone that he met had one, with him being the exception. Seeing this now, meeting someone who doesn't have the thread that determines their fate—

It piqued his interest. 

"I don't know if you can tell by now, but I can be a bit of a spaz sometimes," Bokuto laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'll pay for everything, though. How about I give you my number?"

"Is that a pick up line?" Akaashi slightly smirked, crumpling the tissues in his hand.

Bokuto gaped his mouth open at him, his ears turned pink at Akaashi's remark. "It wasn't!! I just think that I gotta contact you somehow, y'know?"

"I know," Akaashi replied, "I was just messing around."

His golden eyes widened and his lips pouted in a look that Akaashi compared to a puppy. Bokuto furrowed his eyebrows at him, just before his expression quickly dropped and replaced with a laugh that boomed loud enough for the whole café to hear. 

"I never knew Akaashi knew how to make jokes!" 

Akaashi tilted his head confusingly, "Have we met before?"

"Well," Bokuto looked down for a second, a bit lost in thought. Whatever memory he was thinking of, he simply pushed it aside as he waved his hand in the air, "I did run into you and almost cracked your skull to the ground."

"Oh yeah," Akaashi shifted his eyes to the side at that, a feeling of warmth crept behind his neck from the recent memory, "How do you suppose you compensate for that, too?"

"Free lunch?" Bokuto offered, holding his hands out as an image to what he meant.

Akaashi hummed at the amusing way he and Bokuto were able to carry on their conversation with one another with ease. They even exchanged numbers, just as Bokuto promise, to pay Akaashi later. To be honest, it was Bokuto who was talking most of the time, with some witty comments from Akaashi to tease the other a little, but they didn't mind.

"By the way, I really like your hat," Bokuto commented, reaching over to tip the hem of Akaashi's bucket hat.

"Thanks," Akaashi reddened a bit in embarrassment by the other's sudden compliment, "I made it myself."

"You _made_ that?" Bokuto gaped at him with surprise, his eyes sparkled with fascination at his handiwork, "I want one!"

"I could make you one."

Bokuto perked up, "Really?"

"For ten thousand yen."

"Rip-off artist!"

Akaashi smiled to himself at the pouting expression Bokuto had. He wasn't used to people noticing things that he made, most never really asked. The feeling he got when Bokuto praised him really caught him off guard.

And he really liked it. 

At some point, Kuroo had come by to drop off his drink for him, but Akaashi didn't notice since he was too engaged with talking to the guy who apparently loved to talk with his hands animatedly. 

"You played volleyball, too?" Akaashi asked, leaning against the table with his palm under his chin, "I was a setter in middle school. I stopped after that since I had to keep changing schools. I didn't have a reason to continue playing anyways."

"We should've played on the same team then!" Bokuto huffed, slamming his hands on the table excitedly, pointing a thumb at himself. "You could've set for me! Trust me, just one look and I could've gotten you to play volleyball with me!"

"We went to different high schools, Bokuto-san."

"Tch! You know what I mean Akaashi!"

"Maybe in another life we could have been teammates," Akaashi wondered out loud, "Who knows?"

"I still want to play with you though!" Bokuto ruffled his hair, leaning back on his chair, "I sometimes play volleyball with Kuroo and some other friends. You should come!"

"I'll think about it," Akaashi replied in a low voice, emptying his cup of mocha. 

It wasn't long until Bokuto had to go back to work. They only talked for almost thirty minutes, but Akaashi felt like he could've kept going on for hours. He got up from his seat, and threw away his cup in the trash. He walked back to his table with Kenma, who had successfully charged and switched to playing games on his phone again. 

"I can't believe you left me alone," Kenma stated with no trace of real hurt in his voice, "You traitor."

Akaashi shrugged, not saying a word as he sat back down in his original seat.

"By the way," Kenma continued, "I'm going to Kuroo's place again tonight. He has to play video games with me in return for being forced to come here."

"Does that mean you're staying until closing?"

"Mhm," Kenma took a bite out of a cookie he got earlier, "So you can go back to the dorms if you want to, I'll be fine."

If Kenma told Akaashi that he could go home a week ago, he would have left already with no hesitation. However, this time, Akaashi snuck a glance at the worker who had spilled coffee all over his pants, smiling away as he made whatever drinks for the next customer. 

"Maybe I'll wait with you," Akaashi said, taking Kenma by surprise, "There isn't much I have to do back in the dorm anyways."

"Suit yourself."

Now Akaashi really wished he brought his sketchbook with him, just to pass the time. He still has an hour until closing. All he did was face out the windows of the café and stared as the bright lights of every passing car blurred by, trying his best to ignore the dark reflection of someone.

* * *

The busy café from the early night became empty as soon as the clock hit 11 PM. Kenma and Akaashi were the only ones left, as the nightshift workers were finishing up cleaning as they played music in the background.

Akaashi decided to take a little nap on the table, and right when it was time to go, someone's else's voice woke him up.

"I can't believe you actually stayed, Akaashi!"

Akaashi lifted his head up from the table, a bit startled, but the feeling quickly subsided as fast as it came.

"I figured, why not," Akaashi blinked to adjust his eyes to the lights, stretching his arms a bit to loosen his tight muscles, "Are you guys finished now?"

"Yep!" Kuroo called over, taking off his apron, "It's time to go now! Oikawa and Iwaizumi left already, so I'm the one locking up tonight. Let's go!"

The four of them walked out of the café, with Kuroo being the last one behind to lock the doors. He tossed the keys in the air and caught it with his hand, hooking an arm around Kenma's shoulders.

"We'll see you guys tomorrow, then!" Kuroo exclaimed, waving his hand as he walked away with Kenma, "G'night guys!"

Kenma gave a small nod to the other two, no trace of exhaustion in sight, "Good night."

Akaashi watched as the two of them walked in the direction to Kuroo's apartment. As usual, he trailed over the red thread that had connected them together, glowing brighter than any of the streetlights that were lit in front of them. 

It was a bit entangled, sure, but it was still there.

Akaashi felt someone tap his shoulder, and remembered that he wasn't alone tonight. He turned to face his company, realizing just how much taller this outgoing guy was.

"You're going back to the dorms, right?" Bokuto held his shoulder, and Akaashi could still smell the coffee that still lingered on him, "I'll walk with you."

Akaashi only nodded, following the other into the night as he led the way. He shivered slightly as a gust of wind blew in their direction, stuffing his hands in his pockets. He stared down at the ground as he walked, kicking the pebbles that he comes across to fill the silence.

It's not long until he heard some ruffling noises beside him. When he looked up, Bokuto had already taken off his jacket and threw it over Akaashi's shoulders.

"You must be cold," Bokuto smiled softly, adjusting the collar so that it wouldn't slip.

Akaashi widened his eyes in surprise, noticing how Bokuto was only wearing a long sleeved sweater under, "Aren't you too?"

"Heh! I'm as healthy as an ox and strong as a horse!" Bokuto boasted proudly, "A little cold wind won't hurt me! But I don't remember that jacket being so big."

"Hmm," Akaashi hummed, slipping his arms in the sleeves of the jacket, and sure enough, the sleeves were long enough to cover his hands, and the hem of the jacket almost reached his mid thighs.

"They do say idiots don't catch colds," Akaashi played with the sleeves a bit, the strong scent of caffeine filled his nose.

"Hah!?" Bokuto gaped at the stoic expression on Akaashi's face, "Who are you calling an idiot!"

The walk through the park felt a lot less lonely with Bokuto around, and Akaashi was content with it. He listened as the other talked. They talked about their time in high school, and about they're majors in college too. 

Turns out, Bokuto was studying to become a physical therapist, much to Akaashi's surprise. He never really struck him as the studious type.

"You live in this building too!? What floor?" Bokuto continued as they finally entered their dorm building. They decided to go up the stairs instead of the elevator.

"I live on the third floor," Akaashi replied, walking a bit slower when they reached the second flight of stairs, "Kenma's my roommate."

"Oh! So that's how you know Kuroo," Bokuto laughed, subconsciously matching Akaashi's pace, "I'm on the fourth floor! My roommate's name is Tanaka, but he spends most of his time at his girlfriend's place. He's still a cool guy though!"

When the two finally reached the third floor, Akaashi felt a little sad when he and Bokuto said their good nights.

He sighed, remembering just how quiet the night was. When he reached his room, he realized that he was still wearing Bokuto's jacket. 

_I guess I'll return it next time I see him,_ he thought. 

Once he removed it, he began his night routine, cleaning himself up after a long night.

Akaashi had just finished showering, and when he entered back in his room, he saw that his phone was filled with notifications. He smiled down at the name he saw Bokuto give himself.

_**From: Bokuto >:3** _

_Akaaaashiiii_

_Akaashi are you asleep yet??_

_I forgot my jacket from you >:O_

_YOU THEIF_

_Theef_

_How do you spell theiff_

_Thieif_

_That doesnt look right T-T_

_JUST KIDDING HAHAH you can keep it for now if you want!_

Akaashi smiled down at the string of texts Bokuto left. He plopped himself on his bed, laying his stomach on his pillow.

_**From: Akaashi** _

_It's spelled thief._

_How did you ever pass high school?_

_**From: Bokuto >:3** _

_GASP_

_So you WERE awake!!_

The two of them continued to exchange more texts with one another, with Akaashi attempting to throw a joke in here and there, and Bokuto just being Bokuto.

As soon as the clock hit two, Akaashi was close to passing out, heavy eyes ready to fall asleep just as he caught one last glimpse of Bokuto's text. But before he knew it, Akaashi's hand fell at his side, the lowered brightness of the screen shadowing his features as he knocked out.

**_From: Bokuto >:3_ **

_Did you fall asleep now Akaashi?_

_..._

_AND HE'S DEAD!!_

_I guess I should turn in for the night too :^]_

_We should play volleyball tmr if you don't have class!!_

_Toss for me or you're a loser :P_

_Just kidding again! But fr, I'll drag you if I have to_

_Gnight Akaashi, sleep tight :)_

* * *

It's been a couple weeks since Akaashi met Bokuto, and it has been a whole other experience for him. 

Bokuto would end up finding Akaashi every morning whenever the two met up halfway at the staircase, and end up walking to class together. Or, more like Bokuto drops Akaashi off to class, causing him to run all the way to the other side of campus just so he wouldn't miss his. 

Bokuto also kept his word, and dragged Akaashi off to meet Kuroo and their friends for a friendly game of volleyball. They all greeted him with an energetic smile, even that Oikawa guy Akaashi met the other week was there too.

"So _you're_ the Akaashi that Bokuto won't shut up about!" Terushima exclaimed, a guy who specifically stood out to Akaashi solely because of his tongue piercing and extremely lively personality that could rival Bokuto's by a close second. 

"I don't always talk about him!" Bokuto quickly retaliated, quickly holding onto Akaashi's shoulders to move him away from the dyed haired blonde, "Don't listen to that cropped crow headed bastard!"

"Bokuto, didn't your mother ever tell you lying was bad?" Oikawa said, poking Bokuto's side teasingly.

Akaashi watched as the others playfully made fun of Bokuto, not really listening to what they were saying. He noticed the way Bokuto pouted at every remark, shouting back at his friends with his fist waving in the air.

"He's always been a feisty guy," Kuroo sneaked up behind him, a volleyball in his hand.

Akaashi nodded, his eyes never leaving Bokuto as he roughhoused with the others, "I didn't expect that I'd want to hang out with a guy like him."

"Why not?" Kuroo spun the ball in his hands, bumping it a little as he continued, "Sometimes you can't help but be reminded of a huge dog when you first meet him. Then before you know it, you find yourself getting more attached to him."

Akaashi silently agreed, not wanting to show just how true it was when Kuroo said. He had expected that Bokuto would talk to him every once in a while, maybe a small conversation now and then when he visited the café.

What he didn't realize was that Bokuto was a black hole of chaos, who already sucked Akaashi in the first moment they met. When the other had surprisingly ran into him the day, knocking him onto the ground as Akaashi got caught up in those bright, golden eyes of his. 

It was like Akaashi was blinded by the lights. 

"But other times," Kuroo continued, mostly to talking to himself as he smiled down at the ball, "I can never know what ever goes on in his mind."

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, expecting a witty joke for Kuroo to make after, but the other didn't say anything else. 

"Why would you ever want to know?" Akaashi quipped, not quite understanding what Kuroo meant by what he said.

Kuroo let out a small chuckle instead, "Yeah, you're right."

"Okay Akaashi," Bokuto's voice called out to him, bringing him out of his thoughts, "Let's see what you got!"

Kuroo tossed the ball to Akaashi, who caught it swiftly in his hands, "As the new guy, you have the honor of taking the first serve."

"I might be a little rusty," Akaashi looked from the ball to Bokuto, giving the other a slight sly smile as he spun the ball in his hands.

Bokuto smiled back, "Doesn't matter to me."

"Make sure you hit all my tosses then, Bokuto-san," Akaashi smirked, walking pass him to prepare for his serve.

Bokuto's grin grew wider, following Akaashi behind him as he readied to his position.

"Let's see how good your tosses are then, Akaashi!" 

* * *

After Akaashi's last class of the day, he came back to his usual routine of going to the park, sketchbook and pencil in hand, hoping that some kind of motivation comes back to him again. 

He had already drawn different sketches. Sketches from the people he saw to the cherry blossoms that were falling off from its stems. 

Nothing. 

None of those sketches were the ones that Akaashi was looking for. Not even watching the red threads dragged around by people were enough to divert his attention away from his frustration. 

He sighed as he tore a page from his book, crumpling it up when he heard a cheery voice call out his name.

"Akaashi!" 

He turned his head, and saw Bokuto running up to him in his usual work clothes. Distracted, Akaashi started to roll the paper around in his hand, waving the other towards the café worker slowing his jog to a stop right in front of him.

"Hello Bokuto-san," Akaashi greeted back, the exasperated feeling slowly disappearing.

"Heh!" Bokuto caught his breath as he leaned against the bench Akaashi was sitting on, "Whatcha got there, Akaashi?" Bokuto asks, peering over his shoulder. 

"It's nothing," Akaashi answered, looking down at the crumpled ball of paper in his hand, "Just another failed attempt."

"Can I see it?" 

Akaashi handed the paper to Bokuto. When he unfolded the creases and wrinkles from his ripped out sketch, his expression held an astonished look in his eyes.

"You...you drew this?" Bokuto gaped, pointing at the drawing that Akaashi only thought of as mediocre. 

It was a quick sketch of a cherry blossom, with one of it's petals dipping slightly into a puddle of water. 

Bokuto was astonished by the way Akaashi's simple "sketch" captured even the smallest details, from the particular features of the petals to the thorough rippling effect of the puddle. It was as if Bokuto could reach through the page and grab the flower from the wrinkled paper. 

"It's trash," Akaashi glanced to the side, too embarrassed to look at Bokuto in the eyes after seeing his genuine reaction, "I was going to throw it away later."

"Don't you dare!" Bokuto gasped, clutching the paper tighter as he shielded it away like he was protecting it from Akaashi, "Can I have it??"

"It's all crumpled up though," Akaashi tilted his head, confused by why he would ever want it in the first place.

"I don't mind," Bokuto chuckled as he slipped the paper in his bag, giving it a pat as if that will keep it safe from harm, "You were the one who made it. That's more than enough reason for me."

Akaashi was taken aback by Bokuto's words, heat reaching from his neck to his ears. He bit his lip to hide his growing smile, afraid of how Bokuto would react if he ever saw how happy that actually made him. 

"Sure," he gave him a small grin instead, closing up his sketchbook as he stood up, "Let's go."

"Go where?" 

"I need a change of scenery," Akaashi hummed, and pointed at Bokuto's attire, "You have work, don't you? Or did you forget?" 

"Pfft, I knew that!" Bokuto stuck his tongue out at Akaashi, blowing a raspberry, "I just happened to get distracted on the way."

"Oh yeah?" Akaashi queried, raising an eyebrow towards him, "How so?"

Bokuto took another side glance at Akaashi, grinning from ear to ear as he ran a hand through his hair. "I saw something pretty."

"It must be nice," Akaashi sighed, "Being simple minded."

"Who you calling simple minded?!" Bokuto cried out, blindly following him as the two of them headed towards to the café together.

* * *

"And that's how you make it into a picture!" 

Bokuto smiled pleasingly at his own handiwork—a lotus flower latter art that took him weeks to perfect. "Viola! What do you think Akaashi!" 

Akaashi looked over the counters, seeing the little art of steamed milk that Bokuto created from the other side, "That's really cool, Bokuto-san."

The café was slow tonight, and Bokuto had called Akaashi over just to have him watch him do this, not that he minded. 

Bokuto jumped around like a little kid who just got the toy train they've been asking for Christmas, proudly crossing his arms over his chest, "And it only took me two weeks to perfect! Aren't you proud of me?!"

"Very," Akaashi gave him a small chuckle, leaning over the counter as he stared down at the little lotus flower, "Do you mind if I have a go at it? I've always wanted to try."

Bokuto lit up at Akaashi's request, and immediately got the latte prepared, pouring in the steam milk carefully for him. Once he was finished, he slid the cup over to Akaashi and handed him a coffee stirrer.

"Knock yourself out," Bokuto grinned, giving him some tips on how to start off and some techniques that would help guide him. 

After around ten minutes, Akaashi started to get the hang of it, putting all of his attention into making single lines into the latte. Bokuto snickered a little, admiring the way Akaashi stuck his tongue out, eyes furrowed in concentration as he struggled to make the little details like he was painting on a canvas. 

"Not as easy as it looks, huh?" Bokuto hummed, peering over to see what Akaashi was drawing, but his head was covering most of it so he couldn't make out the picture. 

When Akaashi didn't answer back, he figured that the other was solely focused on creating the art, moving his head around to see the cup from different angles. Bokuto held back a snicker, not wanting to tell Akaashi that all he had to do was turn the cup a little, but the way he was angling his head was just too adorable for Bokuto to stop him. 

Not many customers came by to order, but Bokuto did his best to work around Akaashi to not disturb the artist at work. However, no matter how many times he tried to sneak a peek, it was always covered. 

Almost one hour later, Akaashi still hasn't moved from the counter nor said a word to Bokuto except short answers or a hum in response whenever he tried striking a conversation with him. 

He didn't mind how invested the other was getting with latte arts, but Bokuto was getting lonely. 

He leaned over the counter, nibbling on cookies that he may or may not have stolen from a certain coworker (but that's what you get from getting distracted by flirting with your crush on the job, right?). Once he had finished snacking, Akaashi mumbled about putting some finishing touches. 

"ALRIGHT WHO TOOK IT—!"

Akaashi flinched at the sudden outburst. Bokuto started coughing, and swallowed the cookie he was chewing faster than lightning, turning back to see a fuming Oikawa staring right at him. 

"YOU—!" Oikawa gave him a pointed glare, startling some of the customers before they realized it was just the usual, "Did you eat my cookies?'

Bokuto shook his head, wiping any crumbs from his mouth as subtly as possible, "No."

"Show me your stomach," Oikawa didn't believe him for a second, coming up to attack Bokuto when he realized Akaashi standing right behind him.

"Oh, hey, Akaashi!" Oikawa paused, the death glare leaving his face, replaced with his friendly smile, "I need you to be a snitch!"

When Bokuto looked back at Akaashi, he noticed the frown on his face, staring down at the latte art that he had been working on for the past hour. He didn't look angry or upset, just exhausted. 

Bokuto's eyes trailed down over to his attempted art, and stood agape at what Akaashi was working so hard on. 

"Woah!" Oikawa peered over, "Were you making this, Akaashi? Did I mess you up?"

Akaashi sighed, rolling his neck around after straining it for so long, "It's alright Oikawa-san, it was my first time anyways."

"FIRST TIME MY ASS—!" Bokuto tried hard not to bring his face so close, admiring Akaashi's artwork, "Even with caffeine you are a _god."_

"I still have a long way to go," Akaashi waved his hand, brushing his comment aside, "Besides—"

Bokuto eyes shifted from the latte art to meet Akaashi's expression. Looking at him now, he had to stomp on his urge to reach over the counter and hug Akaashi right then and there. 

"I like the feeling I get when you talk about how much you like it, Bokuto-san," Akaashi stared down at the ground, an inkling pink glow across his cheeks that Bokuto happened to catch. As much as Akaashi attempted to hide his smile, he could still see it.

Bokuto tried his best to hold back, but to no avail. He reached over the counter, carefully not to shake it too much to avoid ruining Akaashi's latte art any more. He caught Akaashi by the shoulders, causing him to lose balance and fall forward, with Bokuto catching him in his arms as he gave the shorter a tight squeeze.

"Akaaaashiiiii!"

Akaashi blinked back in surprise. The whole thing happened so quick, he wasn't able to register the right way to react just yet. He patted Bokuto's back, struggling to pinpoint exactly what feeling was growing in his chest right now. 

The latte cup sat in between the two of them. Mocha colored outlines laced in the steam milk to form Bokuto's smile, details of his spiked, colored hair was filled in, and so was the minute features of Bokuto's expression. The half defined outline of his uniform, which was the part Akaashi messed up on, made the work less definite; however, it didn't make Bokuto's admiration drift away from Akaashi. 

Not even a little bit. 

* * *

Once the café finished locking up, Akaashi and Bokuto headed straight for the dorms, just as they did every other night. As Bokuto talking animatedly to the night, with Akaashi listening attentively and threw in his own quips into their conversation. 

When they reached the third floor of the dorms, it was time for them to part for the night. Akaashi paused, hand in midair, reaching for the door handle that entered the third floor.

He turned back to Bokuto, giving him a gentle smile. 

"Good night, Bokuto-san."

Akaashi wasn't ready for the taller man to attack him in another tight hug, the thick smell of coffee emanating from his clothes. Before he knew it, Akaashi was taking in the scent, finding some sort of comfort from it. 

The strong mocha from Bokuto reminded him of the night that he lent him hid jacket, which, surprisingly, he still hasn't returned yet.

"I just wanted to give you a hug," Bokuto explained as he pulled away, stepping backwards when he let Akaashi go, "I've noticed you've been having a long day today. Call it me giving you a little energy boost!"

"Like a charger?" Akaashi wondered, touched by the other's thoughtfulness. 

Bokuto laughed softly, careful not to let his voice echo around the empty stairwell. He held up a hand in a salute with two fingers and his thumb as he went up back the stairwell. "Good night, Akaashi." 

Akaashi copied Bokuto's hand gestures, finally entering the third floor when the other disappeared out of sight. He could still smell the faint fragrance Bokuto must have rubbed on him when he hugged him, the scent still lingering in his clothes.

He fell backwards on his bed, not minding how his still wet hair from showering matted down on his forehead. He looked over across from him. Kenma was spending another night with Kuroo, and he hasn't received any texts yet from Bokuto. 

He shifted in his bed, laying on his side as he took not so subtle glances at his phone beside him. Akaashi wondered what he could be doing right now, since he was used to seeing any kind of text from Bokuto at this time of night. 

_Should I text first? What would I even say?_

Akaashi wasn't usually the one to text first, with anyone for that matter—it's why his phone was dry most of the time. He opened his messages with Bokuto, scrolling through the texts that he sends when he texts first. 

**_From: Bokuto >:3_ **

_HEYHEYHEY AKAASHI!! (Mon 10:54 PM)_

_GOOOOOOOD MORNING AKAASHI (Tue 8:42 AM)_

_lets walk to class together (' ∀ ' *) (Wed 7:53 AM)_

_do you wanna watch a movie right now >:O (Thurs 1:32 AM)_

_giraffes cant touch their toes ;-; (Fri 3:01 AM)_

Akaashi ended up spending more time reading their old texts they sent in the past few weeks rather than finding a way to come up with a greeting himself. 

After reading and rereading, Akaashi _still_ doesn't know how to be the one to start the conversation. It was always Bokuto who did most of the talking, and Akaashi was content in following his lead. 

_Am I overthinking this too much?_

But before he could have a chance to decide what to do, Akaashi found himself drifting to sleep. His thoughts started to scatter, not noticing or feeling the way his phone vibrated when Bokuto finally texted.

_Hmm, I just realize..._

Akaashi thought as he stared at the ceiling, struggling to keep his eyes open as his mind floated to sleep...

_I haven't really been paying attention to other people's threads lately..._

* * *

_"Hey, Akaashi!"_

_This time, Akaashi was wandering around the ocean, watching the currents make the waves crash vehemently against each other. He ignored the familiar, yellow snake that was slithering over his shoulder, calling out for his attention even after being ignored._

_"Akaashi, you can't ignore me forever," the snake hissed, placing its head on top of Akaashi's, "C'mon! Entertain me!"_

_Akaashi looked the other way, paying no mind to the snake constricted its body around him. He continued to stare at the horizon line of the ocean; no sunset, no sunrise, no nothing. Just the night. His eyes slowly following the outline of the sky and the ocean as he strolled next to the sea, the water splashing his legs occasionally._

_"One day," the snake continued, burrowing against Akaashi's hair like it was its own nest, "You know you'll have to make a decision, right?"_

_Akaashi attempted to not appear interested, continuing to stare at the horizon, "What decision?"_

_"So he does speak!" The snake replied with what Akaashi assumed as a hissed laughter, "But it's not like you don't know."_

_"Don't know what?"_

_"You know!" The snake hissed enthusiastically, moving its head around dramatically, "Your fears! Your weaknesses! Your insecurities!"_

_The snake snickered mischievously, slipping over to face Akaashi, causing the other to stop in his tracks._

_"And your true feelings!"_

_Before Akaashi could ask what that irritating snake was talking about, it disappeared from his shoulder. Suddenly, his whole surroundings shifted._

_Akaashi didn't realize that he was walking right into a memory that he long wanted to forget._

_He walked around his familiar childhood home, remembering this day perfectly clearly._ _The day his parents decided to split up._

_Akaashi was just only in middle school, but he could perfectly see the red thread between his parents, and he was old enough to understand the meaning behind that simple string. The more the two argued, the more tattered the thread looked._

_But no matter how much they did fight, it still stayed connected._

_Whatever they were fighting about in the first place, he couldn't bother to remember. Akaashi didn't understand what was happening, he had never seen this happen before. He peered over the staircase, conflicted over whether he should say something before things get more out of hand._

_Before he knew it, his father had laid a hand to his mother, and Akaashi's body refused to move as he looked away, listening to his mother's stifling cries as she fell to the ground. He heard a sharp noise dropping on the ground, and he noticed the shine from a pair of white scissors besides his mother's crouched frame._

_Why...can't I move?_

_That day and only that day, Akaashi had witnessed the breaking of the single thread that connected his parents for the very first time. His father had stomped out of the house to let out some steam, and his mother didn't move an inch from the floor._

_All Akaashi heard when he went back up to his room were the suffocating sobs his mother tried to smother, and his tears threatening to fall down his face when he saw the red thread snap in half._

_His dream started to shift again, but the suppressed feelings that came from that scene stuck with him, bubbling in his chest._

_Was there anything that I could've done?_

_The next thing he knew, everything was white. No ocean, no snake, no arguing parents, no nothing. Only the pounding heartbeat that was sweltering his ears. His hands covered his ears, crouching on the ground as the sound overwhelmed him._

_Why do I have to be the one to see these stupid red strings in the first place?_

_Akaashi felt like he was about to scream, his head pounding with that fear he had as a kid strangled his thoughts—_

_Until he felt a pair of arms wrap around him, so tight that Akaashi would've mistaken that he was being embraced by a huge bear. He didn't know who or what was holding him, but it was anything but suffocating._

_He faintly recognized the whiff of caffeine from the display of affection, almost too familiar—_

_It was comforting._

_"I just wanted to give you a hug," An indistinct voice whispered softly in his ear, causing Akaashi to melt even more into whoever it was that was comforting him—_

_"Call it me giving you a little energy boost..."_

Akaashi jolted up in his bed in cold sweat, covers kicked off his bed as he caught his breath. His hand reached over to his face, and he wasn't surprised to feel dried tears streak down his cheeks. He buried his head in his hands, his unsettling pulse pounded rapidly from the sudden shock. 

He tried to steady his breaths in an attempt to calm himself down, but the silence from the empty dorm room was not helping at all. He gripped his hands, clenching them in a tight fist to stop them from shaking so much. Akaashi laughed bitterly to himself, leaning his head back on his bed to stare at the empty ceiling.

_I guess I'm not as over it as I thought..._

Akaashi looked at the time, and winced when he saw that it was almost four in the morning. He stared at his phone, his finger hovering the one person he wanted to see desperately at this hour. He wanted something to distract him from his dream, and quell the unsettling feeling he had.

_Would he even be up right now?_

It was now or never, and Akaashi's thumb pressed on the call button over his number. He held the phone to his ear, matching his breaths to the phone's ringing in an attempt to even his breathing.

_"Akaashi...?"_ The sleepy tone from the other end was not unheard, and Akaashi immediately felt guilty, but he's already gone this far.

"Bokuto-san?" 

_"Why're you up so early?"_ He could hear the shifting sounds over the phone, and figured that Bokuto was sitting up just to listen to whatever Akaashi had to say to him.

_"Did something happen?"_

Akaashi contemplated a few times over his head if it was alright for him to keep Bokuto up like this. He chewed on his lip, not noticing the way a small wave of relief washed over him when he first heard Bokuto's voice when he picked up.

"...Can I come over?"

Bokuto was silent on the other end, a bit surprised by Akaashi's shaky voice. Akaashi covered his mouth, hoping that Bokuto wouldn't piece together that he had just woken up crying.

"Of course," Bokuto answered, his voice softening for Akaashi's comfort. He can hear more ruffling noises from the other end, and Akaashi never got up from bed faster this early in the morning. 

Akaashi slipped on his comfort slides, throwing on the nearest jacket he first saw and quickly shuffled out his dorm room. Quietly, he went up the stairwell to the fourth floor, and wandered around to look for Bokuto's dorm room number. His head moved from side to side, reading the numbers on plates. 

When he saw a door open, Akaashi froze in his spot, until he realized that it was just Bokuto who had just came out of his room. 

"Akaashi?" Bokuto caught his eyes, wearing a grey hoodie and carrying a red plush blanket in his arms. Akaashi walked up slowly to the other, a bit embarrassed that he called him up so early in the morning. 

"Good morning, Bokuto-san," Akaashi said sheepishly, stuffing his hands in his pockets. 

"Um..." Bokuto looked him up and down, and Akaashi had just noticed that his hair wasn't styled spiked up like it usually was. It was the first time that Akaashi has seen his natural hair down, with a slightly noticeable bedhead that he couldn't help but smile at. 

_Cute,_ Akaashi thought as the other looked at him with worried eyes. 

"Are you alright Akaashi?" Bokuto asked, adjusting the weight of the blanket in his arms.

Akaashi nodded, avoiding any eye contact with the other when he remembered why he asked to come here in the first place. 

Bokuto hummed, trying to get Akaashi to look him in the eyes, "Bad dream?"

Akaashi finally looked up, seeing the caring expression Bokuto wore. He only nodded silently in response. 

"I see," Bokuto smiled, walking out towards the direction to the stairwell, pointing with his head, "Come with me."

Akaashi raised an eyebrow confusingly, following the other up the stairwell simply out of curiosity. Neither of them exchanged any words, not even Bokuto. The only sounds that could be heard were the small echoes of their footsteps and the ruffling noises from Bokuto's blanket. 

When Bokuto stopped, Akaashi realized that they were about to enter the roof of the dorm building. 

"Are you sure we're allowed to go there?' Akaashi asked, holding onto the blanket as Bokuto fiddled with the locks, "Isn't this area restricted?"

Bokuto smirked, twirling a set of keys on his finger after unlocking the door, "Being friends with student council president Kuroo Tetsurou comes with its advantages."

Akaashi climed up the ladder with the blanket as he reached to the top. His face was met with a gentle, cool breeze, climbing out of entrance so Bokuto could come up next. Akaashi looked around the rooftop, and it was fairly clean for someplace that was barely used by the students here. And also...

He was astonished by the view that he would've only been able to see at this time of night, at this specific location. 

The multi colored lights of the city glowed bright in the distance, illuminating the darkness away from the night. The headlights of cars that zipped by were blurred to the naked eye, filling the quiet air with distant honking and engines revving. Akaashi looked down over the roof, and caught silhouettes of a few people walking past their dorm building. 

"Amazing, isn't it?" Bokuto sighed, looking around past the city and up into the stars, admiring the way the faint constellations radiated in the sky.

Akaashi could only nod, his breath taken away by this scenery Bokuto presented to him. Bokuto sat down next to one of the small benches that was close enough from the edge to see the setting, but far enough to not fall off of.

"Here, have a seat, you can still have the best view from here," Bokuto offered, patting a seat down next to him for Akaashi to take. 

Akaashi complied, sitting down at the spot with the blanket awkwardly on his lap. Bokuto laughed, wrapping the blanket around Akaashi's shoulders. He felt the warmth consume him quickly, hugging the blanket closer to his body. 

"What about you?" Akaashi asked, a little flustered by the other's gestures. 

"It's not the first time I've been up here, so a little breeze ain't gonna bother me that much," Bokuto stated proudly, leaning back on the bench slightly, "Besides—"

Bokuto gave Akaashi a side glance, making him redden under the other's sudden gaze, using the blanket to cover his flushed face.

"My jacket can't be the only thing that'll keep you warm," Bokuto teased, poking at the blanket that Akaashi decided to bury himself in. 

His eyes widened, realizing now that the very first thing he grabbed was indeed Bokuto's jacket that he kept forgetting to return from that night. Akaashi averted his gaze from the other, not wanting him to see the embarrassed expression he has on his face right now. 

"I was in a rush," Akaashi argued, a futile attempt to remain inexpressive. 

"Sure," Bokuto decided not the push it any further, giving the bundled up burrito next to him a small pat on his knee. 

The two stayed quiet for a little while, listening to nothing but the background noises the nighttime gave. Akaashi took in the scenery before him, letting all his worries melt away from him.

His eyes shifted over to Bokuto, who looked completely content. The other had a small smile in his face, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, resting his chin on the palm of his hand, thinking whatever it was that was on his mind. Or, probably thinking about nothing in particular.

"Aren't you going to ask?" Akaashi wondered, another gust of cold wind nipping at his nose.

Bokuto raised an eyebrow at the other, "Do you want me to ask?"

Akaashi shook his head slightly in response. 

"Then you don't have to," Bokuto reassured him.

"Why'd you bring me here then?"

"I don't know," Bokuto shrugged, sitting back up with his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, "I just like to come here whenever I need to clear my head. I thought that it'd help."

Akaashi hummed. "Do you usually come this late at night?"

"Sometimes," Bokuto answered, facing Akaashi with a smile, "I guess you can call me some kind of a night owl."

Akaashi watched as the other stood up abruptly, stretching out his back as he walked forward. Bokuto leaned forward with his arms folded on the ledge, looking up at the stars and the moon above him. He took in a deep breath, exhaling softly and steadily as he took in the calm atmosphere.

At this point, Akaashi wasn't paying attention to the city lights anymore, nor was he listening to the engines of the cars humming in a distance.

Right now, he was staring at the person before him. This loud, energetic, friendly goofballーwho also had this caring and thoughtful side to him. Bokuto's messy hair danced slightly as the wind blew, his head angled upwards with his eyes focused to admire every constellation unknown to the two of them. The moon shone right above him, acting as a spotlight as if Bokuto was the star himself. 

Akaashi did nothing but take in this moment right here, taking in this feeling of ease that was making all his fears fade away.

And Bokuto was the one who gave him this feeling.

Slowly, Akaashi inhaled the cool air, taking a deep breath as his eyes traced over the stars in the sky. He could hear Bokuto's faint voice, indistinctly humming a song that Akaashi couldn't point out.

"Hah!" Bokuto suddenly gasped, quickly turning around to face Akaashi with that wide smile on his face Akaashi grew fond of, "Come here! I wanna show you something!"

Bokuto's wave of enthusiasm made Akaashi curious. He stood up from his seat as he gathered the blanket around him so it wouldn't drag on the floor. He walked up to Bokuto's side, raising an eyebrow at the other as he pointed excitedly with his finger. 

"Look, look! Over there, Akaashi!"

Akaashi tried to follow the finger to where he was pointing to, but he didn't see anything. "Where?"

Bokuto groaned childishly, looking over to point at another building with his finger, "Okay, you see that building there? Then where the parking lot is?"

"The one in the north?"

"No, the south."

"Ahh, yes."

"Then, you see that bright red car that's turning?"

"Left?"

"No, right."

"I see it."

"Then right by that entrance where the park is."

"Okay—"

"Keep going straight, following where that big cherry blossom tree is—"

"Then I look left?"

"No, keep going right. Right in the middle of that street there."

Akaashi narrowed his eyes more, leaning his arms against the ledge as if it would improve his vision, "Is that—"

Bokuto bounced a little in excitement, "You see it right?!"

"Oh, next to the—"

"Yes!" Bokuto interrupted, not able to contain his liveliness, "From the right of the south parking lot, where the trail of the park begins, then turning right again next to the cherry blossom tree is the corner of the café we go to!"

Just as Bokuto explained, Akaashi could spot the corner of the café. In fact, now that he pointed it out, he could partially spot the top of the building clearly, despite how dark it was. 

Bokuto let out a high laugh, poking at Akaashi arm over the blanket he was huddled in, "It's the corner of the café! How cool is that?!" 

"Umm.." Akaashi pursed his lips to the side, "That's...uh..cool, I guess?"

"Don't you get it, Akaashi?" Bokuto turned swiftly to him, eyes big with interest, "That is the café, and you can see it from _here!!"_

"Mhmm, that's really...interesting?" Akaashi could only hum in response. 

_How else was he supposed to reply?_

"You're stupid," Bokuto playfully stuck his tongue out at him, "You just can't appreciate the little things in life."

Akaashi swayed Bokuto lightly on the shoulder, "Like the corner of the café?"

"Yes," Bokuto poked back, puffing his cheeks in a way that reminded Akaashi of a chipmunk, "You are a stupid and terrible person because you have no appreciation for corners of cafes."

"Hmm," Akaashi awed at the energy that Bokuto had, especially so early in the morning, "Maybe we should grab a cup of coffee later today."

"Why?" Bokuto teased, nudging Akaashi faintly to the side, "Is sleep deprived Akaashi already getting so antsy for his daily caffeine?"

"No," Akaashi quipped back, shifting the weight of the blanket on his shoulders, "I gotta get a better look at that café corner."

Bokuto stood silent at Akaashi's comeback, his mouth hanging open with no response coming out of it. 

Not even a second later, his hand flew to cover his mouth. His other arm gripped his side as Bokuto doubled over in laughter, his booming voice threatening to echo and wake up everyone within a 50 meter radius. 

Akaashi knew just how contagious Bokuto's laughter was as he himself let out the most carefree laugh he has ever made, with _zero_ attempt to hide it. He was laughing so hard that tears almost came out, and his mouth was starting to hurt from just how wide his smile was. He thought about using the blanket to try to muffle the noise, but Akaashi couldn't bring himself to.

_He just wanted to enjoy every second he spent right now with Bokuto._

"Akaashi," Bokuto hiccupped, his laugh gradually slowing down, "You really are something, aren't you?"

Akaashi's laughs eventually turned into soft chuckle. His face turned pink from the rush of the sudden adrenaline coursing through his body, coughing slightly as he shifted his eyes to the side to evade Bokuto's. 

"Speak for yourself," Akaashi mumbled fondly, aimlessly kicking the ground.

He didn't have to look, but he could tell that Bokuto's grin somehow grew wider, shining brighter than any lights that Akaashi had seen tonight. He looked up anyways, and saw how Bokuto tucked a lock of his hair behind his ear. Akaashi couldn't help but admire the way the gentle breeze brushed through his hair.

"You know," Akaashi adjusted the blanket, leaning over the ledge, "You should keep your hair more natural like this. I like it."

He watched as Bokuto started to stutter with a flustered look on his face, his cheeks turning pink from the small compliment. Akaashi wasn't sure exactly what Bokuto was trying to say in his defense, but he enjoyed the other's company nevertheless. 

_Kuroo was right,_ Akaashi just remembered, _I guess he really does like compliments._

They continued talking afterwards, and Akaashi almost forgot what made him so upset earlier in the first place. 

"By the way," Bokuto started after he collected himself, "I've noticed that you're always drawing."

"Well I am an art major."

"Not that," Bokuto rolled his eyes at his sarcasm, "I mean, like, you don't look like you seem to enjoy yourself when you do."

This was the first time Akaashi has heard of it. He stared at the other curiously, "What do you mean?"

"Hmm...it's like...how do I say this?" Bokuto raised an eyebrow at the sky, thinking hard as he tried to find the right words.

"It's like.." Bokuto began, "It's like you're forcing yourself to do something because you don't know what to do in the first place?"

When Bokuto realized what he said, he immediately shook his head, "I-I didn't mean it in a harsh way—!"

Akaashi's mouth hung open with realization, letting Bokuto's words slowly sink in. 

_It's like you're forcing yourself to do something because you don't know what to do in the first place._

"N-no, don't apologize," Akaashi frowned slightly, grasping at the fact of how _true_ it sounded, "I..I think you're right?"

Bokuto gave him a look, leaning against the ledge besides him, "You think so?"

"I guess..." Akaashi nodded, not wanting to make any eye contact because he was unaware of what expression he was making. "I haven't had any kind of inspiration lately. So then, anything I've been making now kind of...dissatisfies me."

The two became quiet for a bit as Akaashi's answer hung in the air. Bokuto nodded in understanding, understanding the frustration that Akaashi might have felt for so long because of this one thing. Akaashi never thought how his own feelings could have affected this part of him.

"You know, if it's inspiration you're looking for.." Bokuto broke the silence, turning to him with a sincere look in eyes.

"You should draw me sometime," Bokuto smiled, inching a little closer to Akaashi as he nudged on his shoulder again.

"Hmmm," Akaashi swayed a little, and blinked in surprise when Bokuto presented his offer in all honesty. He gave the other a smug smirk, "Maybe I will."

He didn't bother to move as Bokuto stared at him, realizing how their faces were close within proximity from each other. 

Akaashi held his breath, not knowing what to do or what to say, because he was afraid if he does anything, it'll break the tension of the moment right here. He felt his heart pound nervously in his chest, rising up almost like it was stuck in the back of his throat. 

Bokuto was starting to get a little too close...but Akaashi felt pulled in by his gentle nature.

Before he knew it, Bokuto realized what he was doing. His eyes widened, looking away from the other as he covered his awkwardness with a fake cough. Akaashi felt the heat reach his ears, swallowing whatever feeling that was stuck in his throat back down.

The two didn't say a word to each other, too nervous to look at each other in the eyes. And yet, neither of them moved an inch away from the other.

"H-Hey, hey, Akaashi!" Bokuto picked himself back up, shaking his shoulders slightly, "Look! This is my favorite part!"

Akaashi looked up from the ground right to the horizon that peeked behind the multiple tall buildings before them. He blinked, noticing the streak of orange light that started to glimpse as the sky slowly started to brighten up. 

The night greeted the morning as the sky became a mix colors of dark blue and orange. The background noises Akaashi has been hearing the entire time didn't changed in the slightest.

Akaashi quickly snuck a glance at Bokuto, who, was not so subtly staring at Akaashi when he watched the sunrise from this view for the first time. 

Suddenly, he was forgetting all those awkward feelings that just happened moments ago, traded for the emotions he's feeling right now. Bokuto had this day dreaming look on his face that he didn't even tried to hide when Akaashi caught him, only continued to smile as the other panicked slightly under his soft gaze. 

"You missed the sunrise," Akaashi said nervously, pointing towards the horizon.

"The sunrise?" Bokuto stopped for a second to look at the sky, hands flat on the ledge.

"It's not my first time seeing this," He leaned forward, "But the look on your face when you saw that for the first time?" 

Bokuto turned to Akaashi again, tilting his head in a way that made his stomach do all sorts of flips inside—

"I'd say Akaashi's expression is worth more than a million sunrises."

Akaashi's words got caught in his throat, not knowing exactly how to form the right words to respond to _that_. The way that Bokuto did not hesitate in the slightest, was all the more troubling for Akaashi than he thought. 

"Are you an idiot?" Akaashi could only say, his mind turned into a complete mess at the moment. He fiddled with the soft blanket around him, covering half his face with it. 

Bokuto beamed brighter than the sun that was finally arising, straying Akaashi further away from reason. Bokuto's gaze turned back to the city, the smile never leaving his face as he tapped the ledge with the tip of his finger. 

Akaashi's eyes shifted down to Bokuto's hands, reminding himself about the absent red thread that had always taunted him in some way when he sees it on other people. 

At first, not seeing the thread on him concerned Akaashi in some way. He was just curious to see if his eyes were playing tricks on him in the beginning. 

However, the more closer he got to Bokuto, the more dangerous he realized it became. Even so—

A part of Akaashi felt a sense of relief when he knew that Bokuto had no string connected to someone else. 

* * *

"So," Kuroo sorted through the amount of DVDs scattered on the floor, "When are you gonna tell him?"

Bokuto visibly flinched, quickly turning around from his computer to look at his friend, "I invited you over to help me with chemistry, not talk about Akaashi."

"We can multitask," Kuroo smirked, not looking up, "Because it seemed like something happened that you're not telling me."

"I dunno..." Bokuto rocked against his chair, staring at the ceiling while he balanced his pencil with his lip, "I almost kissed him, but I can't tell if he actually likes me back or not."

"You what?"

Bokuto froze, just remembering that _that_ was the thing that he forgot to tell Kuroo. 

"...I almost kissed him."

Kuroo smirked, letting out a short laugh. "You sly dog," He whispered. 

"I never did!" Bokuto pouted, "Besides, I don't even know if he would've like it or not."

"You never know unless you tell him!" Kuroo laid his back on the floor, "Aren't you two always together now?"

Bokuto hummed, looking down at his phone. No notifications. Or at least, no notifications from the person he was actually looking for. 

It was already final exam season, and Bokuto haven't had the opportunity to meet up with Akaashi lately with all the studying and final project deadlines coming up. They haven't been able to talk much either, since they're schedules don't exactly line up with each other. Bokuto was starting to get fidgety. He even sends a text when he has free time, only to be either responded with a one worded response or left on read. 

"What do art majors even do as final projects?" Bokuto asked Kuroo, burying his face in his hands, "He hasn't been answering my texts like he usually does—"

Kuroo gasped jokingly, "Maybe he got tired of you already!"

Bokuto's expression dropped, dreading the thought as he frowned at the lack of texts from Akaashi. 

"Relax!" Kuroo threw a pillow at Bokuto in his face, causing the other to lose balance and fall backward on his chair. 

"Don't joke about that!" 

Kuroo laughed, peering over Bokuto as he pointed at him with one of the DVD cases, "If Akaashi was tired of you, he would've left your dumb ass alone a long time ago. He isn't the type of person to lead you on like that, you know that."

"I know," Bokuto sighed, contemplating on the ground for a minute, "He's just been acting weird."

"How so?" 

"Well, ever since that night—"

"That night you took him to the roof to make out even though I keep telling you to stop going up there?"

"Anyways," Bokuto continued, ignoring Kuroo's remark, "Ever since that night, it felt like he's been...avoiding me."

Bokuto craned his neck back to look at Kuroo. "You think I crossed a line?"

Kuroo thought about it for a moment, putting the DVDs down when he answered. "Maybe he's just been too caught up with his projects right now. You see how he's always been so indecisive with his work."

"I guess so," Bokuto stared back up at the ceiling, arms sprawled either side of him while his legs dangled in the air from the seat of his chair.

Kuroo glanced from Bokuto to the mess of piled DVDs on the ground. He picked one up, waving it in front of Bokuto's face to grab his attention.

"Tell you what," Kuroo crouched next to Bokuto, spinning the case in his hand, "After final exams, I'll be hosting a little winter break party. Bring Akaashi, tell him Kenma's coming if he says no. Then, you can tell him how you feel about him before it's too late."

Bokuto chewed the inside of his lip, contemplating Kuroo's offer, "Do you think I can do it?"

"Who knows?" Kuroo shrugged, reading the little summary on the back of the DVD cover, "But I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't think you couldn't."

"I'll think about it," Bokuto hummed, running his hands through his unstyled hair as he finally got up from the ground to fix his chair back up.

"That reminds me," Kuroo poked at Bokuto's head, "You've been keeping your hair down a lot more now."

"Oh yeah, I guess I have," Bokuto picked at his bangs, feeling the strands fall loosely on his forehead, "I guess it's starting to grow on me."

"Man, the way you gelled your hair before made you look like a drunk bird," Kuroo teased, stacking the DVDs back in their shelves.

"Haha, very funny, now come help me. What the hell is an acid base equilibria again?" Bokuto turned back to his computer screen, running a hand through his face as his mind tried to stray away from his (probably but not hopefully nonexistent) love life for a few minutes.

Kuroo sighed, and scanned over Bokuto's screen, "I told you this ten times, it's when the reactants and products reach a state of balance with each other."

"Ohh," Bokuto felt like the gears in his head finally clicked, "I've been up all night trying to figure this out!"

"You really are a dumbass, aren't you?"

"Shut up!" Bokuto fought back, "I haven't been able to sleep a lot because of that dream I keep having!"

"What dream?" Kuroo inquired, leaning against his desk as he waited for the other's response.

Bokuto leaned his head back on his chair, staring at the ceiling above him. He closed his eyes, vaguely recalling the details of his so called dream that had always frequented his mind from time to time.

"The one with the red string."

Kuroo raised an eyebrow, "You mean that red string they told in stories when we were kids or something?"

"Yeah, that one," Bokuto sighed, scratching the back of his head as he focused back on his work.

"What's it about?"

Bokuto picked up his pencil again, trying to solve the new problem in front of him as he explained. "Like...I'm walking around some place, right? Like an empty village or something."

"Uh huh."

"And in the dream," Bokuto continued, "I have the red string on my pinky, and then I'm just following it. But it's almost never ending, and I end up waking up after. It's annoying."

Bokuto can vividly remember the first time he started to have that dream. It was some time during his first year of college last year that it happened, after a certain incident. It wasn't as if he had this dream every night, but whenever he did, he was haunted with the same ending every time.

Kuroo hummed understandingly. "Is that why you were asking me if I believed in fate the other day?"

"Yeah," Bokuto finished his work, handing it over to Kuroo for him to check. 

"It's been bugging me for a while."

* * *

Akaashi strolled down the unfamiliar street, looking for that particular address he had searched all over the internet for last night. His head turned, reading over every sign he sees.

It's been a week since Akaashi last hung out with Bokuto. Ever since that night, he hasn't been able to get him out of his head. 

_What was he trying to do so close?_ Akaashi can't help himself but feel flustered every time he remembered. With all these confusing feelings, Akaashi began to distant himself from Bokuto. 

He didn't know what to think or what to say; but he knew that he wasn't being fair to Bokuto by avoiding him for this long. 

_I have to talk to him soon,_ Akaashi sighed heavily, an anxious feeling coursing through his mind, _but first..._

_Where is it_...Akaashi thought as he started to get mildly irritated after hunting for this location for almost an hour now. 

_Tendou's Tent...Tendou's Tent.._

Akaashi almost did a double take when he finally found a big neon sign illuminating that same name on a window in front of a newly made restaurant. Not much of a tent like the name suggested, but it still holds its professionalism that Akaashi had hoped it had. 

"Let's hope this isn't a scam," Akaashi muttered to himself as he slipped his phone in his pocket. He held his breath as he opened the door, greeted by a surprisingly modern atmosphere. For a restaurant owner who also worked as a fortune teller, Akaashi would've expected it to be a little more of...eerie?

Whatever the case, Akaashi didn't come all the way out here to judge a building's appearance. He came here to look for answers. 

The place wasn't packed with people as he thought, but Akaashi walked up to the front desk to see the receptionist getting lost in a book. 

"Um.." Akaashi tried to catch the receptionist's attention, "Excuse me?"

The woman in front of him didn't even bother to look up. "Yes?" 

"Uhh..." Akaashi fidgeted with his fingers nervously, "I called last night? I made a...reservation? With Satori Tendou?"

"That—!" A sudden voice almost made Akaashi jump, causing him to look where a guy with wild red hair appeared. He had a mischievous look in his eyes, leaning against the desk while he shuffled a deck of tarot cards in his hands. 

"—Would be me," the red head that Akaashi assumed was Tendou answered, and he was almost already regretting his decision to come here. 

He was only wearing an employee uniform, but it still only took Akaashi one look at the other man to catch a mysterious vibe about him. He didn't seem like a bad guy, but he did have that feeling that he wouldn't be so easy to read either. 

"Akaashi, right?" Tendou pointed at him, tucking his cards in his back pocket, "Come in, come in! We can talk about that thing in here."

Akaashi hesitated for a moment, before gripping onto his bag strap and followed him. Right now, he doesn't have the luxury to wait until his questions was answered and his curiosity was satisfied. 

He followed Tendou into the dining area. The place had a few people eating casually, deep in conversation as Akaashi followed the eccentric man.

"Here, have a seat," Tendou sat in one of the booths, while Akaashi sat opposite from him. He felt a little awkward, his eyes still wandering around the room as he took note of every detail he saw. 

"Like what you see?" Tendou spoke, causing Akaashi to finally turn his head to look at him, "Don't be shy, I don't bite."

"It's not that," Akaashi shook his head, resting his hands on his lap, "It's just kind of my first time in a place like this."

"Oh yeah?" Tendou raised an eyebrow, tilting his head a little bit too much to the side as he examined Akaashi, "What do you think? I just started this business up, so I'm still workin' on a few kinks."

"I haven't been to many restaurants that offer fortune telling services, so I wouldn't know," Akaashi shrugged, "Anyways, it's not really my fortune I'm here to talk about—"

"I know," Tendou folded his hands together in interest, "You came here to talk about this, didn't you?"

Tendou held up his own pinky, exactly where the string was attached, and long connected to whoever it was connected to. 

Akaashi nodded, staring at that dangling red thread. "Yeah, exactly. You can see your own?"

"Nope!" Tendou shook his head, leaning back on his seat, "I can see everyone's string except my own. I can't see or touch my string in the slightest. Don't even feel it either, just know that it's there."

Akaashi lit up at that new information, his eyes quickly shifting from Tendou's pinky to his own. He held out his pinky towards the other, "Does that mean I have one?!"

Tendou picked at his hair, squinting at Akaashi's hand waving in front of him. He hummed teasingly, crossing his arms, "I get paid by the hour."

"But I already paid last night?"

"You paid for a reservation, strings of fate questions are a special case," Tendou smiled smugly, "Besides, you haven't ordered anything yet."

"How do I even know that you're the real deal?" Akaashi retorted unbelievingly, "For all I know, you could be sca—ah!"

Akaashi's argument was cut short when Tendou pinched the air, pulling slightly as the other was pulled forward towards the table. 

Akaashi was completely caught off guard by that, staring at the red head in disbelief. Tendou gave him a knowing look, pulling at the air more as Akaashi felt his hand lift up. 

"You..." Akaashi stared at the other's amusing expression with wide eyes, "You can touch them?"

"Well," Tendou twirled his finger around in the air, which, apparently he was wrapping Akaashi's thread around his own finger, "My family was born to deal with things like this. Might as well make some money off of this gift handed down by generations."

"I..." Akaashi was still trying to wrap his mind around this, "I...have a thread?" 

He had spent almost his entire life accepting the fact that he had no soulmate. To have this—this evidence that's right in front of him right now...

He had a lot of mixed feelings about it. 

"Are you stupid?" Tendou frowned, fiddling with his supposed thread in the air, "Everyone has one. The people who can see them, however, can't see their own with their eyes. Customers think I'm a fake at first. Some come to me just for this though, even if they can't see the strings at all. That is my job anyways. Seeing, touching—"

"—and cutting." 

Tendou had finally let go of Akaashi's string as he felt the tension from his pinky release. Akaashi looked down at his hand, feeling around to see if he could touch the thread himself. But nothing. 

After Akaashi heard Tendou's last words, he stared at the other confusingly, "Cutting the string is possible?"

"That is why people come looking for me," Tendou shrugged, looking rather bored as he picked at the table, "They ask me who their soulmate is, I tell them, for a price of course. They don't like the idea, and ask me how to cut the string right away."

Akaashi took in a deep breath, taking in all of these details. He chewed the inside of his lip as he stared down at his pinky.

_Cutting the string, huh?_

"Is that even...ethical?" Akaashi asked, "I mean, isn't the whole point of this red string is to be connected with your fated love?"

"If it's so unethical then tell me this," Tendou gave him a dopey grin, "Why do you think some people might not be so fond of the idea of having a fated mate?"

Akaashi took a second to think about it, but couldn't think of anything...anything else besides that bad memory he's been trying to bury for so long.

"Maybe...they knew deep down..it wasn't really meant to be."

"Well damn, you don't gotta be so depressing about it," Tendou gave Akaashi a look, and immediately pulled out his bag. "Not many people know how to find me anyways. It's just the ones who do, ask me for this specific request." 

"Let's see.." Tendou rummaged through his bag, leaving Akaashi alone to just stare at him as he did. Akaashi tapped anxiously on his knee, wondering what in the world Tendou could be looking for right now. 

"Here we go!" Tendou declared brightly, holding up a pair of scissors in the air, "This oughtta do!"

Tendou placed the scissors on the middle of the table. Akaashi stared down at them with a blank expression, cocking an eyebrow at the other. Tendou looked rather pleased with himself, like he was excited for Akaashi to ask him why he pulled this out. 

"So..?" Tendou prompted, waiting for Akaashi's answer, "Take it."

Akaashi complied, reaching over for the scissors examine it in his hands. They looked like a pair of normal scissors, a bit on the sharper side though. He ran his thumb over the logo, which was the same logo he saw in front of the sign earlier when he came in. 

"What do I do with it?" Akaashi inquired, putting the scissors back down.

"Have you not been listening?" Tendou craned his neck at the other, "Come on, you're a smart guy. It's not that hard."

_Scissors...cutting..._ It didn't take Akaashi long to piece it together.

"You used this to cut people's string?" 

"Bingo bango!" Tendou singsong, resting his chin in the palm of his hand, "Just like the red string, only people like us can see these scissors. I used this to cut the string of others who wanted to cut ties with their soulmate. After that, any lingering feelings that their soulmate felt will start to dwindle away. Just like the thread that was cut."

"So..." Akaashi started to ponder, staring at the pair of scissors as if it was staring back at him, "You just cut it? Just like that?"

"I'm not the one who does the cutting," Tendou shook his head, "It's a whole process. It's not as easy to cut the string as you think, the person who wants to cut it has to do it themselves." 

Akaashi bit at his lip in anticipation, twiddling his thumbs around on the table.

"What makes you think I want to cut it?"

Tendou pondered, staring at Akaashi questioningly, "Isn't that why you're here?"

Akaashi took a second to answer, thinking about why he came here in the first place. He looked down at his own pinky, deep in his thoughts.

_What was I looking for exactly?_

"Or, what, do you have a crush on someone that you're not destined for or something?" Tendou teased. 

"I..."

Akaashi paused, not knowing his own answer to Tendou's question that was only meant to tease him. He couldn't believe that he had hesitated to turn Tendou down, to tell him that wasn't the case.

But what he couldn't believe more was the image of a dark and silver haired person with a blinding smile flashing through his mind at that moment.

"If that's all you have to say," Tendou sighed, reaching to take back to scissors, "I guess you don't really need this then—"

Something stopped him before Tendou could. Something gripped tightly on his wrist, stopping his hand from taking the ethereal scissors before him.

"Oh?" Tendou slowly smiled at the odd gesture, "Hesitating, much?"

Akaashi's eyes didn't leave his lap as his outstretched arm that stopped Tendou froze in the air. 

Much to his own surprise, he didn't expect his body to react out of his own will. He didn't know what possessed him to stop him, but there was a nagging voice in his head that wouldn't leave him alone no matter how much he tried to get rid of it. 

_I have a thread.._.Akaashi's thoughts ran from his head. His impulse started to act up as his grip tightened around Tendou's wrist.

_Why would I want to get rid of it?_

"Hey, calm down," Tendou wriggled the wrist Akaashi kept squeezing onto, "And would you let go? You're hurting me."

Akaashi realized what he was doing and quickly apologized, letting go of Tendou's wrist as fast as he grabbed it. He quickly pulled his hand back closer to his body, not trusting himself to act without thinking again.

"No worries," Tendou laughed sheepishly, rubbing his wrist, "But now I'm intrigued. Why the sudden change of heart?"

"There was no change, there's no reason to cut the thread," Akaashi spoke in a low voice, attempting to gather his thoughts when he took one more tempting look at the scissors. 

_"Why do you think some people might not be so fond of the idea of having a fated mate?"_

_"Maybe...deep down, they knew..it wasn't really meant to be."_

"Gee, you're so serious, it's just a string," Tendou sighed, pushing the scissors towards Akaashi, "Just take it for now. And don't lose it."

Reluctantly, Akaashi grabbed the pair of scissors in his hands. He tucked it carefully in his bag, not knowing exactly what he'll ever use it for. 

"Can I ask you something?" 

"That's what I'm being paid for."

Akaashi chewed on his lip nervously, biting down on the very question he's been searching for an answer from the beginning. "What does it mean when you can't see someone else's red thread?"

"Pardon?" Tendou raised an eyebrow, leaning closer with his chin resting on his hand. 

"You know," Akaashi continued, "Have you ever met someone who doesn't have the string at all?"

"Maybe, maybe not," Tendou narrowed his eyes at him, "Everyone has some sort of thread attached to them in some way."

Akaashi looked down, a little bit disappointed. "Oh..."

"Hmm?" Tendou looked at the other with interest, "Why do you ask? Have you?"

"Yeah," Akaashi answered, messing with his bag straps, "I met this guy a while ago, and it looked like he didn't have a string at all. That's kind of why I came here in the first place—it's been on my mind for a while."

"I see.." Tendou hummed inquisitively as he took a moment to think. "Now that you mentioned it, there was something that my mother said about something like that when she met my father when I was younger."

"What was it?"

Tendou gave Akaashi a small smirk, tapping his finger on the side of his cheek, "She told me that she couldn't see my father's string at all either when she met him."

Akaashi's eyes widened, intently listening to whatever Tendou was saying to him. "What else did she say?"

"Well, I don't remember much, but if I had to guess," Tendou stared at the other with a mischievous grin, leaning over as he lowered his own voice, "I'm guessing that since people like us can't see our own string, whoever's string that we can't see—is our soulmate."

Akaashi froze in his seat with his mouth hanging open at Tendou's unexpected response. Suddenly, he felt his head spin as his words hit him like a truck that came out of nowhere.

_Him? And Bokuto?_

_Soulmates?_

"N-No," Akaashi refused, shaking his head lightly as his fists gripped tightly on his bag strap, "No, that's not—"

"Deny all you want, I've seen it all before," Tendou cut him off, "But no matter how much you don't want it to be true, you can't help but think that it just makes sense, right? I am pretty good at guessing."

Akaashi felt his throat swell up with the growing pangs pulsating through him, knowing that this was something he couldn't just brush off. 

_Why am I getting so worked up about it? Do I not like Bokuto in that way?_

His expression dropped, his eyes staring blankly at his hands as he realized.

_No...that's not it..._

"Judging by the look on your face, it looks like you figured out the little war goin' on in your head, yay!" Tendou clapped, amused by the other's internal struggle, "Now that you know, what, pray tell, are you going to do about it?"

Akaashi's eyes shot up quickly, trying to keep his face as neutral as possible, "Nothing."

"Hmm?" Tendou suspected, "I thought you said you liked this guy?"

"I never said—!" Akaashi felt himself raise his voice, almost losing his composure as Tendou egged him on. "I'm not talking about this with you."

"Isn't that what you paid me for?"

"Sorry, but I paid you for information, not to dump my problems on a stranger," Akaashi huffed, something inside him suddenly hurting at the mere thought of him liking Bokuto. 

He shifted in his seat, sliding out of the booth, "And that's all I came here for. I think I should leave now—"

Tendou cleared his throat, stopping the other in his tracks, "Don't you wanna know how to cut the string?"

Akaashi whipped his head at the other, a crimson color burning up his cheeks at the sudden realization he just had moments ago, "I told you—!"

"Just as a precaution," Tendou reassured, "I just think I should let you know, if the option ever is needed and you need to cut any emotional ties with this guy. You never know what could happen."

The fact that Akaashi hesitated was more than enough reason for him to stay for just a little while longer. He didn't even want to consider the thought as an option, but still...

"Right," Tendou smirked, folding his hands in front of him, "It's quite simple really. You take the scissors, and cut it right in front of him. Make sure you look him in the eyes when you do. Eyes are the windows to the soul and everything, and that includes your connection to your soulmate. If you don't stare at him straight in the eyes, the string won't cut."

Akaashi nodded understandingly, taking note of every detail and warning Tendou was giving. 

"After the string is cut," Tendou continued, "He'll start to forget any romantic feelings he may or may not have for you, slowly. It only affects the receiver, not the giver. Not everything will happen all at once, so you gotta be patient."

"So it wouldn't affect his memories at all?" 

"Nope," Tendou shook his head, "Just his emotions. For him, the emotions he felt in his memories of you would feel like an empty void of feelings that he can't pinpoint. _Amazing_ , right?!"

"Yeah...right," Akaashi answered reluctantly, still a little uneased by the other's bizarre perspective of things, "Anything else?"

"Right! One more thing—!" Tendou rummaged through his bag again, pulling out something that somewhat looked like a bottle of some drink.

"Since you can't see your own string yourself," Tendou explained, handing the bottle over to Akaashi, "Drink this, and you'll be able to see it long enough for you too make a clean cut."

"I'm telling you, I'm not gonna cut the string," Akaashi sighed, but was blatantly ignored by the other with the wave of his hand. "What kind of witch potion are you trying to swindle me with?"

"Oh, _now_ you think that I'm scamming you?" Tendou gasped in defense, feigning a hurt tone in his voice, "I'm _offended_ _!"_

Akaashi was just about ready to leave, but had to humor Tendou a little bit, "You're just giving me this?"

"Yup!" Tendou perked up, "You're actually the first customer I had that can actually see the string themselves! So I feel a sense of closeness with you that way."

"Please don't."

"And trust me on this mixture, it's been created and tested firsthand by yours truly!" Tendou declared proudly.

"You made this?"

_"And_ drank it myself, so you know I'm being legit!" Tendou added, "I made it for the people who would come to me to cut their strings. And how are they gonna cut a thread themselves that they can't see? So, I made this!"

_Isn't that a little dangerous?_

Akaashi held the bottle in his hands suspiciously, swirling the mixture around inside, "And it works?"

"Yup! The effects will only last for one hour though, just one sip should do the trick," Tendou answered, leaning back in the booth, "Besides, even if you don't end up cutting you and that guy's string, at least with this, you can see if you two are really connected to each, right?"

For once, Akaashi actually agreed. He knew that no matter how truthful Tendou's guesses sounded, he had to find out for himself. He knew that this kind of thing is going to keep him up at night, and he would be too afraid to face Bokuto himself again. 

And he really didn't want that. 

"Now I've said everything that I needed to say," Tendou slid out of the booth, "I'll be the first to get going. We should meet up again soon, and we can bond over our loneliness with some grilled meat next time!"

Akaashi slid out of the booth too, adjusting his bag as he slipped the bottle inside, "I rather not. But thank you, Tendou-san. You've been a great help."

After the two bid each other goodbye, Akaashi left the restaurant with some magical scissors, a magic drink, and a thousand thoughts clouding his mind. 

He had to stop walking in the middle of sidewalk for a minute to collect his thoughts.

_I...I like Bokuto?_

He never thought of something like that before. But the more he pondered over it, the more those confusing feelings he's been feeling lately made more and more sense. Akaashi frowned slightly at his newfound awareness, his cheeks heating up slightly at every memory he was starting to recall now. 

_Why..._

He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, opening up to see a text from the person that was currently the cause of the skipped beat in his pulse.

**_From: Bokuto >:3_ **

_AKAASHIII_

_Kuroo's throwing a party after final exams with Kenma in his apartment, wanna come?_

Akaashi couldn't ignore the way his heart jumped out of his chest excitedly when he got the text. He took in a deep breath to calm himself down, already sending out a quick reply to the other. 

**_From: Akaashi_ **

_Sure_

Not even one second later, as if he was waiting for his reply, Akaashi got another response back.

**_From: Bokuto >:3_ **

_ALRIGHT HEHE i'll see you this friday then !!_

Akaashi smiled down at the text, his insides doing all sorts of somersaults at the seemingly false hope he was holding onto. He shook his head, that dizzying feeling he had earlier was starting to come back. He continued on walking, in need to go home and clear his head from these rising emotions.

_Why am I not more happy about it?_

* * *

Kenma stared at his roommate crouching over his desk, sketching away whatever he had in his mind for the umpteenth time that he's met him.

Surprising as it is, Kenma actually likes hanging around Akaashi. He's probably one of the few people he feels that he could be alone in a room with for ten minutes without wanting to punch him in the face. Kuroo was not an exception.

Even so, he noticed how much more quieter Akaashi had been ever since he went out of town a couple days ago. Not to mention, he's been avoiding Bokuto recently and spending less time with him. He also kept staring at this weird bottle that he's been keeping on his desk, not saying a single cheeky comment whenever Kenma made fun of him. 

To be honest...it was kind of worrying.

"Akaashi?"

The other didn't say a word, not hearing Kenma calling out his name a few more times. Kenma frowned, and readied another pillow to launch at him in his hand. Then suddenly, Akaashi dropped his head on the desk with a loud bang.

"Kenma," He could barely hear Akaashi mumble out loud, "Can I ask you something?"

Kenma lowered down his projectile. "What is it?"

"What was it like when you found out about your feelings for Kuroo?"

"Awful," Kenma immediately responded, "It was so bad I wanted to swallow a thousand ghost peppers and down four boxes of milk from the school cafeteria to throw them all back up."

Akaashi snickered slightly at his response. "Then why'd you fall in love with him?"

Kenma sighed, finding some sort of interest in the hem of the pillow as he picked at it.

"Because even if I tried to do that, I know that Kuroo would be the first one to stop me," Kenma admitted, looking away from the other, "He may be a careless idiot with bad hair, but he cares a lot about me. And I care about him."

He heard Akaashi take a deep breath in, turning around to face the other with a confused look on his face, "If I were to tell you something completely crazy, would you believe me?"

"Crazy like what?" Kenma settled the pillow on his lap, leaning his head on top of it, "Like you being in love with Bokuto?"

Kenma chuckled slightly at the notion, until he heard a rumbling noise echo from the other side of the room. He looked up unexpectedly, seeing Akaashi just fallen out of his seat.

"Holy shit I was just joking."

"Is it that obvious?" He saw Akaashi's cheeks turn into a darker shade of red, keeping his expression neutral as he covered his face with his hand.

"Didn't know you were trying to hide it," Kenma answered, "You guys were practically glued to each other all year, it's almost sickening."

"I don't think that we're that close," Akaashi grumbled as he got up from where he fell and sat on his bed, "We just talk sometimes."

Kenma stuck his tongue out, "So meeting up almost every morning, getting coffee together, hanging out in each others' dorms, _walking_ home together after his work is just you guys talking _sometimes?"_

Akaashi buried his face in his hands, "Is it that bad?"

"Very," Kenma answered with all honesty, "You got it _bad."_

Akaashi groaned out loud, turning around as he fell back on his bed. He left his head partially hanging on the edge, not caring about the blood rushing to his brain. 

"I don't know what to do."

"Just tell him," Kenma suggested, as if it was the obvious choice, "You like him, don't you? And I'm pretty sure the feeling is mutual."

Akaashi shook his head, "I can't."

"What, is confessing too hard?" Kenma asked, shifting in his spot, "Well, it never is easy, but I think with a little confidence—"

"I mean," Akaashi cut him off staring up at nothing but the ceiling, "I can't like him."

Kenma scrunched his nose in confusion, "What kinda k-drama do you think you're starring in?"

"What?" Akaashi spun back up, looking a little hurt from Kenma's comment.

If it's one thing that Kenma hated, it's being involved with any kind of drama. He's already had his slice of romantic fiasco when Kuroo told him how he felt. After that, many tears and many arguments with himself later, they had _finally_ gotten together. 

"Look, it's not really any of my business what you do with your love life," Kenma continued, not sugarcoating anything in his words, "But recently, you've been a bit down about yourself. It's not like you, but you know you have to make a decision."

"But why do I have to be the one to make it!?" 

Kenma flinched at the way Akaashi almost raised his voice, staring up at the other in disbelief. 

This was the first time that he heard Akaashi sound so...devastated. He's seen him struggle over his work in classes and all, but this was the first time he's seen him so confused about his own emotions. This was something Kenma knew that he wouldn't be able to help him with.

Akaashi swallowed nervously, getting up quickly from his bed, "I'm sorry for yelling at you Kenma, I know you're only trying to help."

Kenma watched as Akaashi walk to his desk and grab that unopened bottle that's been sitting. He pretended not to notice the way his hand was trembling, taking his phone out of his pocket as he threw a hoodie over his head. 

"Where are you going at this time of night?" Kenma turned his head at the other questioningly. 

"I'll be back later...again, I'm really sorry," Akaashi stormed out of the room with another apology, going who knows where. 

Kenma let out a weary sigh into the pillow, "I hope he knows what he's doing." 

* * *

Akaashi felt restless, a shaky breath leaving his lips. He looked up from where he stood, looking up the stairs to where the entrance to the roof was. He stared down at the bottle in his hands, and opened it up. 

_"The effects will only last for one hour though, just one sip should do the trick."_

Reluctantly, he drank a single sip from the bottle just as Tendou had said. It didn't exactly have much taste to it, but that is something that he guess he should be grateful for. He stuffed the bottle in his hoodie pocket, and started climbing up. He opened the entrance, and right there before him, was the guy that he didn't realize he's been dying to see. 

"Akaashi!" Bokuto perked up, standing up abruptly from the bench when he noticed the other come out. 

Akaashi waved at him with an awkward hand, giving him a small smile. Bokuto jogged up to the other with a pair of chopsticks in his mouth.

"Bokuto-san," Akaashi greeted, and was ambushed by the other's arms as it wrapped around over his shoulders.

"Akaashiiiii," Bokuto mumbled, squeezing him so much that he felt his breath being taken away. Akaashi sighed, realizing that Bokuto wasn't going to let go any time soon. 

"I missed you too, Bokuto-san," Akaashi laughed, patting the other's back. 

As much as he wanted to hold him for a little longer, Akaashi had to be the first one to pull away.

"Were you eating ramen up here?" Akaashi asked, noting the chopsticks and cup of ramen Bokuto had as the two went to sit on the bench.

"I was, and then you called me up here and I had just finished making it," Bokuto poked around his ramen with his chopsticks, taking a mouthful of noodles, "Want some?"

Akaashi shook his head at his offer, reddening at the fact that he was willing to share his chopsticks. 

Maybe a few weeks ago, he would've said yes with no thoughts and let Bokuto feed him himself. As close as they were, now that Akaashi was realizing his own feelings, he has no idea how to act normal around Bokuto anymore. 

"I-It's okay, I'm good," Akaashi stammered, watching Bokuto take another bite, "I had dinner already with Kenma earlier."

"But it's beef flavored, your favorite," Bokuto insisted, holding up the cup and chopsticks towards Akaashi.

Akaashi swallowed the pulsating rise in his throat, taking the two from Bokuto and grabbed a chopstick full of noodles. Quickly, he downed the noodles and gave the cup right back into Bokuto's hands. 

Something caught his eye right then. 

Akaashi froze, his heart skipped a beat when he saw the all too familiar red string. And there it was, wrapped around Bokuto's pinky.

_That crazy red head really was telling the truth, huh?_

"Akaashi?" Bokuto called softly, his eyes never leaving that red thread as if it was going to disappear any moment, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Akaashi averted his eyes as he wiped his mouth, "Thanks, Bokuto-san." 

He felt shivers go down his body, and rubbed his hands together to keep warm from the cold wind. As he said almost a million times before, he'll say it again. 

He couldn't believe what he was seeing. 

After years and years of convincing himself that he never had a soulmate, the thread hugging around his pinky finger told him otherwise. 

He let out a short breath of amusement, wiggling his fingers a bit to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. 

_This...this is real. I have a thread, I have a_ soulmate _. A real soulmate._

_I'm really...connected to someone._

_What am I so worried about?_

While Bokuto kept talking, Akaashi's eyes gradually slipped from his pinky, and followed the red thread. Just like his mind, his eyes wandered as he finally realized that what that red head had said was in fact, true. 

The length of his thread didn't run long. It didn't drag on the floor like it did when he watched others' strings. 

Instead, he found his string attached to the one person he desperately wanted to be connected to. The first and only person he found himself falling for, the one who made the times they spend together feel like something that came out of a dream. 

"...and then Kuroo couldn't take teaching me anymore so he got Terushima to help me instead," Bokuto continued, snapping Akaashi awake from his thoughts. 

_Bokuto and I...are really...fated mates..._

"So anyways," Bokuto sighed, drinking up the last of his soup, "What have you been up to? Any projects you got finished yet?"

"Um...yeah, I think," Akaashi cleared his throat, shoving his hands in his pockets to avoid further distractions from this whole 'fate' thing, "But my real deadlines are coming up, and I _still_ don't have any idea what to do for my final for my actual art classes yet."

"Well, I'm sure you'll think of something," Bokuto hummed, tossing the empty cup of ramen and chopsticks into the nearest trashcan, "You just gotta get out of your pretty little head."

Akaashi hid a snicker behind his hand, sliding down against the bench as he stared up at the sky, "You think I'm pretty?"

Bokuto copied his actions, slouching against his seat as he looked up at the same stars, "Even without any make-up on."

"I don't wear make-up, Bokuto-san."

"Come on, haha! Even with clown make-up, you'd still look pretty," Bokuto added. He looked over to the side, and caught Akaashi trying to suppress his laugh behind his hand.

"Hey now!" Bokuto sat up, a smile growing bigger as he tried to look over at Akaashi's giggling face. When Akaashi faced away from him, he can feel Bokuto peering over him like a cheshire cat, waiting to pounce on him.

And pounced he did. Akaashi struggled to keep his hand over his mouth as Bokuto tried to pry it away. The two fought over each other, until Bokuto finally managed to pull Akaashi's hand off. 

When he did, Akaashi completely dissolved into a lighthearted, cheerful laughter. He sat up to prevent himself from falling off the bench, with Bokuto still holding onto his hand to stop him from covering it back up.

Just like some contagious disease, Bokuto laughed along just as loud as Akaashi, "See? You never admit it, but I know you think I'm funny."

"I can't tell when you're joking or not, you're terrible at jokes," Akaashi shook his head, finally calming down from his serotonin high. "I know you get me, but sometimes, I can never understand what you're trying to tell me."

_That's right,_ Akaashi thought.

_This guy was always finding a way to break down his walls, and every single time, he let him. No matter how much Akaashi tried to hide from him._

Bokuto sighed, resting his cheek against his fist. The two sat in silence, listening to the distant sounds of cars honking. 

While Akaashi was admiring the stars, Bokuto was admiring Akaashi.

He acted as if he didn't notice him staring at him with the most earnest expression on his face. Akaashi pushed down the booming sound of his heart beat, scared that it was so loud that Bokuto would be able to hear it. 

"Akaashi?" Bokuto lilted fondly, not breaking any sort of eye contact from him.

"What?"

"Why are you still letting me hold your hand?"

Bokuto lifted up his hand, and much to Akaashi's surprise, their fingers were still intertwined with one another. Bokuto squeezed his hand when he found Akaashi trying to wriggle from his grip, a hot blush creeping up his neck. 

Words can't describe how much Akaashi wanted to throw himself off of this ledge with embarrassment. 

"I don't know," Akaashi answered honestly, chewing his bottom lip, "This is your fault."

"How is this my fault?" Bokuto chuckled, waving their interlaced fingers in front of Akaashi. 

_This is so unlike me._

Akaashi had his future planned out in front of himself. He wanted to become an artist. Get his degree. Travel around the world wherever his inspiration goes. Set up his own shop, start up his own business. 

But ever since Bokuto came into his life, he felt like all those plans were changing. Not in a bad way.

Even when things start to get heavy in his life, Bokuto still found a way to bring back some sort of spark into it. The same way you'd strike a match right before you lit up a whole firecracker display on New Years as you watched the splash of colors explode into the sky, showering the dark night with scattered lights. 

Those words that kept replaying in his mind was what Akaashi wanted to say. It was what Akaashi wanted to tell Bokuto so desperately. To tell him that he wanted him to hold his hand longer. To turn their little "coffee hang outs" into dates. He wanted to be with him this Christmas, wondering what it's like to be kissed under a mistletoe.

_Is this really what falling in love means? Or...is there something more?_

"Hmm?" Bokuto teased, "How exactly is this my fault?"

"I wasn't like this before I met you," Akaashi admitted, squeezing Bokuto's hand right back. 

When he looked back at Bokuto, he saw the way his eyes stared right back at him. He looked right into them; they didn't widen in surprise, nor did they shine with amusement.

They just stared right back at him with a gentle expression on his face. They grabbed Akaashi's attention, just as they've always had. Bokuto looked like he was holding himself back from doing something, but at this moment, Akaashi wouldn't mind if he did. 

"You know what? Me too," Akaashi heard a little crack in Bokuto's voice, squeezing onto his slightly more slender hand. "My heart stops when you look at me."

Akaashi stared at the other like a deer in the headlights, not sure if he was mentally prepared for his answer. "What does that mean?"

Akaashi held his breath. He didn't realize how much closer Bokuto came, but he can feel the way his lips ghosted over the other. 

He can feel himself being pulled in by the other's warmth, trapped under the golden hue of his gaze.

"It means.." Bokuto broke into a soft whisper, never breaking eye contact from Akaashi's as he took let out a shaky breath.

"I want to be with you, Keiji Akaashi."

Everything around Akaashi felt like it just stopped. Any noises around him were cancelled out by all the yelling and shouting in his thoughts. 

Immediately, he felt his whole body falter, feeling like if he even blinked, this whole moment here would be gone in a flash as if this whole thing was just a dream. 

"Akaashi?"

_I should be happy._

Akaashi couldn't help but feel his heart well up with joy, feeling the urge to jump right into Bokuto's arms right here and now. 

_So why can't I move?_

At this point now, Akaashi was just starting to figure out what it means to fall in love. 

"Akaashi?"

Sure, he admits he wanted to be able to do all those things with Bokuto. He understood why people in relationships went on dates, held hands, kiss each other in public and make everyone who was single in a five meter radius stare at them with distaste. 

Even without the red string of fate, he suspected that he would've found himself in the same situation right here sooner or later. He probably felt this way as soon as he got his breath taken away by those golden eyes of his.

_What the hell is stopping him from doing all that with him right now, then?_

"Keiji."

Akaashi snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Bokuto call out his first name for the first time. He focused back on the other, who was gripping onto his hand tighter than before. 

"I-I'm sorry," Bokuto smiled apologetically, but Akaashi was close enough to see the tears brimming in his eyes. "I shouldn't have said anything. I wasn't even going to tell you, yet! I was going to say something at Kuroo's party, but I got ahead of myself! And I feel like, if I don't say something now, then nothing will happen, and I—"

"You're spiraling again, Bokuto-san," Akaashi reminded him calmly, ironically disregarding the alarming noises going off in his head, "I-I think I've been keeping you up so late right now that you're starting to say these things."

_What am I saying?_

"That's not true!" Bokuto insisted, holding his hand against his chest, "If I'm just saying this, I wouldn't be like this because of _you_ right now!"

Truthfully, Akaashi can feel the other's heartbeat speed up like a rabbit, probably just as quick as his was, maybe even more. A part of him was relieved at this gesture, more relieved at the fact that maybe Bokuto really _does_ mean what he was talking about.

But another part of him also knew that he didn't deserve to be the one to make him feel this way. 

"Look," Akaashi sighed confusingly, "Bokuto-san, I—"

"You can drop the formalities already, Akaashi, please," Bokuto cut him off, dropping his hold on his hand as he leaned away to back off of the other's personal space, "We've known and spent all this time with each other anyways. I've been wanting you to get rid of it for a while, ever since we met again, actually! But..it looked like you weren't going to unless I said anything."

Akaashi blinked at the other. Hesitantly, he opened his mouth. 

"B...Bokuto."

He felt the name roll easily off his tongue, and frankly, Akaashi did feel a little more natural saying it. He felt like he could say it ten more times in a row. 

Bokuto sighed with content, as if him just saying his name like this was the only thing that calmed him down. If saying his name like this makes him this happy, Akaashi made sure to take a mental note of it. 

"Listen," Bokuto pushed his bangs back with his free hand, letting the strands of his hair fall on his face, "I know you. You can be a little indecisive sometimes when it comes to putting your emotions and feelings into things."

He took hold onto one of Akaashi's hands again, "I know this "love" thing is something you're not used to, so this...is probably freaking you out right now."

"Bokuto," Akaashi shook his head, forcing himself to let go of Bokuto's hands, but the other wouldn't let him, "I can't—"

"Don't finish that. Unless you're saying, 'I can't wait to go out with you!', please...don't finish that," Bokuto sighed, strongly gripping onto the other, "Even if you have a little bit of feelings for me, I'll hold onto that. You can't tell me what you can't do if you haven't even tried."

"What if I said I didn't like you in that way?" Akaashi fiddled with his own fingers with his free hand, hearing his own voice quaver when he said that blatant lie.

"Then I'll stick by you until you do," Bokuto pursed his lips, his expression dropped into a serious look.

"How would you know if that's what I want?" Akaashi questioned, massaging his index with his thumb, "Don't you think you'd be a nuisance?"

"Do you think I'm being a nuisance?"

Akaashi whipped his head to the other, "That's not what I—!"

"You think I can't tell when you're nervous, Akaashi?" Bokuto swallowed, pointing his head towards Akaashi's thumb and index, "You have this cute little habit of playing with your fingers whenever you get anxious or nervous about something."

"Who said you're allowed to be people smart?" Akaashi mumbled, hiding his hand in the pocket of his hoodie.

"Who said you're allowed to dodge the question?" Bokuto smirked, finally letting go of Akaashi's hand. 

"I really care about you, so I'm not gonna force you or anything, that's the last thing I want." Bokuto stood up, brushing the front of his pants, "But right now, I don't regret telling you that I have feelings for you. You don't have to say anything right now...just please...think about it, at least?"

"I'll wait for your answer at Kuroo's party."

Akaashi sat there silently, and nodded. He stared at the ground as he heard Bokuto's steps begin to walk away.

"By the way—" Bokuto turned to him, tilting his head to the side with that cheeky grin that Akaashi had always loved seeing, "It's midnight now."

"Midnight?" Akaashi asked, raising a confused eyebrow up.

"It's December 5th," Bokuto let out a content sigh, taking one more look at the dark sky before setting his eyes right back at Akaashi, making the other want to melt right there on the spot when he said his next words.

"Happy Birthday, Keiji."

And with that, Bokuto left the roof. No warm bear hugs goodbye, no waving back goodbye, no lending jackets with a caffeine scent seeped into it. 

Just a simple "happy birthday," with a small, hopeful smile. 

And Akaashi felt like he was taking that part away from him. 

* * *

Bokuto wanted to drown. Indefinitely. Or throw himself in a bottomless pit, and let the earth swallow him whole. Yeah, yeah, that sounds a lot more better. 

Now this time, he could really tell that he was going to kiss him. 

_Screw that!_ He threw himself with his face in his pillow, hitting his bed with frustration. _I fucking confessed to him!_

Bokuto stared at the time on his phone, not surprised to see how late it was. His roommate Tanaka was dead asleep, even the sounds of Bokuto's muffled screams weren't enough to wake him up. 

"Shit..." Bokuto whispered into the pillow, shutting his eyes close in hopes that everything that he had said and done tonight was just a fever dream. 

But when he opened his eyes, still feeling that same feeling of dread he had before, he knew that this was real. 

The more he thought about it, the more he realized he never really tried being discreet about his feelings in the first place. 

The way Akaashi flustered at his words, how he was always so willing to talk his ear off about the most random things. He couldn't stop thinking about tonight either. 

_"You think I'm pretty?"_

_"I wasn't like this before I met you."_

_"What if I said I didn't like you in that way?"_

_"How would you know if that's what I want?"_

_"I missed you too, Bokuto-san."_

"If you really didn't," Bokuto grumbled, burying his face back into his pillow to muffle the sound of his words. "You would've left the moment you knew how I felt."

* * *

When Akaashi came back to the dorm, Kenma was already pass out asleep. He looked down, and sure enough, his string was gone after a while. Or at least, the effects of the drink Tendou gave him had worn out. 

He took out the drink from his hoodie pocket, and put it back next to the pair of scissors he kept on his desk. He sat down on his bed quietly, laying down as he stared at the blank space above him. 

_What the hell am I supposed to do?_

Akaashi hasn't felt this way since... _ever_. No one has ever confessed to him before, let alone fall in love in the first place. 

_Is this what you even call love? We've only known each other for months, that's barely even a year._

_Still..._

Akaashi knew deep down that if this feeling he has when he's around Bokuto isn't called love, he wouldn't know what else to call it.

But that's just it. 

He doesn't _want_ this feeling to be love. 

He doesn't know the first thing about being in love. He's seen too many people get hurt from this feeling, whether their strings were connected together or not. Especially with people who's threads aren't connect together. 

Specifically his parents.

The image of his smiling parents who he thought were living their happy ever after was just that. An image. 

Behind that was a whole new picture that Akaashi didn't want to accept. He's convinced himself his whole life that his parents were people who loved each other, that they _deserved_ to be each other's soulmate. That was why he didn't mind seeing the red string at all at first.

He should've known better whenever he saw his mother crying, and his father nowhere to be found. 

Akaashi couldn't care less about getting hurt himself. No, no...he doesn't care what happens if he gets hurt. 

It's _him_.

_Koutarou Bokuto._

He felt a twinge ache inside him at the thought of his name, remembering tonight's confession again. He curled up in his bed, taking his pillow in his arms as he hugged it close to his body for comfort. 

He doesn't want to hurt Bokuto. Ever. 

Akaashi accepted the fact that he fell in love with that smile of his. The way he seemed to brighten up the whole room just by walking in. He loved it when he calls out to him. He loved how he feels at ease whenever he's with him. 

_He loves him._

That's what Akaashi has accepted. 

_He loves him._

He peered over his desk, turning the lights back on as he got up to look over at his blank canvas. Akaashi sighed, silently apologizing to Kenma for any noises that might wake him up. 

He grabbed his apron, a clean paint palette, and for the first time in a while he knew exactly the kind of image he had in his mind right now that he wanted to create. Akaashi knew this for a fact as his brush touched the empty space of his canvas.

_I love him...which is why I can't hurt him._

* * *

_Am I making the right choice?_

Akaashi saw the puff of cold air when he let out an anxious breath. Final exams and projects were behind him, thus marking the first week of winter break. The snow falling decorated the sky with little snowflakes in the air. The doors he passed by already had wreaths and lights hung around. Just as Akaashi had promised, he stood outside of Kuroo's apartment, waiting for someone to answer the door.

"You came!" Kuroo exclaimed, opening the door wide for Akaashi to come in. 

The apartment welcomed Akaashi with its heated warmth, with some people already drinking and talking in Kuroo's living room. Kuroo went all out in decorating his apartment; stockings hung on the fireplace, lights hanged all around, and the Christmas tree glowing bright in the corner of the room. A few people started to dance as light music played from Kuroo's playlist.

He spotted some people that he's met before, like Oikawa and Terushima, drunkenly laughing with one another as Iwaizumi looked after him. He saw Tanaka, Bokuto's roommate who he met couple times, dancing around with this other short guy with dyed blonde bangs, being the two loudest in the room. 

"The place looks great, Kuroo-san," Akaashi said, taking off his jacket to reveal his long sleeved turtleneck, "Is Kenma here already?"

"He's playing Mario Kart over there with another friend and his friend he brought along," Kuroo pointed his head towards the living room TV, "They're third years at Karasuno. They've been screaming at each other the whole time."

Akaashi walked up to Kenma, and sure enough, he looked like he was enjoying himself while playing with the two high school third years. One of them had bright, orange hair while the other had dark hair matched with the same dark expression of concentration. 

"OH!" The orange haired one yelled happily, "I BEAT YOU, KAGEYAMA!" 

"HINATA BOKE!" The one called Kageyama yelled as he grabbed his collar, "YOU BLUE SHELLED ME!"

Hinata stuck his tongue out childishly, arguing with the other loudly as Kenma stared at the two entertainingly. 

Akaashi couldn't help it, but he smiled at the two younger ones' interactions with one another, so full of energy and fire. He glanced down and saw how the red thread that connect the two of them radiated together, just like they did, and decided to leave them be this way. 

_I think they'll be alright,_ Akaashi chuckled to himself. 

He heard the doorbell ring, and Kuroo called it saying he'll get it as he jogged up to the front.

"There's snacks and drinks in the kitchen if you want, Akaashi," Kuroo called over his shoulder.

Akaashi nodded and headed towards the kitchen, and sure enough, the table was covered with snacks, drinks, and non alcoholic drinks for the ones who were under-aged. Akaashi wasn't sure if he wanted to eat something yet tonight, so he just grabbed a cup full of water since he didn't really feel like getting drunk either. 

He stuffed one of his hands in his pocket, making sure the weight of the two objects were still there. 

He already made his decision. 

"Bokuto-saaaan!!!" He heard Hinata's voice yell from the living room. Akaashi whipped his head around so fast hearing the name.

"Hinata, hey!!" 

Hinata ran up to Bokuto, and Akaashi didn't realize just how short the former really was until Bokuto picked him up and carried him over his shoulders like a father would do to his son. Bokuto and Hinata cheered at one another, while Kageyama shouted at Hinata to get back down.

Akaashi took in that image right in front of him and laughed to himself. Right here. _This_ , right here, was _exactly_ the reason why Akaashi fell for him. 

Bokuto gets along with everybody he meets, and pulls them in with his smile and attitude without even knowing it. He is light. 

It's also the same reason why Akaashi doesn't want him to feel this way towards himself. 

Bokuto deserves to have someone who won't take away that smile of his. He doesn't want them to end up hurting each other, hating each other in the end. 

Bokuto finally let Hinata down, and the two chatted for a bit while Akaashi watched them from afar. He let out an amused puff of air when he noticed how impatient Kageyama waited for his friend, aggressively chugging down his glass of milk. 

"You're not going to go say hi?" 

Akaashi looked behind him, and saw Oikawa grabbing a few snacks from the table. He looked like he seemed to have sobered up a bit, though his cheeks were tinged red from the alcohol he's been drinking earlier.

"I haven't seen your cute ass around with Bokuto at the café recently," Oikawa noted, reaching over for different varieties of snacks. "Did you guys break up?"

Akaashi shook his head. "We weren't dating in the first place."

"Really? That's too bad for him then," Oikawa sighed, leaning over to throw an arm around Akaashi's shoulder, "He kept going on and on and on and _on_ about the cute artist guy he's been crushing on since forever! And it turned out to be you! Maybe fate really did bring you two together or some cheesy shit like that!"

_What does that mean? Fate, huh?_

"Maybe just go out with me instead!"

_Scratch that, Oikawa wasn't sober at the very least._

"What are you talking about?" Akaashi shifted uncomfortably to try to shake Oikawa off him when he started to use him to carry his weight, "I only met him this year, and aren't you going to make Iwaizumi-san mad if he finds you flirting with other guys?"

"Iwa-chan doesn't care about me!" Oikawa cried sloppily, slurring his words as he leaned his head against Akaashi's shoulder, "He's always saying mean stuff to me! And he's always hitting me! That's bullyism!"

Akaashi sighed, "I'm sure Iwaizumi-san likes you very much, Oikawa-san."

"How do you know?" Oikawa sniffled, wiping his nose with his free hand.

"I just know," Akaashi answered, finally removing Oikawa off his shoulder, "He just probably expresses it differently than you do. Or maybe he's just really bad at expressing it himself, so saying mean things and hitting you is just his way of saying he cares about you."

Oikawa puffed out his cheeks in a way that made Akaashi feel like he was consoling a child. "You think so?"

"Yeah, so you should go to him, now," Akaashi insisted, patting his arm for encouragement, "He's probably looking for you to bring those snacks to him."

"You're right!" Oikawa perked up, snacks in hand as he headed to the living room, "I'm coming, Iwa-chan!"

Akaashi spotted the red thread that connected the two as it grew smaller and smaller when Oikawa bumped into Iwaizumi. Akaashi slipped his jacket back on as he watched Iwaizumi yell at the taller man while Oikawa cried with the snacks in his hands like a kid being scolded by his mother. 

"'He's just really bad at expressing it himself,' huh?" 

Akaashi's eyes widened as he turned his head, seeing Bokuto leaning against the hallway. He felt the urge to fiddle with his fingers, distract himself, but he didn't want to show him how nervous he was.

"You could say Iwaizumi isn't the only person who's bad at expressing himself," Bokuto walked up the the other, standing in front of Akaashi like it was the most natural thing to do at the moment. 

"Hey," Bokuto smiled sheepishly with a rosy pink color on his cheeks.

"Hey," Akaashi replied, struggling to keep his voice from cracking.

It's only been a week and two days since Akaashi had last spoken to Bokuto on the rooftop on his birthday. Not that he's counting. 

Still, not seeing Bokuto for that long felt like they haven't met up with each other for years. 

Akaashi didn't know what else to say, shifting his gaze to the side as he distracted himself from the awkwardness between them with the snacks on the table. 

_This was exactly what he wanted to avoid._

"Do you want anything to drink?" Akaashi offered to Bokuto, trying to start up a conversation with him. 

"No thanks," Bokuto turned down, "Whatever happens tonight, I want to remember everything, so..."

"Right," Akaashi held onto the back of his neck, still averting his gaze from the other. 

"I'm not Medusa, y'know," Bokuto laughed, making Akaashi look up at him, "You're not gonna turn into stone if you're looking at me."

"I'm pretty sure Medusa looks a lot more better than you though," Akaashi bit back, earning a small smile from the other when they started to slip back into their casual conversation.

"Is it because of my hair?" Bokuto combed through his bangs with his fingers.

"Yes, it must be from all the gel that you used to put in it that made you look like an owl," Akaashi reached over to brush his hair hair with his own hand teasingly, until he realized what he was doing. He stopped in midair, putting his hand back down to his side. 

"Come on! I stopped using that stuff for you!" Bokuto pouted.

"For me?"

"Yeah, you said you liked it better with my hair down."

"N-No," Akaashi stuttered, hiding his embarrassment as he drank a sip from his cup, "I never said that."

"Yes, you did," Bokuto smirked, "On the roof, remember?"

Akaashi's memory stumbled a bit, reminiscing the first time Bokuto had took him on the roof. 

"Yeah," Akaashi tried to hide a smile, but to no avail. He set his drink on the table, "Listen, um.. about what you said last time—"

Bokuto hummed at the other, taking Akaashi's free hand, "Let's talk outside."

With no hesitation, Bokuto walked off to the balcony of Kuroo's apartment, with Akaashi following behind him willingly. He relished in the warmth Bokuto's hands gave him when he held his. 

He shook his head at the thought. He shoved his other hand to hold onto the scissors in his pocket, taunting him, reminding him.

Once the two were outside, Akaashi and Bokuto moved toward a spot on the balcony away from prying eyes inside the apartment, shutting the door closed behind them. The music from inside was loud enough for them to hear, muffled from the outside. 

Bokuto leaned over the ledge, looking up at the stars like it was just the two of them on their dorm's roof.

"It's starting to snow more," Bokuto marveled happily at the little frost in the air, "It's starting to look a lot more like Christmas too."

"Yeah..." Akaashi agreed behind him. 

Quickly, he took the bottle from his pocket, slowly opening the cap. He took one sip from it, and hurriedly sneaked it back in his pocket before the other could notice. 

"I never really like Christmas as a kid," Akaashi admitted, joining Bokuto to lean against the balcony ledge.

"What?!" Bokuto turned to the other with a surprised look, "Why not?!"

Akaashi shrugged. "I never really spent it the way kids were supposed to spend it with their families. While other kids got toy trains from their parents, mine were yelling at each other to decide who's going to give me a gift."

Bokuto pursed his lips. "That...must've been hard."

"I guess," Akaashi scoffed at the thought, "Looking back on it, I'm sure at one point they loved each other. Long before they split up, I mean. I love my mother, but there were times when I wished that I was someone else's child for a moment."

Akaashi sat on the thought, smiling down sadly at particularly nothing. 

_If I was someone else's child, maybe I wouldn't have been cursed with this ability to see the red string of fate._

He knew that there was nothing he could do for that. 

"But," Bokuto said, looking down at Akaashi with a caring smile, "I'm glad you didn't let your parents bring you down."

"Yeah?"

Bokuto sighed, looking into Akaashi's eyes with the most earnest smile. "You're still you, and that's enough, right?" 

Akaashi struggled to look away from that beaming expression of Bokuto's. 

_Please don't make that face._ Akaashi felt his heart ache, feeling the scissors in his pocket...

_I won't be able to do this if you smile at me like that._

"I guess you could say that," Akaashi answered. He looked down, and saw the red string appearing before him on his pinky. Hesitantly, he picked it up with his finger, feeling the thin thread of the string emit a soft red glow.

_So this is what it really looks like..._

"If anything," Bokuto twiddled his thumbs around together, "I'll make you say that you love Christmas this year, I promise that!"

Akaashi scoffed amusingly with a small grin. "Promise?"

"Yeah, promise!" Bokuto held his arm out of the ledge, trying to catch the snowflakes in the palm of his hand, "I'll even make you say you love me too!"

Akaashi froze at Bokuto's declaration, trying to ignore the butterflies fluttering in his stomach. He watched the other smiled brightly as the snow melted in his hand. 

Moments like these are what Akaashi loved the most. 

The moments he and Bokuto shared together privately like this. Akaashi doesn't want to _lose_ this. He enjoyed admiring Bokuto closely like this, and he'd be _damned_ if he ever does anything to mess it up.

He reached inside his pocket, feeling the cold metal of the scissors. He took it out, swallowing the lump in his throat. He really was the only one who could see it when Bokuto didn't say anything about it. 

"Hey, Akaashi?"

Akaashi's attention shifted up, seeing Bokuto almost close the distance between the two. His face was inches away from his own, feeling the warm breath on his cheeks. His eyes flitted over Akaashi's face with a small smile.

"Do you believe in fate?"

"I think you've been hanging around Oikawa too much," Akaashi paused. "Is that supposed to be another pick up line?"

"I'm serious," Bokuto laughed softly, "Is it so crazy to think fate brought us together?"

Akaashi rubbed the thread between his thumb and index. "I think the coffee shop you work at brought us together."

"I get it. You're anxious," Bokuto backed away from the other, "I am too. I am the one holding onto this hope that there really is something between you and me."

Akaashi almost dropped the scissors in his hand, "What do you mean—"

"I don't want to lose you again."

Akaashi's hold on the scissors started to tremble. 

"Bokuto..."

He took a few steps back, keeping his distance away to keep himself from giving Bokuto any more false hope. Akaashi stayed silent, picking up the string that connected their souls together. 

_I can't._

"I said I won't force anything on you, Akaashi, so you don't have the be scared." Bokuto continued, not moving an inch from where he stood. "But I want you to be honest with me, you could at least give me that."

_The only reason you feel this way is because of this string._

"I..I know," Akaashi let out a shaky breath, steadily opening the scissor blades apart. He wanted to blame the snow for the way his hands shook. The more he unfastened the scissors, the more overwhelmed he felt by his own emotions. 

Bokuto noticed the way Akaashi looked unnaturally unstable. Slowly, he walked up to him, holding onto his shoulders to bring him back from his thoughts. 

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Bokuto reassured him, squeezing onto his shoulders, "I'm not going anywhere, even if you reject me right now."

Akaashi chewed on his lip, bringing the scissors closer to the string, "I-I know..."

_"Make sure you look him in the eyes when you do, or the string won't cut."_

"I'll wait for you no matter what it takes."

The soft lilt in Bokuto's voice was almost enough for Akaashi to drop the scissors in his hand and bury himself in the nook of his neck, forgetting anything and everything that his thoughts have been haunting him with for the past couple weeks. 

_I've made my decision._

"Bokuto..I'm.."

Akaashi choked back on his words, slamming against his throat, preventing him from saying anything else. He felt the air collapse around him, burying him under the weight of the anxiety he had.

"Akaashi, look at me."

Akaashi felt Bokuto's hand lifting his chin, his head raising up until he found himself locked under the gaze of those passionate, golden eyes staring back at him. He saw the protective look in Bokuto's eyes, never letting go of his grasp on him.

_This will be the last time you look at me like this._

His hand started to waver as Akaashi brought the blades of the scissors closer to the string. It was like there was weight inside him at the pinpoint of a drop zone. 

Slowly, he started to bring the blades closer together.

"I want you to look me in the eyes," Bokuto smiled fondly, slowly bring the hand he held on his chin over to his cheek, cradling Akaashi's face under his intense gaze. Akaashi felt his mind stutter, nuzzling under his touch like it was the only thing that mattered. 

"I just want to cherish you."

_Snip._

Akaashi felt like he lost his voice, feeling something deep inside his chest snap. Nothing in Bokuto's expression changed, but Akaashi knew that it soon will when he felt his half of the string fall against his hand. 

"I'm sorry..." 

Neither of them moved away from the other, nor did they say anything. Akaashi dropped his hands at his sides, barely feeling any strength to hold onto the scissors anymore. 

This is for the best, he kept telling himself. His eyes shifted to the ground, drowning in the silence that he created between the two. He saw the way his red thread dangled in the air. Not connected to anything, not connected to anyone. 

Then he saw something wet drop from the ground. 

Akaashi thought it might have started to rain. But when he looked back up, he saw the last thing that he ever wanted to see. 

Bokuto took away the hands that he was holding him with. To his own surprise, he touched his own cheeks, feeling the tears streak down his face with no sobs following after. 

"I-I'm sorry, I-I don't know why—" Bokuto hiccupped, quickly wiping the tears falling from his eyes. "I can't stop—"

Akaashi wanted to reach out to him, hold him as he dried the teardrops from his face. 

But he himself felt his vision start to blur as his eyes started to well up on their own. 

His heart _dropped_. All the emotions and feelings he's been holding, all the pain from hurting himself with all these thoughts started to overwhelm him more as he tried to blink away the tears threatening to fall. It felt like the stabbing pain in the center of his core came out of nowhere, strangling his throat from the inside. He felt like choking out sobs from the throbbing aches in his chest...but nothing came out. 

He brought this onto himself. 

"Akaashi.." Bokuto called his name, "You're.."

"I gotta go," Akaashi quickly stuck the scissors back in his pocket, rubbing his eyes with his sleeves as he walked away from the other.

He felt something grab onto the hem of his jacket, turning around to see Bokuto staring back at him with nonstop tears falling. 

"Please..don't leave..." 

It took everything in Akaashi to not look him in the eye. He couldn't face Bokuto this way, not now, not when the aftermath of cutting their red thread was still in effect. 

Not after Akaashi was the one who chose to cut it in the first place.

"I can't stay," Akaashi heard the crack in his own voice, but he didn't care about composure anymore. He didn't want to stay here any longer after hurting Bokuto this much. 

_You won't even remember why you were hurting in the first place, sooner or later._

Akaashi pulled away from Bokuto, not looking back as he called out his name.

"Keiji..." 

Akaashi turned back once more, seeing Bokuto staring at the ground with one hand clutching the fabric around his chest.

"Why..." Bokuto let out a broken laugh. "I don't know why it hurts so much, Akaashi."

Akaashi felt his tears starting to take over his vision again. 

"Don't cry," he forced a smile, hand frozen on the door, "I like it better when you cry when you're happy."

Akaashi turned around quickly to open the door back inside. His cold body was met with the heat inside the apartment, mixed in with the music blasting in his ears. He hurriedly speed walked passed people, ignoring anyone who called his name. His hands were quivering vigorously, forcing himself to shove that feeling of dread coursing through his body deep down. He bumped into someone, losing his balance for a bit what with his mind already feeling so muddled. 

"I'm sorry!" He heard someone say, and Akaashi realized it was that orange haired kid he saw earlier, "Hey, are you—"

"Sorry," Akaashi uttered as he averted his eyes from him, knowing that if he stopped walking now, he'll start crying again. 

He hurried out of the front door, shielding himself from the snow as he started to pick up the pace. Soon, he found himself going faster, and faster, until he was running one foot after the other. He felt the snow dip underneath his shoes, running as fast as he can from all the pain he brought onto himself. 

_This is for the best,_ he repeated in his mind.

_I did the right thing._

_I did the right thing._

_I did the right thing._

Akaashi didn't realize how far he ran until he reached the entrance of his dorm building. He walked in, taking his time to go up the stairs instead of the elevator in hopes of clearing his head. 

It did not.

It wasn't that late, but the building was a lot quieter than usual with everyone going on trips for the break. Akaashi didn't really have anywhere to go, so he figured he'd stay in the dorms. 

His floor was even quieter. Akaashi felt a hint of loneliness when he saw all the Christmas lights and decorations that were hung around. He feel stupid for even feeling this way for a second, all these thoughts starting to weigh him down, when everything was _his_ fault.

He missed not knowing that his soul was connected to Bokuto. He missed the thought of neither one of them having their fates decided already. He missed being around Bokuto like it was just the two of them against the world. 

Guess there really is such thing as bliss in ignorance. 

Soon though, everything will go back to normal once this all blows over. 

Akaashi looked down at his pinky, and he could almost see the effects of the string start to wear out as it faded from his finger. 

_What is even normal?_

Once he reached his room, he thought maybe a warm shower would be good enough to clear his head. But when he opened his door and turned on the lights, something caught his eye.

_A present?_

Akaashi removed his jacket on his chair, picking up the gift sitting absently on his bed. It was a small box wrapped with snowman wrapping paper, with the words _"Happy Birthday Akaashi"_ written neatly on the side, finished with a pretty red ribbon on top. 

_A birthday present?_

It wasn't there when he left for Kuroo's party, and the only person who had access to his room was Kenma. He set the box down aside, thinking Kenma must have bought it for him as a birthday/Christmas gift in one. Normally he'd open his birthday presents on the day of Christmas for that specific reason. 

Not thinking much of it, Akaashi sighed, grabbing his towel and a change of clothes to the shower. 

It was almost near midnight by the time Akaashi finished showering. His eyes were still feel puffy from the crying earlier, but until he starts to feel better, he had to distract himself from it all with a few holiday movies. 

After a couple rounds of watching, Akaashi was starting to feel a little emotional lift from his shoulders in the midst of his distractions. Cozied up in his blanket, a warm cup of milk in his hands, and lights dimmed down so that he could focus on nothing but the screen in front of him.

But that only lasted for a brief moment.

It was almost 2 AM, and being an art student in college, it was still considered too early for Akaashi to feel tired. He heard the sound of someone's footsteps outside, and paused real quick when he noticed the sound of jingling keys opening the dorm room. 

Kenma sighed as he tossed his keys on his bed and took off his hoodie. 

"Really, _Elf?"_

"It brings me joy," Akaashi longed, watching the scene where Buddy starts covering the whole store with handmade Christmas decorations.

"Really now?" Kenma peeked over the screen, looking through his drawers for pajamas to change in. "Because I happen to know that there's another happy, loud, dimwitted idiot who also seemed to bring you joy."

Akaashi froze for a second, reaching over for the remote to pause the movie. "You heard?"

"Not much," Kenma answered nonchalantly, "Kuroo told me how Bokuto was crying on the balcony, and I saw you leave early. Knowing you guys, it wasn't hard to put two and two together."

Akaashi felt another headache starting to take over again, rubbing his temples in guilt.

"I guess you rejected him in the end, huh?"

"More or less."

"Is it gonna be awkward now?"

Akaashi thought for second, thinking about how tomorrow Bokuto won't even have a _reason_ to feel awkward anymore. If he did exactly as Tendou instructed, their emotional ties together are already cut, and Bokuto will start to forget all these romantic feelings he's been harboring for him. 

There's no reason for him feel awkward.

"No," Akaashi shook his head, "This will all blow over in a week."

"That's a shame," Kenma hummed, and Akaashi noticed the look of disappointment in his eyes at his response, "I was really rooting for the two of you."

Kenma left it at that, leaving the room to shower right when Akaashi stopped him for a brief second.

"By the way," Akaashi turned his body, reaching over for the gift on his bed, "Thanks for the present."

"Umm.." Kenma tilted his head confusingly, "It wasn't me."

With that, Kenma left the room. Akaashi furrowed his brows, staring down at the gift in his hands confusingly. He stood back up, sitting down on his bed with the present on his lap. 

From the corner of his eye, he saw something slip from under his pillow. 

He reached over for it, seeing that it was a note.

Slowly, Akaashi opened the note, his heart heavy with the idea of knowing whom this present might be from.

_HEY AKAASHI !!_

_I finally got your present, but I wanted to surprise you so I had Kuroo steal Kenma's keys >:D_

_Think of this as a way of me being with you no matter where you are. I..._ _  
_

Akaashi read and reread Bokuto's note over and over again until he had every word engraved in his head. His head fell to this hands, tears brimming his eyes again as he felt a hiccup escape his throat. All the feelings he's been pushing down tonight wanted to burst. A sob wanted to choke out, but he couldn't hear anything from himself while his insides felt like it was skewered with a thousand needles. 

_Did I really do the right thing?_

If his past self was looking at him now, what would he say? He'd probably think how pathetic he turned out to be, being so afraid of loving someone he went as far as to cutting the red string of fate himself to rid these feelings. 

Except he'll be the only one suffering from these feelings, while Bokuto will have no recollection of his. 

_Stop crying._

It's too late to regret anything now. He's gotten this far, and he wanted nothing more than to get rid this pain growing in the pit of his stomach. 

_You brought this onto yourself._

Akaashi put the present and note together on his desk. He shut off the TV, and climbed onto bed with his covers up all the way to his head. He turned his back away from Kenma's bed. 

He didn't want him to see the way his eyes rolled tears in his sleep, muffling the sounds of his hiccupped breaths into his blanket. He didn't want anyone to see how pathetic he became. 

_Hmm_...Akaashi sighed, thinking ironically right before he drifted off to sleep.

_I guess it's true what they say. Like mother, like son..._

* * *

Akaashi woke up the next morning, his hair disheveled and his face stained with dry tears. His eyes looked red, but nothing like a putting a cold spoon over it to reduce the puffiness won't fix.

He'd rather not walk around looking like he spent the night crying in his sleep, no matter how true that was. 

It was officially the start of winter break. Kenma was still sleeping, and it was almost 8 AM. Akaashi combed through his hair with his fingers, reaching for his phone to see any texts from—

_Oh. Right._

**_No new messages._ **

_Figures,_ Akaashi thought, remembering the events from last night. He can still feel the heavy feeling he held, but it wasn't bothering him as much as it was before. 

Still, that doesn't mean it hurt any less.

He climbed out of bed, getting ready to start the day. After freshening up, he slipped on a warm hoodie, a beanie, and joggers. He checked his phone, and still, no new messages from Bokuto.

_Why do I keep..._

He noticed the jacket he hung on his chair last night, and thought that it was time to do laundry. Since everyone on his floor practically left for the holidays already, there wouldn't be much people in the laundry room right now. 

He threw that jacket into his hamper along with his other clothes, and carried it outside quietly, careful not to make any noises while Kenma slept. He trudged in his slides, holding the hamper in his arms as he made is way through to the laundry room. As expected, it was left empty. 

He started to unload his clothes, one by one. Just as he was about to put his jacket in, he realized he left the scissors and bottle in the pockets. 

Akaashi searched through the pockets, sighing in relief when he found that Tendou's scissors was still in there. 

Touching the scissors now gave him a cold feeling, reminding him of every action he made with this. He shoved that feeling in the back of his mind, stuffing the scissors into his joggers.

He searched the other pockets, hoping to find the bottle next in one of them. 

Nothing. 

Panic started to rise in his chest. Akaashi double checked, triple checked the jacket pockets again. Maybe it fell inside his hamper? He tossed the jacket in the washer, searching through his dirty clothes as he put them into the wash after. 

Still nothing. 

_Where did it go? When did it fall out?_

_Calm down, calm down._..Akaashi told himself, starting the wash _. It's probably still in the dorm..._

"Looking for something?"

Akaashi froze in his tracks, knowing exactly who's voice it was just by the shivers that went through his body right now. He looked over his shoulders, seeing the bright smile back on Bokuto's face staring down at him as if nothing from last night hadn't happened. 

"Just...I think I dropped something," Akaashi muttered, quickly shifting his attention from Bokuto to his hamper.

"Is it this?" Bokuto asked, tossing something into Akaashi's hamper so that he would catch it in his sight. There, he saw a bottle of liquid that was already half drunken, Akaashi's leftover clothes cushioning its fall.

"This—" Akaashi reached for the bottle, "Did you drink from it??"

"You dropped it when you left the party last night!" Bokuto pouted, wondering why Akaashi was getting upset, "It's just juice, isn't it? Shouldn't you throw that out?"

"That's not...you didn't drink from it, right?" Akaashi asked once more, praying to god that he didn't take even a _sip_ from this. 

Who knows how messy this will get if Bokuto starts seeing the red strings of fate for even just a second. 

"Relax, bro," Bokuto laughed, patting his back with all his strength, "I didn't drink any of your special juice."

"Haha, very funny," Akaashi said sarcastically, stuffing the bottle into his other pocket.

_This...isn't much different. At least they can still talk to each other normally now, that's a good sign, right?_

It was then Akaashi noticed something different about Bokuto.

"You put your hair back up?"

"Huh?" Bokuto hummed, touching the tips of his spiked up hair, "Oh yeah! I thought I ran out of gel for it, but turns out I just stopped using it for a while."

Akaashi felt his heart drop. He didn't think how a simple thing like that would hurt. 

"Did you get home alright, last night?" Akaashi asked to change the subject, starting the wash cycle as he watched Bokuto's reflection against the glass of the washer. 

"Yeah, it's weird though," Bokuto scratched the back of his head, eyebrows furrowed together, "I know I spent like half the night drinking, but it's almost like I'm forgetting something important happened or something."

"Oh yeah?" Akaashi expected this, and continued, "Like what?"

"I can't exactly point it out...but the last thing I remembered was that I was crying outside for some reason?" Bokuto thought hard, humming loudly as if it was going to help him recollect his memories. "Man, I must have been really hammered! I couldn't remember what we were talking about on the balcony before you left." 

Akaashi chuckled bitterly, walking with Bokuto out of the laundry room, "We were just talking about how much you missed playing volleyball, then you started bursting into tears like a baby."

"Hey, no fair!" Bokuto called, throwing an arm over Akaashi's shoulder. "If I remember correctly, you were also a victim to being a crybaby!"

Akaashi almost felt himself stutter under Bokuto's warmth against his own, worried that if he got any closer, he'd be able to notice. "Who me?"

_Yeah...nothing here really changed._

"Yeah!" Bokuto smiled from ear to ear, scratching his cheek, "Damn, we gotta man up if we wanna get ourselves a couple of dates for Kuroo's Christmas party when he comes back from Kenma's!"

_Oh yeah...that's right._

"Dates?"

_He's not in love with me anymore._

"It's always been a dream of mine kissing someone under the mistletoe," Bokuto daydreamed excitedly, lifting his arm away from Akaashi as he imitated what it'd be like, "You think I should ask that cute blond that visits the café?"

_I can't_ stand _listening to this...but..._

"Is trying to hook up with other people all you think about?" Akaashi grumbled, a part of him wanting to snap inside at the slight thought of having this conversation with him.

"It's just one date, Akaashi. What are you getting upset for?" Bokuto poked at him, "This is the first time I'm talking to you about something like this."

He was right. As much as Bokuto talked a lot, Akaashi remembers every conversation he had with him. 

And not a single one of them was about wanting to date other people. 

Akaashi slapped himself mentally. _You have no right to act this way,_ stop _it._

"You're right," Akaashi sighed, swallowing his pride, "But I never really thought of you as the type to worry about trivial things as a date."

"Since when did you ever considered a simple date 'trivial'?" Bokuto nudged at him, and the two found themselves walking out of the dorm building.

"I just never really understood it," Akaashi frowned at the ground, not minding the twisting feeling in the pit of his stomach, thinking about the way Bokuto used to look at him.

"What's this?" Bokuto peered over at Akaashi amusingly with a smirk, "Has the great Keiji Akaashi never fallen in love before?"

Akaashi looked up hesitantly, feeling his heart start to warm his body up despite cold morning air.

"Just...once."

"Oya?" Bokuto raised a brow, a playful smile taking over his expression curiously, "And who's the heartbreaker that caught this emotionless king's heart?"

"He's just...someone," Akaashi answered, lifting the hood over his head, "The problem was that...I loved him so much, I had to let him go."

"So it's like that, huh?" Bokuto sighed, patting the other's back consolingly.

"There's no harm in falling in love, man," Bokuto encouraged, admiring the snowflakes that fell on the ground they walked on. "You should let yourself be happy with whoever makes you happy, right?"

Akaashi nodded, shutting his eyes closed tight to stop before any tears could fall. 

"Cheer up, no point in being sad over it now!" Bokuto picked up his pace, "The café is just up ahead. Maybe Oikawa's willing to take you on a date since he's always making passes at you, even last night."

_So he really doesn't remember a thing about having feelings for me, does he?_ Akaashi thought, shaking his head as he followed the other behind his steps.

_This..is supposed to make things easier for me. This was what I wanted..._

_Wasn't it?_

"Thanks, but..." Akaashi answered, keeping his gaze straight on the ground, "Oikawa isn't really my type."

_There's no harm in falling in love..._

_As long as no one gets hurt._

* * *

Akaashi reveled in the warmth of the café followed by the thick scent of coffee beans. Only a couple days had passed since that night, and Akaashi was only just starting to get used to the way things are going to be from now on. 

Two days was enough for Akaashi to notice the difference in Bokuto's behavior around him now that he cut the string that tied them together. 

For one thing, they started to run into each other less and less. They used to meet up every morning, and stayed up together at night either sending each other texts or watching a movie online together. He would wait for Bokuto every time he had work at the bench in the park when they first met, then the two would walk to the café together. They would even sneak out at nights to spend time together on the rooftop like they were teenagers, talking and laughing until the sun came up with the pretty colors of the sunrise that never cease to amaze Akaashi.

It wasn't that he missed the little moments. 

He missed the feeling the two of them shared in those moments.

_Did all that really happened...just because we were tied together by some red thread?_

_At what point was our entire relationship entirely depended on fate?_

Akaashi stared blankly at his sketchbook, grimacing at his way of thinking. 

_I don't like this._

"Here you go, Akaashi," A cup of coffee was set in front of him, pulling him away from his thoughts.

He looked up, and thanked Bokuto with barely a small smile. The other didn't even bother to stick around him longer than needed. During his breaks, at least Bokuto came to keep Akaashi company for a bit, but he ended up complaining about the job or how whiny Oikawa gets with Iwaizumi.

In all honesty, Akaashi didn't mind in the slightest. He felt lucky that Bokuto didn't leave him behind completely. Aside from all those selfish feelings Akaashi kept locked inside, he was grateful that it was only his emotional ties that were cut off, not their entire dynamic together. 

He didn't want to lose Bokuto any more than he already had. 

He heard someone jingle the entrance open, which Akaashi found a bit odd since there was not many people on campus. 

"Hinata!!" Bokuto perked up, waving towards the small ball of energy coming towards the two.

"Bokuto-san!" Hinata bounced his way to the table, "So this is where you work, huh?"

"Yup!" Bokuto said, ending the 'p' with a small pop, "You waiting for Kageyama?"

"We're gonna check out the campus together!" Hinata smiled widely.

Looking at how the two interacted, Akaashi couldn't help but think that he was dealing with a mini Bokuto, another ray of sunshine coming in and lighting up the room. 

"I gotta get back to work, but tell Kageyama I said hey, hey!" Bokuto ruffled Hinata's hair, shooting another smile at Akaashi that made his stomach want to do all sorts of flips. 

Bokuto left the two, and Akaashi immediately felt awkward being alone with the younger man. He hadn't forgotten who he last ran into at the party that just happened not even a few nights ago.

"Sooooo..." Hinata mumbled, sitting down on the seat across from him, "You're Akaashi-san, right?"

"Yes," Akaashi nodded, hugging the cup of his coffee with both hands, "Hinata-kun?"

"Just Hinata is fine," Hinata laughed, twiddling his thumbs together.

The two sat in an awkward silence. As much as Akaashi didn't want to interact with the other, he knew it was rude to just up and leave the guy behind. 

"Are...Are you okay?"

Akaashi snapped his eyes up at the other. He was told he always had this intense look in his eyes, but it was something natural that he can't control it sometimes. This he remembered, when it looked like the color drained from Hinata's face. 

"I-I-I was just curious!" Hinata looked down, focusing on his own hands, "I just thought...something bad happened between you and Bokuto-san."

Akaashi softened his look, like he was trying hard not scare a deer away. 

"What makes you think that?"

"Well..." Hinata's eyes shifted from the table to the side, sneaking a quick glance from said worker. 

"Bokuto-san talked about you to me all the time," Hinata started to relax, releasing the tension he was holding in his hands, "But from the way he's acting right now...seeing him with you now..it doesn't..."

"Fit your expectations?"

"You can say that," Hinata laughed nervously, "Kuroo-san and Oikawa-san had their theories, but I didn't want to hear it from anyone unless Bokuto-san says so himself, or you."

Akaashi smiled sadly, taking a quick sip from his coffee. "We didn't fight."

"You didn't?" Hinata looked almost relieved. "But then...why are you guys like this then? Don't you guys...you know..."

Akaashi raised an eyebrow, and Hinata had to lean over the table to reach his ear.

"Like-like each other?"

"'Like-like'? What's with that?" Akaashi chuckled at the younger one's innocence in his words.

"But don't you?"

"I do..." Akaashi sighed, feeling a whole emotional weight lift from his shoulders just from admitting it out loud. He relished in the feeling of it, but it still didn't get rid of that knot in his stomach.

"But it's not like anything good will happen if we ever got together, even if he does feel the same way," Akaashi chewed at his lip, shifting his gaze to the person who always seemed to occupy his mind. 

"Even if we were connected by the red string of fate," Akaashi thought bitterly, clutching his grip around his coffee, "It wouldn't have worked out."

Hinata tilted his head to the side in confusion. "Why not?"

"Let's just say.." Akaashi shrugged, taking another sip from his coffee, "I'm not...I don't really know...how to love someone the right way."

He doesn't know why he was opening up to Hinata all of a sudden, but he felt at ease telling someone about what's been going on in his mind. 

"What does that matter?"

Akaashi looked up, giving Hinata a questioning look. 

"I mean..." Hinata cleared his throat, scrunching his nose in a small pout that really reminded Akaashi of Bokuto's habits. 

"Is there really one way to love someone?" 

Akaashi took a moment to register the other's words considerately. "How do I know if my way won't end up hurting the other?"

"I guess you don't really know," Hinata answered, tapping one side of his cheek, "But you could take that chance."

"Chance?"

"People always told me I was too short to play volleyball, that even dreaming about being on the national team wasn't my destiny, and that just made me feel all _guh_ ," Hinata smiled, swinging his hand over his head, "But I went _whapam!_ Here I am! The past three years, I proved them wrong, doing quicks with Kageyama that go like _whoosh!_ and _bam!_ And soon, we're both going to become a part of Japan's national team together!"

_Guh? Whoosh? Weirdo quicks?_ Akaashi wasn't sure what exactly Hinata was trying to say, but he knew that when this kid dreams, he dreams _big_.

Hinata probably caught on Akaashi's confused expression, but only laughed lightly as if that was the normal reaction he often gets.

"What I mean is," Hinata continued, sitting back in his seat, "Why should you worry what others think to the point it stops you from what your heart wants?"

Akaashi was taken aback by Hinata's question, surprised to see just how perceptive he was. It was if he was looking right through him without even knowing it. All his feelings, all this conflict he's been keeping inside him, all the struggle he put himself through.

He looked over at Bokuto again, watching him as he started to play around with latte art. He could see the frustration in his brows, but his concentration outweighed it. Once it seemed like he got it, Bokuto let out a shout in triumph, excitingly punching his fist at the air in victory. 

Akaashi let out a small laugh, swirling the cup in his hands as what's leftover inside circled around. With that laugh, he felt like all of that just rolled off the curves of his shoulders and fall into a feeling of shame. 

Maybe not shame, exactly. But after what Hinata said, Akaashi just felt silly.

He felt regret.

"Have you ever been in love, Hinata?" Akaashi asked with interest, "You seem like you know a lot about this type of stuff."

Immediately, Hinata's color drained from his face, bursting with a crimson red expression.

"M-M-M-Me?? L-Love? Never, never, never!" Hinata quickly stammered, shaking his head vehemently. "I'm just putting things in volleyball since that's the only thing I understand!!"

"I see," Akaashi smiled calmly, amused at the knowledge of what he knows. 

"I-It's just—!" Hinata stuttered, waving his hands hysterically, "Sometimes, you just gotta stop and smell the flowers!"

Akaashi felt his heart pang at Hinata's simple, yet familiar words. He wasn't sure why exactly, but he felt like he heard that somewhere before. 

The two sat quietly as Hinata looked like he was trying to calm himself down, but it wasn't that same awkward silence from earlier. 

And after their talk, Akaashi had a clearer understanding of everything. 

But does that change anything?

At that moment, another ring from the entrance jingled, and Akaashi recognized the incoming customer as the other third year he saw playing Mario Kart with Hinata and Kenma. Kageyama, if he recalled correctly. 

He must have a naturally scary expression on his face, because that's what he had on when he approached Hinata.

"Oi," Kageyama grumbled, grabbing onto the head of the other, "Who's this?"

"Kageyama!" Hinata yelped, jolting up from his seat, "Finally! You know how long I was waiting for you?"

Akaashi smirked at the way Kageyama averted his eyes away from Hinata, feigning irritation behind a small frown. He couldn't help but entertain himself by the way the two bickered, but even so, the red threads that connected the two of them never failed to burn bright like fire. 

"It was nice talking to you, Akaashi-san!" Hinata waved, leaving the café with Kageyama following just behind him. 

"I'll see you later, Hinata," Akaashi nodded, "And thank you."

* * *

"Dammit! Hinata forgot his drink," Bokuto pouted, coming up to the table with the latte he's been working on, "Kageyama came and swooped in for him so quick."

"If it wasn't so obvious, he kept staring at me like a feral dog trying to protect his territory," Akaashi snickered, finished the rest of his cup of coffee in one sip.

Bokuto laughed, setting the latte down. Akaashi peeked over at the art, impressed to see the steamed milk and mocha forming the shape of a volleyball. 

"I'm about to end my shift, anyways," Bokuto sighed, taking the cup back, "I'll just give this to my coworker since she's still gonna be here."

Akaashi nodded, watching Bokuto's back as the other disappeared into the backroom. 

_What the hell do I do know?_

Akaashi fidgeted with his cup, hanging his head down with a sigh. 

_Isn't it too late to do anything now?_

_The string is cut. Bokuto's feelings for me are gone. And mine are still..._

"Akaashi!" 

He stood up from him seat, stuffing the sketchbook he almost forgot about into his bag. "Ready to go?"

Bokuto perked up a smile, "Yeah! Let's go!"

The two of them left the café together, walking into the snow to do whatever they wanted to do.

"Wanna watch a movie at my place?" Bokuto asked nonchalantly, walking in front of Akaashi as they crossed the street together. 

"Sure," Akaashi said, pulling onto his beanie further down. "But you have terrible taste in films, Bokuto."

Bokuto exasperated a gasp, "Say it ain't so, Akaashi!" 

Akaashi said nothing else as Bokuto whined to him, arguing how all the movies he chose when they watched together were all classics. Still, no matter what he was saying, Akaashi found himself smiling at him by the end of it all. He continued teasing the other, just as he always had, a spark of hope of their normal almost returning to them. 

Almost.

What now? 

He doesn't want to leave things the way they are now...but is it really too late for him to change anything?

_"I guess you don't really know, but you could take that chance."_

Akaashi bit the inside of his lip. Is taking a chance really all it takes?

_"Why do you think some people might not be so fond of the idea of having a fated mate?"_

He looked up in front of him, his eyes meeting the back of Bokuto's head. Bokuto must have felt something staring at him, because he turned around just as he did with a confused look. "You still coming or what?"

_"I don't really know how to love someone the right way."_

_"What does that matter?"_

Akaashi smiled knowingly. The thread he broke, he needed to find a way to fix.

No, not fix the thread exactly. But he understood now where his feelings lie.

"I'm picking the movie," Akaashi answered, as the two of them entered their dorm building together. 

_I just want to cherish you._

* * *

Akaashi's been acting weird lately. 

Maybe Bokuto didn't realize it before, but Akaashi's been distancing himself a lot more recently. They just got to his dorm, and he realized that the other guy has been getting more lost in thought than usual. 

Or maybe, he's just been imagining at how close they actually became these past few months. He thought that maybe they were just starting to get comfortable around each other.

_Maybe something did happen between the two of them at the party? Did they fight?_

Bokuto looked down over from his bed at Akaashi sitting on the floor, searching through his DVDs to search for the movie he was looking for. 

"Your DVDs are more organized," Akaashi said, separating them into piles.

"Kuroo actually fixed them for me a couple weeks ago," Bokuto explained, shifting in his bed to lay down on his stomach. "You haven't been coming over much since then."

"Yeah," Akaashi only answered with a neutral expression, "I've just been busy."

_Liar,_ Bokuto knew, laying his head on the crook of his arms.

For some reason, Bokuto knew Akaashi wasn't the only one who has been acting weird. He can't pinpoint exactly what's been bothering him, but he can't ignore it either. And he has a feeling that it has something to do with Akaashi.

Something definitely happened.

Bokuto realized this when the two were at the café earlier. 

While he was working on his latter art for Hinata, he noticed the two talking together. Every time he snuck a glance at their table, he thought, _when did they get so close? Has Akaashi always been able to smile like that? What was Hinata so flustered about?_

"Hey, Akaashi?"

"Hmm?"

Bokuto turned over on his back, having his head hang back on his bed. "What were you and Hinata talking about at the café?"

"Huh?" Akaashi whipped his head towards the other, "Why do you want to know?"

_Shoot! Was I too obvious?_

"Just wondering how you two hit it off so well," Bokuto answered honestly, "You guys are complete opposites."

"So are we, Bokuto, but we're still friends, aren't we?" Akaashi turned back to looking through the DVDs, hiding whatever expression he was making.

_'Friends,' huh?_

Bokuto stayed quiet for a bit, patiently waiting for Akaashi to answer his question. A part of him knew it was none of his business, but another part of him was just so _curious_ to know what happened. When it looked like Akaashi wasn't going to say anything else, he asked him again. 

"If you really want to know," Akaashi sighed, the tone in his voice still remained indifferent, "We were just talking about our first love, in a way."

"How did that come up?" Bokuto wondered, starting to become more intrigued by the topic.

"I guess Hinata was the one who brought it up," Akaashi shrugged, still not looking his way, "He asked me if I, quote, 'like-liked someone.'"

"And?" Bokuto slowly smiled amusingly, "What did you say?"

Akaashi stayed silent for a moment, neither looking away from the DVDs in his hands nor making any noises in hesitation. Bokuto leaned in more forwards, as if like if he was closer than he could get some kind of answer out of the other. 

_Why do I care so much?_

"I said that I did."

Bokuto widened his eyes, falling off from the edge of his bed and onto the ground. Akaashi turned his head in surprise, and Bokuto brushed it off, looking up at the other questioningly. 

"You do?!"

"Y-Yeah," Akaashi admitted, a tint of a pink color starting to brighten in his neutral expression.

Bokuto leaned more towards the other on impulse. "Who??"

Akaashi looked away, covering part of his face with his arm. "Like I'll tell you!" 

Bokuto felt slightly hurt from Akaashi's immediate refusal, but doesn't go to push it any further. But...he wondered if the slightly hurt feeling that he got was only because of that reason, or if it was something else. 

Because right when Akaashi said he had feelings for someone, all Bokuto felt was a sudden sharp feeling in his chest.

Still, he kept running through all the images of everyone Akaashi has interacted with or talked about, ever so curious to know who could it be. 

He couldn't identify the sinking feeling in his stomach when he started to connect the dots in realization. He may not be all that smart like Kuroo, but he still has a good memory when it comes to Akaashi. 

"Is it..." Bokuto asked once more, "Is it the same guy you were talking about before? When we were at the laundry room?"

Bokuto regretted what he asked as soon as he said it, because he can feel the atmosphere around Akaashi changed. He watched as Akaashi put all the DVDs he didn't put in the pile back where they belong, inserting one of the disks into the player. 

"Yeah," Akaashi answered, Bokuto catching a small hint of hesitation in his voice. "It's the same guy." 

Bokuto laid on the ground wordlessly, angling his head from the TV to the back of Akaashi's head, "I thought you said you had to let him go."

Akaashi pressed a few buttons on the remote, standing up from his spot to back away from the screen. He sat right beside where Bokuto lay, fast forwarding all the random videos until it got to the main screen. 

"I did let him go," Akaashi sighed heavily, his voice laced with a sense of longing that Bokuto has never heard from the other before.

"But I never said I stopped loving him."

Bokuto felt a pang in his heart when he said that. He thought that maybe he felt sympathetic of his friend, but when he labeled that feeling as 'sympathy,' it didn't quite feel right. 

Deep down, he felt like there was a voice screaming at him inside, begging to come out.

He wanted to keep searching for it. He wanted figure out this part of himself and his feelings. He wanted to know more from Akaashi. But at the same time, he had no idea what were the right words to respond to something like this.

Except...

"Does it hurt?"

Bokuto wasn't sure if this was the right thing to say. Hell, he was sure this was more of an inconsiderate thing for him to say, but it was too late to take it back now.

Akaashi looked down at Bokuto confusingly. "Does what hurt?"

Bokuto tipped his head up at the other, making sure he was staring right at him in the eyes. He felt his chest tighten at the thought of saying his next words. But he managed to slip them out, unconsciously dreading that thought of how he was going to react to Akaashi's response. 

"Not being able to be with him." Bokuto replied calmly, "Does it hurt?"

Unexpectedly, he saw the corners of Akaashi's mouth turn into a small smile. Though, there was something sad behind that expression.

_"So much."_

Bokuto was surprised to hear the small crack in Akaashi's voice when he answered. He shifted his gaze back to the TV, pressing the play button as the movie opened with a familiar, light Christmas music.

_What kind of person did this guy have to be for Akaashi to have that look on his face?_

They didn't say anything to each other for a moment after that. Just sitting through the credits in silence made Bokuto feel awkward. 

But what made him feel more out of place, was the realization of the feeling that he had when he saw the expression Akaashi wore when he was talking about his first love. 

_Jealousy._

He didn't know the meaning behind this hidden feeling, nor does he want to. 

At least, not right now. 

Because right now, he didn't feel lost. He can't really explain properly. He felt that this moment right now felt familiar to him, a feeling that he knew made him happy. 

He looked over up at Akaashi, wondering if it was possible that this feeling he has right now was because of him.

"What are you looking at?" Akaashi noticed the other staring, eyes flicking from the screen to Bokuto, then back to the TV.

"Really?" Bokuto teased, turning his body to one side and leaned on his arm, _"Elf?"_

"What's wrong with _Elf?"_

Bokuto laughed. "Didn't Kenma catch you watching this movie like seven times already this month?"

"It makes me happy," Akaashi simply replied.

"Why?"

"I don't know," Akaashi shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

"I guess Buddy reminds me of someone I care about."

* * *

_How long has it been since they spent time together alone like this?_

Bokuto doesn't know how many movies they've watched already, but they're only halfway through the pile of films that Akaashi had picked out. He looked around the room, noticing the mess of snacks on the floor that had gradually progressed one after the other. Some of it were just wrappers and bags of chips crumpled up on the ground in one pile, the other was littered popcorn from when Bokuto decided to throw some at Akaashi's face.

Out the window, the sky was starting to get darker. Neither of them had left Bokuto's dorm unless it was either to go to the bathroom or to grab snacks. 

He felt comfortable like this. 

Bokuto looked over his shoulder to tell Akaashi a quick joke about the movie, until he saw the other passed out sitting up with his head resting against his bed. 

_He fell asleep already?_ Bokuto chuckled to himself, laying back down to his comfortable position on the floor. _He really is like a baby._

He decided to watch the rest of the movie himself, and let Akaashi sleep just like that. 

_Was that a little drool he saw?_ Bokuto thought as he turned his head a little to check, seeing a small line of saliva from the other's lips. _He really does look like the younger one here at times like this._

"Not my bed," Bokuto laughed again, careful not to wake the other. 

In all actuality, Bokuto didn't mind one bit. Akaashi snored softly as he watched the small rise and fall of his back from his breathing. He wondered if he should wake up the other now so he wouldn't get a crick in his neck, but Bokuto himself was beginning to feel tired. 

_I wonder, when was it..._

He relaxed his head on the crook of his elbow, a heavy feeling of exhaustion starting to overcome his body. The sounds from the movie started to muffle in the background, and he can feel his eyes struggling to keep open. 

He recognized this feeling of content, like that feeling he would get as a kid whenever he fell asleep on the couch, and his parents would bring him to his room when he woke up and thought he could teleport. 

Bokuto admits he may be an idiot...but he's not stupid. 

He knew that Akaashi gave him that same feeling. The feeling that he was able to do anything. 

As he drifted off to sleep, his mind subconsciously wandered about what it was about Akaashi that made him always want to stick by him. 

When was it that they started to become close? Why was it that Bokuto wanted to become friends with Akaashi in the first place? 

When was it that he decided to hide the fact that he's known Akaashi longer than Akaashi has known him?

And why was Akaashi keeping secrets from him now?

He guess he should be the last person to ask that. He doesn't even remember why he kept it a secret that he's met Akaashi long before Akaashi met him.

With all these questions in his head, he drifted off to sleep with a dream right after. It wasn't anything that comforted him exactly, nor was it something deep within his subconscious to haunt him. 

It was just...a memory. 

The first time he met Akaashi.

* * *

_It was Bokuto's first year of college. He was just starting to get used to all the insane amount of workload, and not being able to see his friends as often as he used to._

_"Oi!" He heard someone call his name, and he looked up to see the one and only Kuroo Tetsurou waving his hand in the air. "Run faster or I'll leave you behind!"_

_Bokuto picked up the pace, and ran all the way across the parking lot to Kuroo's car. He leaned against the car door of the shotgun seat as he caught his breath._

_"Come on, we don't wanna be late," Kuroo hurried, opening the door to sit in the driver's seat._ _Bokuto followed the other, throwing his bag in the back seat as he climbed in shotgun._

_"Relax, bro," Bokuto said as he fastened his seat belt, "We'll get there like an hour right before your boyfriend's game."_

_"Can you blame me, it's Kenma!" Kuroo stuck his tongue out, looking back as he pulled out of his parking spot, "And is it wrong for me to be this excited??"_

_"Well.." Bokuto snuck a peek in the back one more time, spotting Kuroo's mountain of cheering gear that he would always bring to every game his old high school, Nekoma, played._

_This was the first time that he was tagging along, since they'll be playing against his old high school, Fukurodani._

_"I feel like it's been forever since I saw the little guy," Bokuto played around with the radio, finding a good station to set the mood of how hyped the two were._

_"Maybe we should start looking for a lover for you too, huh?" Kuroo teased._

_"As if I need help from you," Bokuto huffed, "It took you more than three years to confess to Kenma!"_

_"Our brain is gonna crush your guys," Kuroo claimed proudly, turning to Bokuto with a smirk when they stopped at a red light._

_"Is what you keep telling yourself with disillusion after my team destroys yours," Bokuto shot back, earning a competitive glare from the other._

_"Ah! This brings back memories!" Kuroo broke into laughter, moving the car forward again once the light turned green._

_The two spent the rest of the car ride to Nekoma scream singing out songs that played on the radio. By the time they got there, they entered the gym to see both Nekoma and Fukurodani teams warming up already._

_When the two teams spotted their alumni, they have already started to crowd them with greetings and hugs._

_"Bokuto! Kuroo! It's been a while!"_

_They exchanged a few words with each other and laughed for old times sake. Afterwards, they went to the stands, wishing both their teams good luck. The game was starting soon, and it was filled with either students, friends, and families coming over to support their teams._

_After twenty minutes into the first game, Bokuto had to use the restroom. He told Kuroo he'd be right back, and left the gym to find it._

_Shoot...where was it?_

_Bokuto hadn't been to Nekoma a lot, mostly just to meet up with Kuroo at the gym to hang out. He looked over at the signs of every room he passed by, hoping to find it._

_He noticed a room where the door was cracked open just a little bit. He looked around the empty halls, wondering if a teacher might've left the door open by accident or something. His curiosity taking over, he backtracked in his steps, looking through the window of the door to peek through to see if there was anyone inside._

_With one look, he figured that this was probably an art room what with all the paints and drawings plastered on the walls. White sheets with paint spattered all over covered the ground, and canvas stands were folded and stacked together. His eyes trailed across the room, and that's when he saw him._

_Bokuto didn't know a thing about art. But if there's one thing, it's that whatever this person was creating was_ magical _. Each stroke was precise, every color contrasting with one another. H_ _e could see the hard work that was put into it, all the time and effort spent on it was not overlooked._

_It was breathtaking._

_But what was more breathtaking, or rather who, was the artist at work who had created it._

_At first, Bokuto couldn't see anything except for the back of his head. An artist apron wrapped around his waist as he held onto a paint palette with one hand, and a brush in the other. The room was quiet, quiet enough for Bokuto to hear him steady his breathing whenever he made contact with the canvas._

_But when the artist turned around, Bokuto saw him. And for a moment, he felt like he forgot where he was, what he was doing._

_He could tell that the other guy was a lot more slender than him, but he still had an athletic build. He had messy black hair, and part of his face was covered with paint marks. He almost had an emotionless expression on his face, but his thick brows were parted with concentration._

_Just watching him at work was enough to captivate Bokuto._

_He observed as the pretty stranger looked over his shoulder, and walked up to one of the shelves that carried the paint buckets. He reached over for the red paint bucket, struggling to reach it as he tippy toed and stretched his arms out._

_As much as Bokuto wanted to help him, he didn't want to frighten the other. Also, he couldn't help but hold in a laugh at the way he just found this so cute as the guy started to jump to reach the bucket._

_That was, until Bokuto completely forgot about how the door was already slightly opened, and stumbled right in the midst of his laughter._

_Bokuto disrupted the silent atmosphere, and he heard the small yelp of surprise followed by a loud sound of paint splashing all over the floor._

_"Ah—" He heard the other cry out, covering his hand over his head when the bucket fell, spilling all of its bright red contents all over him._

_"I am_ so _sorry!" Bokuto panicked, running up to the other guy as he kept his eyes closed. "I didn't mean to get paint all over you!"_

_"It's fine," The artist said surprisingly calmly, which made Bokuto feel even more guilty. The guy was covered from head to toe with red paint, keeping his eyes shut closed to prevent the paint from getting in. "I gotta wash this off before it dries."_

_"Here, let me help you," Bokuto ignored the way his shoes stepped into the stickiness of the paint on the floor, holding onto the other for support, "Do you need to wash off in the restroom?"_

_"I don't want to drip paint all the way there," he sighed, and pointed over to the other side of the room, "Just the sink over there will do. I gotta keep my eyes closed for a while so I won't damage it."_

_Bokuto mumbled a quick confirmation, guiding the other across the room so he wouldn't trip over anything. Once they reached the sink, he started to wash off the paint from his skin first, with Bokuto awkwardly standing beside him as he reached for the paper towels._

_"Here, the paper towels are right next to you," Bokuto offered._

_"Thanks," The artist kept his eyes closed as he continued to get rid of the red paint from his hair. "What are you doing here anyways? Do you go to Nekoma as well?"_

_"No, no! I graduated from Fukurodani last year," Bokuto scratched the back of his head nervously._

_"Ahh, so you came for the volleyball game tonight?" The artist spoke in a casual, low voice._

_Bokuto figured he must be one of the quiet types, making him feel a lot more awkward since he was the exact opposite._

_"I'm...really sorry. I was looking for the restroom, then I got lost. Then I saw you..." Bokuto stammered, "Y-You're painting there, I mean, and just...wow."_

_"I'm not that good," The other guy mumbled sheepishly, "To be honest, I'm under a lot of pressure right now, what with this being my last year and trying to figure out what to do."_

_"Oh?" Bokuto didn't expect the other to be the type to keep talking more than necessary, but he wasn't complaining. "Have you figured out what you want to do?"_

_"What I want to do?" The artist wondered, running his head under the sink as water matted his hair down. "I'm...not really sure."_

_Bokuto hummed in understanding, wetting a paper towel to wash off the paint from the other's arm, "Well, time comes when you gotta make a decision."_

_The other guy tensed under him, and he could tell that if he could open his eyes right now, he'd be giving him a death glare with whatever colored eyes he had._

_"What I'm saying is," Bokuto chuckled, setting the paper towels down, "If you spend your life worrying about what might happen, you'll miss the chance to live it the way you want to."_

_"Strong words coming from the guy who turned me into a lava man," Bokuto heard the other guy huff in amusement, a small smile hidden under the water running over his head._

_"That's because I've been where you've been," Bokuto winced slightly, but smiled as he reminisced his high school glory days. "Sometimes you just gotta stop and smell the flowers, or something like that."_

_The Nekoma student hummed in consideration, red streaks keep coming off from his head._

_"Do you miss it?" He asked, ruffling his hair through with his hands._

_Bokuto raised a brow, "Miss what?"_

_"All of this?"_

_"High school?" Bokuto guessed, immediately falling into rambling mode, "Of course! You know how much of a powerful ace and captain I was!? I was one of top five aces in the country!"_

_The pretty stranger hummed impressively, "You must've been really amazing then."_

_"Yeah, I was. Still..." Bokuto laugh started to die down. He scratched the back of his head, "After years of all that, it all went away so fast. Now I'm not the ace anymore. I'm just...me."_

_Bokuto stood quiet at that realization. It's not like he didn't like where he was right now, studying and working hard to become a person who can help other kids like him, with dreams of becoming a star in a sport they love._

_He just missed the feeling he gets when he was in the center of the court._

_"Is that a bad thing?"_

_Bokuto's thoughts snapped back to the other, "What do you mean?"_

_"You being you," He answered simply, "What's wrong with you being just you? Just because you're not a famous ace anymore doesn't make you any less insignificant."_

_He stopped the faucet from running water a bit, but Bokuto can still see the red residue of paint that still coated his strands._

_"From what you just told me," The artist turned to his direction slightly, still keeping his head down as the water dripped from his hair, "A_ _ccepting chances comes with change, don't you think?"_

_"So just make sure you don't regret the changes you took."_

_Bokuto stared at the other with an admiration. He watched as the artist turned the faucet on again, getting rid of more of the excess paint that just seemed to never stop._

_The two of them fell silent as they took each other's words into consideration. Bokuto felt a buzz in his pocket, and saw Kuroo calling him._

_"Yo!" Bokuto answered._

_"Where the hell are you??" Kuroo shouted over the phone along with dozens of other people's voices screaming over him, "Nekoma won the first game, stupid! They're gonna start the second one soon, and I wanna see the look on your face when your team loses!"_

_"Fine, fine, I'll be right there!"_

_"YEAHHH!" He heard Kuroo cheer, "THAT'S MY FUCKING BOYFR—"_

_Bokuto hung up before he heard anything else, while the other guy was still rinsing himself._

_"I gotta go, my friend will leave me here if I stay any longer," Bokuto bit back another apology, slowly backing away from the other._

_"It's okay," was all that the artist responded with, and still, Bokuto didn't know what else to say or do. He wanted to stay longer. He wanted him to at least know what he looked like, but it seemed like he wasn't going to leave anytime soon._

_Bokuto sighed, turning back around as he walked away._

_"By the way," Bokuto heard behind him, turning around quick to see the other still facing the sink._

_"Thank you," he sighed, "I still have a lot of things to figure out myself, but what you said to me earlier..."_

_He looked up to where Bokuto was. His eyes were still closed shut, but he caught the corners of his mouth turn up in a small, thin smile. "I guess I really needed someone to say that to me, so thank you."_

_Bokuto caught his breath, feeling a sensation of heat shot up his neck and across his cheeks. He gripped on his phone for a little to regain his composure, shifting his gaze to the side as he rubbed the back of his neck to ease away that questioning warmth in his chest._

_"Anything for my kouhai. Besides, you helped me out a bit too, believe it or not," Bokuto laughed, stepping away as he placed his hand on the door to leave._

_"I'll see you around."_

* * *

Bokuto woke up in a cold sweat, jolting up slightly. He looked around the room, noticing how much cleaner it was. All the wrappers and bags were gone, and it looked like someone had vacuumed the room too. 

"Jeez," He heard someone say, looking up to see Akaashi coming back into the room, "What a pigsty."

"Who you callin' a pig?" Bokuto replied sleepily, adjusting his eyes to the light in his room. He saw how completely dark it was outside. "What time is it?"

"It's almost one in the morning," Akaashi answered, "Sorry, I should get going. I accidentally fell asleep, but I cleaned up the place a bit."

'A bit' he said, but Bokuto can clearly tell the difference from now compared to just before he fell asleep. "Where are you going?"

"Back to my dorm," Akaashi slipped into his jacket, "I've gotta wake up early tomorrow and pick up my art project final."

Bokuto's eyes lit up with excitement, "Let me come with you! You never told me what you did for your final!"

Akaashi shook his head a bit, picking at the zipper as his gaze shifted aside, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not? Kuroo isn't here, and I'll have no one to hang out with tomorrow!" Bokuto pleaded with his eyes, clasping his hands together, "Pleeeeaaase?"

He watched as the other looked hesitant, contemplating.

"Fine, but no complaining," Akaashi cracked, and Bokuto pumped his fist in the air excitedly. 

Akaashi sighed, giving the other a small smile. "I gotta go now."

"Wait—!"

Bokuto called after the other, stopping him in his tracks. Akaashi paused, waiting to see what he wanted.

_Shoot! I gotta say something I gotta say something I gotta say something—_

"Wanna spend the night?"

_Why did you say something?!_

All Bokuto wanted to do was clear the air between the two of them, and ask Akaashi what's been going on with him lately. Because having to remember all that all of a sudden, is giving him some sort of sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach.

No, not sickening. 

_Missing._

He still felt like a piece of him was missing, and he was tired of ignoring it. And after that dream, he was _sure_ that Akaashi had something to do with it.

Because when he dreamt about him...Bokuto felt at ease.

"Spend the night?" Akaashi repeated, looking anywhere around the room but at Bokuto. 

"Sorry, never mind," Bokuto chuckled nervously, sitting down on his bed, "I just...I just wanted to talk to you."

"Sure."

"You don't have to—wait what?"

Bokuto did a double take, not expecting the other to agree with him so quickly. "Really??"

"Didn't you say you wanted to talk to me?" Akaashi started to remove his jacket back off from one shoulder, "Or should I just go?"

"No, no! You can stay!" Bokuto scampered across the room, guiding Akaashi to Tanaka's bed, "You can sleep on Tanaka's bed since he went home for the holidays."

"I should shower still," Akaashi frowned, standing awkwardly next to Tanaka's bed.

"Here, you can borrow my clothes!" Bokuto rushed to his drawers, searching through his clothes to find some that would fit Akaashi.

"N-no, that's okay—"

"It almost two in the morning," Bokuto cut him off, tossing a clean plain T-shirt, pajama pants, and a pair of boxers at the other, "You really wanna go all the way upstairs?"

Akaashi stared down at Bokuto's clothes he caught, mouth gaped at him. "I guess...I'll be right back." 

_Why am I feeling so excited?_

Bokuto laughed at the awkward looking way Akaashi walked with his clothes in his hands, leaving the room to go find the shower. 

He decided that he should take one too, and grabbed another pair of clean clothes for himself. He left his dorm, and made his way to find the other vacant bathroom. 

_Was I ever this happy whenever Kuroo slept over? Even in high school, I never felt like this. What makes this time feel so different?_

_Augh! I must be out of my mind._

Maybe a hot shower would clear his mind a bit... 

It did not. 

Once Bokuto finished, he found Akaashi in his room, sitting on Tanaka's bed, wearing _his_ clothes.

"I don't remember that shirt being so big," Bokuto hummed, hand flying to cover his mouth when he realized he said that out loud instead of in his head. 

Akaashi flushed red with embarrassment at Bokuto's comment, clearly understanding the fact that what he was wearing was basically a size bigger than him.

"It's not my fault you're built like a hefty dorito chip," Akaashi muttered, purposely loud enough for Bokuto to here.

"A do—" Bokuto gasped in defense, "A dorito chi—!"

They stopped to glare at each other for a moment. Bokuto stuck out his lips in a pout, while Akaashi furrowed his brows at him. At the same time, they both dropped their gaze, breaking into a small laugh enough for just the two of them to hear.

"So," Akaashi started as Bokuto plopped onto his own bed, "What did you wanna talk about?"

"Oh, that..." Bokuto felt hesitant now, not knowing exactly where to start.

"Are we...okay?"

Akaashi's head turned to him. "What?"

"I'm not trying to be weird or anything," Bokuto laid down on his pillow on his side, facing Akaashi, "But if I'm being honest, I feel like you're being a lot more distant than usual."

"If you put it that way..." Akaashi copied him, laying down in the same position on Tanaka's bed to face Bokuto, "I guess I have been."

"Did I do something wrong?" Bokuto spoke in a low voice, worried if he said anything before that might have upset Akaashi.

"Not at all," Akaashi shook his head, and Bokuto could just tell that the smile he was giving him was a sad one. "I just had a lot on my mind."

"Like what?"

Akaashi stayed silent, picking at the sheets dejectedly as if he was avoiding the questions.

"Akaashi, you can tell me anything," Bokuto encouraged, leaning over his bed to dim the lights down a bit. "You always know I'm here for you as your friend."

He saw Akaashi visibly wince at his response, his frown deepening even more. 

"You're right," Akaashi barely managed to say out loud, grabbing the hem of the blanket over his body. He turned over to his other side, and Bokuto tried to ignore the slight hurt in his chest when he did that. 

"Don't worry about it, Bokuto," Akaashi tried to reassure him, "You're my best friend, after all. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, alright?"

Bokuto sighed in relief, but at the same time, a hint of an aching pain still remained when he shut off the lights completely and turned in his bed.

_Liar._

_There really is something, isn't there?_

Bokuto closed his eyes, sleeping in a position where his hands were reaching out, almost as if they were longing for something. 

_You don't look me in the eyes when you lie._

* * *

_Since when was I so...complying?_

Akaashi noticed how _terrible_ he was trying to act normal around Bokuto as if nothing happened. He actually agreed to stay the night, _and_ was now borrowing Bokuto's clothes to wear as the two of them strolled their way to the art building?

Who _is_ he? 

"It's on the fifth floor," Akaashi guided the two of them into the elevator, right after Bokuto took some time to admire some of the artwork that was displayed behind the glass.

Akaashi realize what he was doing was unfair to himself, but this was something that he deserved. He really was an indecisive person. Cutting the string of fate with Bokuto one minute, and then wanting to be together with him in the next. 

_How selfish,_ he thought.

Sometimes, he'd catch himself thinking about how to fix things, if that was even possible. The only problem is...

_Is it really fair for Bokuto?_

That was another thing that Akaashi didn't like about the string of fate. Not knowing if those feelings that Bokuto had were actually his feelings, or if they were part of the effects of the red string. 

_If those feelings were so easily forgotten after splitting the thread, did Bokuto really ever love him?_

These were the kinds of question Akaashi was afraid to find the answer to. 

"Come on!" Bokuto hopped off the elevator excitedly, "Show me what you made, Akaashi!"

Akaashi laughed at the other's enthusiasm, stepping off the elevator to lead them to his classroom. They passed some other art students who also came by to pick up their work, and Bokuto was marveled by every one of them. 

They finally reached his classroom, and Akaashi could already feel his pulse racing, wondering what Bokuto's reaction would be when he saw what exactly he painted. 

_Well, I've already made it this far._

They entered the room together, and Bokuto admired around like a kid going into a candy store for the first time. It was his first time going in, but obviously not Akaashi's, so he was a little more indifferent.

"Ahh, Akaashi-kun! There you are," His professor called him when he spotted his student, "Yours is over there."

"Thank you, professor," Akaashi thanked properly, walking up to his portrait to take it off the wall.

As much as Akaashi wanted to hide this from Bokuto, there was no use to it. As soon as he grabbed it, Bokuto appeared over his shoulder out of thin air. 

"Can I see it?" 

Quickly, Akaashi turned the canvas away from the other. He hugged the portrait carefully against his body, despite it almost being three times bigger than a regular canvas, clearly hiding it away from Bokuto. 

Seeing it now reminded him exactly why he was so adamant about not letting Bokuto come with him in the first place, but didn't regret it until now. 

"Hey!" Bokuto followed after him when Akaashi swiftly walked out of the room, "Mean Akaashi! You said you'd show it to me!"

Akaashi shook his head, refusing to stop walking from the sheer embarrassment that was waiting to happen if Bokuto even catches a glimpse of this painting. A part of him wanted to bury himself six feet under a pile a snow and catch hypothermia than let him look.

But there was an even bigger part of him that was begging Akaashi to take this small chance, to see if showing Bokuto this will change anything. That part of him _wanted_ to show him. 

Akaashi paused in his tracks, sighing in defeat as Bokuto finally caught up to the other. 

Bokuto waited patiently, slightly bouncing in anticipation of what finally inspired Akaashi to paint. Slowly, Akaashi handed the canvas over to Bokuto, revealing his artwork that showcased the person that he loves. 

Right in front of the person he loves.

Akaashi looked down for a moment, looking at his own painting upside down. He can still remember the countless hours of sleep he missed working on this, all the coffee he downed, all the paints he's used, and how many times he almost woke up Kenma just because he kept moving around this one canvas. He couldn't find it in himself to shut his eyes when he began this portrait, it was like his body was on autopilot, led by his heart's content.

Right there, that huge portrait in his hands, was the very memory that Akaashi would describe as a moment that was very precious to him. It was a moment that was engraved in his head ever since he first experienced it.

"This was..." Bokuto stared at the portrait with wide, wondrous eyes, taking in every single detail, shade, and complexion that Akaashi had spent hours working on.

"Is this me?"

Akaashi looked up at the other, nodding up at him with a small smile, "Yeah."

"This was when I took you to the roof for the first time, right?" Bokuto laughed, tracing his fingers over the fine lines and splashes of color. "I guess you really like sunrises, huh?"

"I guess you could say that," Akaashi chuckled, looking over at the painting once more. 

It's been a while since he felt this way about something he created. Every time his brush touched the canvas, he felt his feelings bubbling up in his throat, threatening to break him down into tears. Every time he had to remind himself of that memory to paint it, he felt every stinging pain in his chest.

But at the same time, that very moment with Bokuto was soothing to him. The feelings he had up on that roof was something that Akaashi never wanted to forget.

He even hoped, somehow, that Bokuto didn't forget either.

"Is this a red string?"

Akaashi whipped his head to Bokuto, slight panic arise when he realized the other was pointing at the painting. He calmed himself down, almost forgetting that he had added that red thread to the portrait.

Even though he never saw it yet that night, Akaashi grew fond of the fact that his string has always been there the whole time.

"Yeah," Akaashi replied, feeling a lot more softhearted about how Bokuto was able to point it out. "I just felt like it was missing something."

Bokuto sighed happily, running his fingers along the picture of the red string until it ran off the canvas. "You think it's connected to anybody?"

Akaashi felt his stomach twist sharply at his question, ignoring that familiar sinking feeling he gets whenever the topic of fate comes up. "You believe in that sort of stuff?"

"Not really. But if it were the case," Bokuto pulled the portrait back a bit to gaze at the bigger picture of it all. Akaashi watched the way his golden eyes glowed brighter at his canvas, completely unknownst to him what the other could be thinking behind that expression.

Bokuto tilted his head to the side, tracing the red string again with his eyes. "It's nice to know that you have someone waiting for you in the other end of the string, isn't it?"

Just now, Akaashi would give anything to hear those words earlier at any point in his life. 

When he heard that, he felt like all the missing pieces in the puzzle of the red thread mysteries just fell into place with that simple thought.

He wondered how different things would've turned out if someone just told him this instead of dealing with this gift and curse all by himself.

"You can have it," Akaashi smiled, earning a gaped expression from the other.

"Really??" Bokuto's smile widened even more than Akaashi expected, holding the canvas against his waist, "Are you sure?"

Akaashi shrugged, walking pass Bokuto back into the elevators. "I don't really mind."

"Besides—" the elevator doors opened, and Akaashi turned around to the other, who was still admiring Akaashi's portrait of him with the small sparkle in his eyes.

"You were the inspiration behind it. That's more than enough reason for me to give it to you."

Akaashi smiled at the look of Bokuto's expression, relieved at the fact that he didn't hate it at all. Bokuto stared at him as if he just scored the last winning point of a volleyball game, eyes widening with who knows what kind of emotion he was feeling right now. Akaashi didn't care if it was happiness, surprise, or genuine shock.

If giving something like this to Bokuto was enough to make him look at him like that, then Akaashi would be glad to paint a hundred more just like it.

This was what he wanted. To make Bokuto happy.

But, perhaps Akaashi himself was starting to become more greedy.

The taller one was speechless for a moment, the dings of the elevator snapping him back to reality.

"Do you not want it?" Akaashi asked worriedly, slightly feeling anxious when he climbed into the empty elevator.

"It's not that," Bokuto shook his head, smiling back down at the painting with a sentimental expression of his face. "It's just that I felt a little deja vu just now."

"Deja vu?" Akaashi raised an eyebrow, that small hopeful part of him that he's been holding onto slowly growing every second.

Bokuto protected the canvas like he was guarding it with his life, and Akaashi could tell just how giddy the other felt with just one look.

"I don't know," Bokuto shrugged, facing him with a wide smile that made Akaashi remember part of the reason that he fell for this idiot in the first place. "But lately, part of me just...hasn't been sitting right. But, you giving me this, I feel...like I'm closer to figuring out what I'm missing."

Akaashi was this close to telling Bokuto everything.

Tell him what really happened at the party. Tell him why he went out of his way to do what he did. Tell him how much he regretted when all he did was run away. Tell him those words that replays over and over in his mind.

The elevator doors opened for the two of them, and Akaashi hasn't said any of that. Bokuto hopped off, with Akaashi following right after him with a blank expression on his face.

_Am I allowed to do that?_ Akaashi thought frustratingly as he scrunched his nose in distaste at himself.

"Hey, Akaashi," Bokuto called out to him, pointing over to the direction of their dorm with his head, "Movie Marathon Sleepover Part Two at your place?"

"Don't you have work?"

"It's only almost one week left until Christmas!" Bokuto frowned, wanted Akaashi to at least act a little more excited, "I won't have any shifts then, so let's hang out!"

Akaashi huffed, watching his breaths turning into puffs of clouds thanks to the cold winter air. "I thought you had to ask a blondie out on a date for Kuroo's Christmas party."

_Why did I say that?_ Akaashi slipped out, immediately regretting his decision as he refused to look at anywhere but the ground in front of him.

"What's this? Is someone jealous?" Bokuto laughed, nudging the other's side with his elbow as a gesture of fun. But when Bokuto saw Akaashi's frown, he stopped poking at the other.

"Hey, I was just kidding," Bokuto sighed, and Akaashi almost felt ashamed of himself at the way that wave of relief washed over him. "Can't have you all alone on Christmas Eve, don't you think? I do need someone to take care of me when I'm getting wasted—!"

Akaashi brushed that feeling of hope rising in him aside, staring down at the snow in front of him. "On second thought, maybe you should find a date."

"So mean!"

"Do I look like a servant to you?"

"Jeez, why are you so stingy?"

"What."

Bokuto stuck his tongue out childishly, "Stin-gy."

"Ahh, you're probably right," Akaashi felt his eye twitch, a bit annoyed at the way he grew fond to Bokuto's immaturity like this. "If I'm so stingy, I should probably go home early so you can watch those movies by yourself."

Akaashi started to walk faster down to their dorm with a hidden smile, with Bokuto trailing right after the other, calling out his name.

_I need to be the one to take responsibility and fix this._

_So...just wait for me then, okay?_

* * *

"Shoot, I forgot my clothes at your dorm last night."

"Here, take my keys," Bokuto searched through his hoodie pockets, tossing them over into Akaashi's hands, "I still gotta figure out how to set up this up."

"I'll be right back," Akaashi said, leaving Bokuto alone to connect his system into Akaashi's TV since Bokuto wanted to have movie night in his room.

It was Bokuto who suggested they have it in Akaashi's room, because he always wanted to sleepover at his place, so with Kenma gone, he's taking that chance now! After they dropped off the painting Akaashi made in his room, they grabbed his DVD movies and system, and here they were.

Once he finally got the TV ready, Bokuto decided to look around Akaashi's room. He never really got a chance to look around much, but it was always like Bokuto imagined for someone like Akaashi. With just one look, you can obviously tell the difference between Akaashi's side of the room versus Kenma's.

He peeked on his desk, chuckling at the way Akaashi kept everything organized. He always knew that he liked the keep things clean, but it was almost as if he was working at an office. 

But there was some things that did catch his eye.

It was the small bottle that Bokuto found that night of the party, and right next to it was a neatly wrapped present.

_He still has this drink?_ Bokuto pondered, observing the drink in his hands. 

From what he remembered, it didn't taste like anything when he took a sip from it, but he was so drunk he could barely remember anything.

Bokuto took a small sip from the bottle out of curiosity, and sure enough, he didn't taste any flavor.

_So this is the kind of stuff he likes?  
_

Bokuto's attention drew to the present sitting on his desk. There was just something about it that just didn't exactly sit right with him...

He looked behind him, hoping that Akaashi wouldn't catch him snooping. The present was small, wrapped with a cute snowman wrapping paper and a red ribbon. The words "Happy Birthday Akaashi" was written clear with a sharpie pen.

_Akaashi's birthday..._

"Eh!?!" Bokuto panicked, picking up the box from the desk to find who gave Akaashi a birthday present, "Did I forget Akaashi's birthday??"

Bokuto looked around the box, hoping the person who gave him this put his name on it.

_What kind of idiot doesn't put their name when they're giving someone a present?_

He caught something move in the corner of his eye, and saw something slowly drift off from the desk. It was a note.

Bokuto put the gift back on the desk, and carefully picked up the note.

When he noticed that it was written in his own handwriting, his felt his whole body freeze. He had to make sure his eyes weren't playing tricks on him, but no matter how he saw it...he was definitely the one who wrote it.

And he had no memory writing it.

_HEY AKAASHI !!_

_Your present finally came in today, but I wanted to surprise you so I had Kuroo steal Kenma's keys >:D_

_Think of this as a way of me being with you no matter where you are. I don't know how my life would've turned out if I hadn't met you. I know it seems like I'm the energetic one here, but you're the one who gives me that spirit. When I first saw you, everything about you...just captivated me. And whenever we're on that roof together, you were like the moon I look up to when things get dark._

_You brought me to life._

_Whatever answer you give me tonight, my heart will always be with you, Akaashi._

_Bokuto <3_

His eyes skimmed through the words he wrote one more time. Two more times. A couple more times.

No matter how many times he read it, it only proved that this note was _real_.

He felt something tightening in his chest, gripping onto his heart like it was in chains, trying to break free. He turned the note over, and noticed something in the very back of the paper. It wasn't in his handwriting, but the writing he recognized was definitely Akaashi's.

It looked like Akaashi wrote some sort of message on the back. Slowly, he read every word,

_Thank you, for remembering Bokuto._

_I know you'll never see this, but I feel like if I don't write this down somewhere, I'll never be able to look forward._

_I've never fallen in love before._

_I don't know if what I did was the right decision, nor if I am going to regret it, but I do know one thing. You became a bright star in my life that doesn't look like burning out any time soon. Knowing that I am with you no matter where I am is more than enough for me._

_I would rather have you in my life rather than take a chance that might end up losing you completely._

Bokuto felt his own soul leaving his body, completely rendering himself utterly confused. When did he write this? Why did he say all those things? What does he mean?

Bokuto's heart pounded anxiously when he heard someone opening the door, and swiftly hid the note behind his back as inconspicuous as he could.

"Sorry I took a while, I got my clothes mixed in yours—" Akaashi came in, stopping when he caught Bokuto standing awkwardly in front of his desk. "What are you doing?"

"Just...looking around," Bokuto kept his hand behind him, unnoticeably slipping it into his back pocket when Akaashi turned around to put his clothes in his laundry basket.

"Around my desk?"

"I saw the present!" Bokuto tried to cover up nervously.

"Oh, right..." Akaashi scratched the back of his head, not showing the present much interest. "I haven't opened it yet, but I got it for my birthday."

"From who?"

Akaashi looked up for a moment with a contemplating look on his face. As much as he wanted to bombard Akaashi with a whole bunch of questions, he wanted to hear it first from the former himself.

"Kenma," Akaashi's gaze shifted to the walls, turning around to pick a movie to watch. Bokuto frowned at his back, feeling inside his pocket where he stuck the note in.

_You've been lying to me a lot more Akaashi, have you noticed that?_

He tried not to let the feeling of disappointment bother him too much. As curious as he was, he doesn't want Akaashi to stray away from him if he asked him on the spot.

"What do you feel like watching?" Akaashi asked, changing the subject as he picked up the different DVDs he grabbed from Bokuto's room.

"You pick," Bokuto blinked, rubbing his eyes when he felt a twitch in one of them.

_"Elf,"_ Akaashi answered instantly, popping the movie disk from it's case already inside.

Bokuto laughed at how excited Akaashi was. It was usually a rare sight, seeing Akaashi smiling so much. But the more they spent time together, the more Bokuto found himself growing more fond of it every time he catches a small glimpse of it.

When Bokuto's vision finally adjusted, he really thought he was starting to see things now.

He looked down at his hands, and saw some kind of string wrapped around his pinky finger. It was a thin, red thread, cut short that looked like it dangled from his finger about five inches in length. He picked at it with his other hand, noticing the rough edges at the end of the string.

_I can touch it?_ Bokuto thought to himself, _This is what they call the red string of fate, isn't it? But how_ —

"Bokuto?" Akaashi called him, waving a hand in front of his face, "Did you hear me?"

Bokuto snapped back to reality, but something else seemed to have caught his eye in that moment. He grabbed onto Akaashi's wrist that was waving in front of him, staring down at the other's pinky. He missed the surprising look in Akaashi's eyes at the sudden gesture, his face turning in a crimson color while Bokuto observed his hands.

_Akaashi has one too? And it's also been cut? Why can I see it now...what did I—_

"Bokuto...?"

Bokuto shook his head, frantically dropping Akaashi's hand and started muttering apologies, saying how he was just spacing out just now. Akaashi didn't believe him at first, but figured it would've been a lot more complicated if he did ask.

"I was just asking if you wanted popcorn?" Akaashi hugged his wrist closer to his body, "Or if there was something you wanted to eat I could make for you?"

"Just popcorn is alright," Bokuto replied, starting to become more wary of himself. Akaashi nodded in response, heading out of the room again.

Bokuto felt his legs give up under him, dropping to the ground as he felt all these questions smother him at once. He pulled the note out of his pocket, reading what he wrote over and over again, to the point where he could recite every line from memory.

_"_ _Whenever we're on that roof together, you were like the moon I look up to when things get dark._ _You brought me to life."_

Those words seemed to stick in Bokuto's mind more than the others. He knew that he was never good at putting his feelings into the right words. This letter here says otherwise, but...

What exactly were those feelings?

Bokuto felt a sudden pounding sensation in his head, and his mind began to flood him with quick flashes of memories that he had zero recollection of. 

He tried to focus, but voices inside his head were too indistinctive to one another that he kept confusing one memory with another. A series of different conversations came after another, and Bokuto could only catch a a few phrases from each one...

_"Thank you, Bokuto-san."  
_

_"What's your name?"_

_"Akaashi. Akaashi Keiji."_

_"I don't always...about him!"  
_

_"I just wanted to give you a..."_

_"You should draw...sometime."_

_"You think I'm...?"_

_"Why are you letting me...this whole time?"_

_"I'll stick by you."_

_"Keiji."_

_"Do you believe in...?"_

_"I'll make you say...I promise that!"  
_

Promise? Promise what??

Bokuto felt overwhelmed by all these instant thoughts in his head, gripping onto the note in his hands without trying to crease it. He placed the note back under the gift. He bit down on his bottom lip, pacing around the room while he waited for Akaashi to come back.

_Whatever answer you give me tonight, my heart will always be with you, Akaashi._

There was a part of him that was starting to remember...

* * *

Bokuto didn't end up sleeping over at Akaashi's dorm tonight. 

He felt like he wouldn't be able to get any sleep at all if he were to sleep in the same room as him. There were so many things he wanted to ask him, but he wasn't sure if he'd be prepared to accept his answers.

He had no idea what was going on with him. He felt like there was this little voice inside his head, screaming at him that he was just missing _something_. Something important.

_Ba-thump._

"Something must be wrong with me," Bokuto thought out loud, sliding his back down against his closed door.

_My heart is beating so loud for some reason._

Just when he was about to plop down on his bed and pass out, he caught a small box on his bed with bow on top. _A present?_

"Where'd you come from?" Bokuto picked up the box in his hands, shaking it slightly. He turned the box over a couple times, and found a writing on the side.

_To: Bokuto_

_From: Akaashi_

Bokuto almost dropped the box in surprise when he read Akaashi's name. Immediately, he pulled on the ribbon, untying the bow from its neatly wrapped state. He tore the wrapping paper out, eagerly waiting to open it.

He opened the box, and found a small note inside.

_Merry Christmas, Bokuto_

_I hope you actually opened this gift on the day of Christmas, and not when you first saw the box on your bed._

Bokuto winced slightly at the irony, but still, continued reading.

_I actually been working on this for you. Back when we first met, you said you wanted one. I don't know if it would be your style, but I think it would suit you. Nothing special, but I hope you like it._

_From, Akaashi_

Bokuto laughed at Akaashi's short but sweet letter, and put it aside for safekeeping. He looked inside the box, and what he saw was not exactly what he expected. But he wasn't the least disappointed at all.

_Ba-thump._

There, inside that box...was a bucket hat.

It wasn't anything extravagant or fancy or expensive at all. Maybe it was just him, but Bokuto couldn't even tell Akaashi was the one who made it either.

The black fabric denim of the hat didn't feel like it was just some arts and crafts project. But right there, inside the hat, Bokuto could see Akaashi's signature embroidered on it. He could tell that he took a lot of time as the fine lines were carefully painted, until it all came together into a picture of a cherry blossom _—_

_A cherry blossom._

His heart started to pound more. _Where has he seen this before?_

Bokuto dropped the hat on his bed, immediately rummaging through his desk. He felt something itch in the back of his head, almost as if he was trying to grab onto the memory of it before it escaped again. He searched through all his folders, his notebooks, the little gaps in between his papers and old homework.

_I put it somewhere here...where did it go??_

He felt a small rise of panic in his chest, ignoring the mess he was making as he frantically tore through each page of notebooks and papers.

_Ba-thump._

"Come on...Come on..." Bokuto was starting to get antsy, and before he knew it, he had already emptied his desk. He felt his pulse slowing down, looking around the piles of papers he took out on the floor. When he couldn't find anything, he let the papers fall from his grasp.

He backtracked in his steps, sitting on his chair with his head buried in his hands.

That's when another idea struck when he felt it.

He reached for his back pocket, and took out the small wallet that he always carried around. He searched through each pocket, one by one. Until he found it.

He took out the crumpled up paper that was tuck safely in one of the back folds of his wallet. He unfolded it carefully, and sure enough, there was that same sketch of the lotus flower, beautifully drawn by someone who once called it 'trash.'

_"You...you drew this?"  
_

_"It's trash, I was going to throw it away later."  
_

_"Don't you dare!"  
_

Another memory flashed in Bokuto's head, and the more he focused on it, the more confused he was. 

Bokuto remembered every feeling he got when it came to something important. The first time he spiked the winning point. The first time he went to Nationals. The first time he saw snow, and the first time he met Kuroo, Hinata, Kenma, he remembered every single emotion. The good, the bad, the devastation and excitement.

So why is it that he couldn't remember what his exact feelings were when Akaashi gave him this drawing?

_Ba-thump._

He sat down on his bed, Akaashi's sketch in one hand and his hat in the other. He looked between the two, hoping for something...to just _click_.

He knows that a lot has happened between the two of them in the past few months they spent together. Bokuto didn't realize it at first, but they were practically inseparable.

Were all those times when he felt happy with Akaashi really only because they were becoming close?

_Should I ask Kuroo? No, no...that'd be weird. I can't ask him about_ my _feelings.  
_  
Bokuto thought back to when they were together earlier. He looked down at his own pinky. The red thread he saw earlier disappeared after a while, but it's safe to say that he wasn't just seeing things.

_What if...the red string of fate was real?  
_  
If it was...was it just a coincidence that both his and Akaashi's were both cut for some reason...?

Bokuto didn't know what to think anymore. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to think deeply anymore. He tried to remember back to all those times he spent with Akaashi, looking back on flashes of every moment they shared together, everything that they've done together.

_Ba-thump. Ba-thump. Ba-thump. BA-THUMP.  
_  
That was when Bokuto opened his eyes in realization, finally recognizing the voice in his head when it only kept getting louder and louder with each race of his pulse. Until now, he finally understood what it kept trying to tell him.

It kept telling him to _remember_.

And the first person that always came to his mind afterwards was none other than Keiji Akaashi.

Bokuto felt his vision starting to blur, and his hand went up to his face. He could already feel a tear streaming down the side of his cheek. He let out a soft laugh to himself, letting himself cry as much as his heart had been wanting him to.

And this time, he knew exactly why he was crying. 

"How could I ever forget...?"

* * *

It's been a few days since Akaashi last hung out with Bokuto. He didn't give him an exact reason, but he told him that he had some things to take care of before Kuroo's Christmas party. He didn't think much of it, since he also had some Christmas shopping to do himself.

He walked through the shopping district, looking through his list of people he needs to buy gifts for.

"Let's see..." He mumbled to himself, thinking out loud, "Kuroo...Hinata...Oikawa..."

Akaashi wondered if Bokuto got his gift.

_Was it too simple? Should I have gone out to buy something? They always said it's the thought that counts, but what if Bokuto actually like expensive things? No, he's not that kind of person to care about something like that. Should I get him something else?_

_No! No, another gift would just boost his ego, it's like a weakness of his._

_...Maybe I should get him another gift?_

Akaashi shook his head at the thought, focusing more on the people he didn't get gifts for then. He has three days until the party to buy, package, wrap the presents, which should be more than enough time for him.

"Maybe I can get Kenma something there," Akaashi thought, spotting a game store not so far away.

Just when he was about to put the list back in his pocket, he stumbled right into someone.

Right away, he started to spill out an apology. "I'm sorry—"

"Ah!" The person he bumped into interrupted excitedly, "So we meet again!"

Akaashi looked up, and almost grimaced at another surprise coincidence that fate seemed to bother him with.

"Don't make that face!" Tendou smiled with that cheshire grin, poking at Akaashi's sides, "You'll hurt my feelings!"

"I didn't you had feelings, Tendou-san."

"So I see you haven't changed," Tendou sighed, shifting the weight of his grocery bag to his other hand, "So, did you do it? Did you cut the string?"

Akaashi winced at the question, the feeling of remorse settling back in the pit of his stomach.

"Yeah," Akaashi answered a little more harshly than he intended, "I did."

"Great!" Tendou clasped his hands together, holding a hand out to the other, "And my scissors?"

He had no idea how he knew, but he figured Tendou didn't say he was good at guessing for nothing. Akaashi reached into his hoodie pocket, and hesitantly gave the scissors back to him.

"Why the glum, chum?" Tendou laughed, stuffing the scissors into his bag without a care, "Do you regret cutting it now?"

Akaashi scraped at the ground with the sole of his shoes, not knowing exactly how to answer. _Of course_ he regretted it. He even regrets it now. But saying it out loud wasn't going to make it any better or make any difference, much less if he was admitting it to Tendou of all people.

"Yes," Akaashi frowned sadly at himself, slumping his shoulders forward at the thought. "I do regret it."

"So you found out you really do love him after all, huh?"

Akaashi chewed at the bottom of his lip, taking in the hard truth that came out of someone else's mouth.

"What do I do?"

Tendou cocked an eyebrow at him, tilting his head curiously, "Why are you asking me?"

"I don't know," Akaashi sighed in defeat, staring down at the snow that fell on the ground, "Forget it. I'll see you, Tendou-san."

Akaashi walked around the red headed fortune teller, feeling a lot more heavy than he felt before their short conversation.

"A-kaa-shi-kun!" He heard Tendou say behind him with a sing song voice with every syllable in his name. Akaashi looked over his shoulder, seeing a different kind of smile on his face.

This one felt a little more sincere than the others.

"No one knows your feelings best better than you do," Tendou sighed knowingly, "Overthinking things will get you nowhere."

Akaashi nodded at his few words of advice. "Thank you, Tendou-san."

"Anyways, it's Christmas, so stop being sad!" Tendou came up to the other and slapped him on the back, his smirk returning to his face, "Your depression is spreading like a disease."

Just when he was about to bite back, another person came up from behind Akaashi.

"Wakatoshi-kun!" Tendou perked up, shoving Akaashi aside for the person behind him, "Finally, you're done!"

"I had a problem with the self checkout." The one Tendou called 'Wakatoshi' replied, "Who's this?"

"Just a customer of mine," Tendou brushed over, turning to Akaashi for one last goodbye. "We should grab some dinner at the restaurant some time, Akaashi-kun! Merry Christmas! Let's go—!"

'Wakatoshi' subtly waved politely at him, and Akaashi awkwardly did the same, catching the thin red thread dangling on his pinky. The two left him by himself again, with Akaashi staring at the their backs as they disappeared down the street.

_Tendou and Wakatoshi, huh?_ Akaashi sighed, noting the little red thread that connected between the two. He turned back on his heels, and walked towards the game store to continue his Christmas shopping. There was a part of him that just knew what Tendou said was right.

"I guess I really do need to stop thinking so much," Akaashi laughed to himself, feeling all the more silly while he looked through the new videogames displayed on the shelves.

* * *

The day before Christmas.

Akaashi asked Kenma for his help to carry all the gifts he needs to bring to Kuroo's apartment. The two couple had just come back from their childhood homes, and Akaashi had bitten off more than he could chew with the holiday shopping.

"I can't believe you bought this much, even for some people you barely know," Kenma groaned, loading some of the gifts into Kuroo's car. "Where'd you even get the money for all these?"

"I robbed a bank," Akaashi answered jokingly, helping Kenma sort the gifts as the other shot him with an unamused expression at his gesture. "I'm just kidding. I sell some art and clothes I made online, and surprisingly some people actually buy them."

"I think you've been hanging around Bokuto too much since I was gone," Kenma refuted, "You're jokes aren't getting any better."

Akaashi amused the other with a small laugh, a bit torn by what he was going to do. It's only been a few more days since he saw Bokuto, but he felt like he couldn't wait another minute. He already decided what he was wanted to do this time. And this time, he was all in.

"Speaking of Bokuto," Kenma closed the car door after he loaded the last gift box inside, "Are you guys okay?"

"Define okay," Akaashi climbed into the shotgun seat, while Kenma went into the drivers to start the car.

"Like is it awkward between you two?"

"Not really," Akaashi shook his head, stopping midway from buckling his seatbelt when he realized something. "Oh wait! I forgot one more."

"Seriously?" Kenma rolled his eyes, stopping the car engine right after. "You have five minutes or you're walking yourself to Kuroo's. We still have to help him with set up for the party later tonight."

"I'll be quick," Akaashi called under the hood of the car, rushing out back to their dorms.

He sprinted to the entrance, waiting for the elevator to take him to his floor to come. Once he was there, he jogged over to his dorm room, unlocking it quickly and turned on the lights inside. Immediately, he found the gift he was looking for.

Akaashi picked up the gift box with the snowman wrapping cutely tied up in a bow, and sighed in relief. Can't forget about this one.

Just as fast as he came, he returned back to the car just in time. Akaashi put his gift along with the other ones, which obviously stood out compared to the wrapping paper that Akaashi used.

"Isn't that the gift you got for your birthday?" Kenma asked, looking behind him to pull Kuroo's car out from the parking lot, "You haven't opened yet?"

"I always open my gifts on Christmas," Akaashi shrugged, not seeing anything wrong with it, "But I've been waiting to open this one for a while."

Kenma cocked an eyebrow up at the other questioningly, noticing the change in Akaashi's expression. "Excited, aren't you?"

Akaashi hid a small smile behind his hand, leaning against his fist against the window. "A little bit."

The two of them sat on the car ride to Kuroo's apartment in a comfortable silence, and when they got there, it was already a total mess.

"That horned owl bastard!" Kuroo cursed in the air when Akaashi and Kenma walked in, hands full of the gifts they brought.

When Akaashi saw the interior of the apartment, he noticed the change compared to the last time he was here. There was a mess of pine needles in the living room, and Kuroo was frantically running around from the living room and the kitchen at the same time.

"Kuroo, what—"

"I told that idiot to come in every day to water the tree and sweep up the pine needles while I was gone," Kuroo sighed frustratingly, tossing the needles into the garbage can, "What has he been doing this whole time!"

Akaashi set down the gifts on the side, and Kenma did the same.

"That might be his fault," Kenma pointed to Akaashi, and the other whipped his head towards him with a betrayed look on his face, "They've been together ever since the break started."

Kuroo looked at Akaashi with bewilderment in his eyes, "Wait, but I thought you guys weren't going to—"

"Kuroo," Kenma interrupted him, and Kuroo's attention immediately shifted to Kenma at the sound of his name, "Help me with this."

"Gladly!" Kuroo hopped over to his boyfriend happily, helping the other lift up the presents to take under the tree. Kenma snuck a wink towards Akaashi, and Akaashi thanked him silently with the nod of his head.

"Where is he anyways?" Kuroo asked, warming up the fireplace while Kenma fixed up the television in the living room, "He said he'd be here to help out and he went MIA."

"Not sure," Kenma shrugged, plugging in the game and karaoke system into the TV, "But he'll be here tonight. You know he never bails on you when it comes to parties."

"Yeah, you're right," Kuroo sighed, joining Akaashi in the kitchen, "He's probably panicking doing some last minute shopping, that idiot."

If they asked Akaashi, he wouldn't have been able to answer that either. Bokuto hasn't contacted him since the day he ran into Tendou a couple days ago. He was getting worried that maybe he did something that might've made Bokuto not come out tonight after all. He wondered if he was being too awkward around him, and he finally picked up on his feelings. What if he really messed things up this time? What if—

_No._ Akaashi shook his head, bringing the knife in his hands down to cut the vegetables into pieces, startling Kuroo next to him. Bringing himself out of his head, he gave Kuroo an embarrassed smile, continuing to slice less maniacally than he did before. This time, he was confident in his decisions.

_No more overthinking._ _No more worrying._

_Just tell him the truth._

* * *

The party had already started almost two hours ago.

Still, there was no sign of Bokuto.

Akaashi felt stupid every time he turned his head to the front at the sound of the the door opening. Almost everyone who joined last time came to Kuroo's party tonight, even more came out tonight, some that Akaashi never even met before.

He didn't realize how spacious Kuroo's apartment was at first until it was already filled with people laughing, talking, eating, gaming, whatever. The heat traveled around the room, warming up everyone who was inside the apartment.

_I wonder if Bokuto feels cold right now..._

The scenery wasn't that much different from the last party, just more people. Akaashi sat on the edge of the couch, watching Hinata, Kageyama, and Kenma play Mario Kart again together. This time, Oikawa and Terushima joined them, bringing their own game controllers that allowed them to add more players. And this time, Iwaizumi joined them as well, shouting at Oikawa's ear like he was riding shotgun giving him directions on what to do.

"Oi—! Oikawa you dumbass, you made me fall off the bridge!" Terushima cried out in frustration.

"Who chose this map!?" Kageyama sneered, leaning against Hinata to block the other's vision from screen.

"MOVE!!!"

"SHOYO! THAT'S CHEATING!"

"HYAH HYAH!!"

Akaashi chuckled to himself as they shouted over the other, while Kenma was well already drifting to first place pass all of them. He felt like he was babysitting a bunch of kids rather than a bunch of teenagers gathered together for a light holiday party. He looked more around the apartment, catching glimpses of the other people came along.

Some of them he recognized from his time in Nekoma, mostly people from the volleyball team if he remembered correctly. There were a few other people he didn't recognize though, but he remembered Kuroo mentioning how he also invited alumnus from Fukurodani and Karasuno.

No matter how much Akaashi saw how lively everyone looked from his perspective, he couldn't bring himself to match the same energy. He felt as if there was something missing. A missing puzzle piece that would fall into place perfectly.

More like a missing someone.

He _misses_ Bokuto.

Akaashi didn't wanted to sit around any longer, listening to all the loud noises from inside. Or at least, he needed a little a break for a bit. He didn't want to feel like he was on the outside looking in any more than he has to.

He got up from his seat, squeezing his way past through the mingling people. He felt someone catch his shoulder, and Akaashi looked over to see Kuroo stare at him with a concerned look in his eyes.

"Hey, where you going?"

Akaashi shrugged him off gently, pointing his head over to the direction of his balcony. "I just needed some fresh air."

Kuroo didn't seem to believe him, narrowing his eyes in suspicion, "Alright, but you gotta come back in before midnight! We're gonna start opening gifts then!"

He nodded at the other, and turned on his heels towards the balcony. When Akaashi opened the doors, he felt a rush of the cold air run through him, breathing in the feeling of winter and snow that surrounded him.

He closed the doors behind him, and walked up slowly to the same spot he walked to not only a couple weeks ago. He reminded their conversation from then.

_"I really...don't want to lose you again."  
_

_"I'm not going anywhere, even if you reject me right now."  
_

_"I don't know why it hurts so much."_

_"I'll wait for you..."_

"No matter what it takes." Akaashi muttered to himself against the cold breeze nipping at his nose. 

It felt like ages ago since all that happened. He felt like nothing much have changed since then. But at the same time, everything felt different.

Akaashi took in the a deep breath, a delicate feeling filled his chest when he let out a long sigh as if he was taking in all his problems and heaved them off the ledge. He leaned over the balcony, staring at particularly nothing as he watched the snow dance pass him.

Still, he couldn't get rid of the feeling that he was missing something.

Akaashi checked the time, and noticed that it was only an hour until midnight. He figured that Bokuto wasn't going to come after all, turning back from the ledge of the balcony to join the party back inside.

_Is this what they mean when they say they're on the outside, always looking in?_

Just as he was about to leave the balcony, someone slid the door wide open with force. Akaashi felt a shiver at the sudden outburst, freezing in his tracks. Slowly, his eyes met up with those golden eyes that looked a lot more intense than usual. 

They looked _angry_.

"You..." He said breathlessly, shutting the door closed behind him. The sounds of the party behind them became muffled again.

"Bokuto...?"

Akaashi couldn't bring himself to move his body. Now that he was seeing Bokuto again, he was reminded of that night, when they were in such a similar situation. The image of Bokuto's teary eyes was something that haunted Akaashi every night since then.

But this time, Bokuto wore an expression that was a lot more hurtful than that night. It was hard for him to look him in the eyes. Because if he did, he would just spill _everything_ right then and there.

"'I've never fallen in love before.'"

Hearing those familiar words was enough for Akaashi to whip his head up at the other, and felt his cheeks start to heat up with embarrassment. "What are you—"

"'I would rather have you in my life rather than take a chance that might end up losing you completely.'" Bokuto interrupted, gritting his teeth at the end of every word.

"How do you—"

"Sound familiar?"

Akaashi winced at the distressed tone he heard in Bokuto's voice. He watched the other stare aimlessly at the ground, hands turning red from being exposed to the cold air. He could already see the way they shook anxiously, struggling to piece everything together in his head.

_"Well?!"_

Bokuto snapped at the other, and the more he spoke, the more Akaashi can see him finding himself more lost.

Akaashi's words were caught in his throat, leaving him tongue tied the moment he saw the tears brimming Bokuto's eyes, refusing to let them fall.

"Yeah, I remember," Akaashi answered steadily, backtracking in his steps away from Bokuto when he felt that sickening feeling deepening in the pit of his stomach.

_Shame._

Bokuto took a step forward, placing a hand against his chest frustratingly.

_"Then why cant I?"_

Akaashi flinched, taking another step back while Bokuto took another step forward.

_Tell him._

"I..."

_You idiot, just tell him!_

"These past few days I thought you were acting weird," Bokuto sighed, calming down slightly when he backed away from the other. "But then I realize that _I_ started feeling weird. I thought, maybe, I did something. That I was forgetting something really important."

Akaashi shook his head, finding some kind of strength in his legs to step forward instead of back. "That's not it—!"

"I drank your stupid bottle, okay?!" Bokuto cried out, not looking up at Akaashi in the eyes. "I saw _EVERYTHING!"_

The crack in Bokuto's voice made Akaashi's heart drop to the pit of his stomach. He felt the words choking him in guilt, making him want to scream right back at the other.

Except he couldn't. Bokuto had every right to be upset.

"It's true...isn't it?"

Bokuto felt his legs give up beneath him. He dropped to the ground, crouching over with his hands over his head. Akaashi had to hold himself back from the urge to comfort the other. He needed to hear what he had to say first before he could say what he wanted the other to hear. 

Akaashi gripped his hands into fists, digging his nails slightly against his palm of his skin to give him the courage to say his next words.

"I didn't even think it was possible, but..." Akaashi sighed, knowing that there was no way in running away from this any more.

"We...we were each other's soulmates."

Bokuto didn't look up, wiping his eyes against the fabric of his hoodie. "'Were?'"

Akaashi nodded, feeling the guilt weighing on his shoulders. He wished that he didn't have to admit it out loud to Bokuto, but it was nothing more than the truth. He rubbed the side of his arm nervously, staring down at the top of Bokuto's head in front of him.

"I...cut it. Our red thread," Akaashi admitted, pursing his lips expectedly, "I cut our red string of fate."

Silence.

All Akaashi heard was silence from the other.

"That night...the last time we were here..." Bokuto asked, his voice trembling with a pure feeling of confusion.

Slowly, he rose up from the ground, taking one step forward as Akaashi instinctly took a step back again. When he looked him in the eyes, Akaashi could see the betrayal clear in his expression.

"That was when I did it..." Akaashi finished his thought reluctantly, feeling the metal ledge of the balcony piercing his back. "When I cut the string last time."

"I see."

Bokuto stared at him with disbelief. He tried his best to calm himself down, but it was all too much to take in at once. 

The lack of emotion in Bokuto's response made Akaashi restless. From all the times they've spent together, Akaashi has never heard him sound this _disheartened_.

And it hurt even more to know that he was the cause of it.

"So it's like that, huh?" Bokuto whispered to himself, but Akaashi was able to catch it. 

The corners of his mouth slowly turned up in a bittersweet smile. "Were my feelings really that trivial to you? Is the idea of being my...my soulmate...that terrible to you?"

"That's not it!"

"Then _what?!"_

Akaashi stepped forward, his voice desperate to get rid of the sinking feeling he held inside. "I hated the idea of your feelings being controlled by fate!"

He didn't realize the crack in his raised voice until he heard, shrinking back on himself. The two of them fell silent as Akaashi's words hung in the air.

"You really are stupid, aren't you?"

Akaashi bristled at his response, pulling back from the other as he leaned his weight against the balcony.

Bokuto took quick strides towards him, and Akaashi avoided any eye contact. All he heard was his heart pounding against him, and the sounds of Bokuto's footsteps walking up to him. 

When he heard the footsteps stop, Akaashi looked up to find Bokuto strangely close to him, looking at him straight in the eyes.

"There's so much I'm still confused about," Bokuto said, with a more calming tone in his voice. Akaashi's held his own breath in anticipation, locked under his vibrant golden gaze. "But I do know that red string couldn't have been controlling my feelings."

"What do you me—"

Akaashi was cut off by the other when Bokuto caught his lips with his own.

His eyes widened in surprised, a warm feeling slowly taking over as he felt his soft lips against his. Slowly, Akaashi found himself melting under the warmth, closing his eyes as he snaked his arms over Bokuto's shoulders, deepening the kiss in satisfaction. He felt Bokuto's hand come up, holding his cheek affectionately, feeling his thumb circling over his cold skin.

Words couldn't describe the emotions running around in Akaashi right now. Relief, happiness, content—None of those words were enough. At this moment, he only knew one thing.

Akaashi felt like he was home.

The two broke away from their kiss, foreheads touching tenderly with one another as they both took a breath. Neither of them said anything, staying like that in the moment as Akaashi took in the shock and relief.

"My feelings have nothing to do with that stupid thread," Bokuto gasped breathlessly, keeping his hands cupped against Akaashi's cheeks when he pulled his face away from the other.

"Because I fell in love with you again, you dummy."

Akaashi couldn't help the tears falling against face when he saw the fond expression in Bokuto's eyes. All those restricting feelings he's held inside, the pressure he put on himself, all those internal conflicts and thoughts and the constant thinking and thinking he struggled with himself just— _disappeared._

He relaxed himself into Bokuto's arms, intending not to make a mistake a second time and let go.

"Hah—!" Bokuto let out an exasperated sigh loudly, resting his chin on top of Akaashi's head. "I should've done that the first time I confessed, huh?"

"I-I'm sorry," Akaashi cried against the crook of his neck, gripping onto his shirt like a lost child. "I...I didn't want to. I-I didn't know w-what to do—w-with all these feelings and these emotions and a-always seeing the red thread—!"

Akaashi felt a soft chuckle leave from Bokuto's chest, and he felt a hand coming up, gently comforting the back of his head.

"Look who's rambling this time?" Bokuto teased, using his other hand to wipe the tears that fell against Akaashi's skin. "Why do you care so much about some silly string?"

When Akaashi pulled up, he saw the tears begin to overflow Bokuto's eyes this time. Bokuto broke into a hiccupped laughter, brushing against Akaashi's cheeks under his thumb like it was the most natural thing to do.

"I guess I've been scared of love my whole life," Akaashi answered in realization, leaning against Bokuto's comforting touch, "It was too unpredictable. I was just...I was just afraid of losing you."

"It's okay now," Bokuto gave Akaashi a bright smile, turning his cheek to the side to give him a quick kiss, leaving a warm feeling against Akaashi's skin.

"I found my way to you again!"

Akaashi let out a small chuckle, feeling silly over all those thoughts he agonized himself with. "I was always with you."

The two of them relaxed in each other's company as if nothing else mattered. The tears stopped flowing, but they still remained in one another's hold.

Behind them, muffled along with the loud music and chatter of the party that Akaashi almost forgot about, were the sounds of their friends beginning to count down the seconds until midnight like it was New Years.

"We should go back inside," Akaashi mumbled, staring to walk back to join their friends. Before he could, Bokuto caught his hand.

"Wait just a minute," Bokuto stopped him, pulling him back around, "I'll be right back."

Bokuto left Akaashi in the balcony, running inside real quick.

Just when he left, Akaashi felt his knees start to buckle under him weakly. He leaned against the ledge for support, letting out a lighthearted laughter that was long overdue.

_I feel...happy._

He looked over to the sky, watching the snowflakes dance around each other as they fell.

Yeah...he feels a lot more lighter himself.

The sounds of the sliding door opening caught his attention again, and when Akaashi looked back, he was met with Bokuto wearing a hat and holding a present in his hands.

Akaashi looked agape at the hat on his head. "That's—"

"I can't believe you remembered I wanted one," Bokuto shook his head slightly with the bucket hat following his motions, "If it weren't for your gift, I probably wouldn't have been able to remember."

"So you like it?" Akaashi sighed in relief, smiling at the way Bokuto looked up at his handiwork proudly.

"I love it," Bokuto beamed, handing over the box in his hands into Akaashi's, "Now, it's your turn!"

Akaashi stared down at the familiar gift wrapped in that cute snowman wrapping paper with a pretty bow, waiting to be opened.

"If I remembered correctly," Bokuto scratched the back of his head, "I made this one myself as well. But it was my first time making something like this, and I had Kuroo help me."

Carefully, Akaashi picked at the edges of the wrapping paper, tearing it open while Bokuto waited excitedly in front of him. He handed him the red ribbon. All that was left was a box, leaving Akaashi to open the flaps, and what was inside...

"A scarf?"

Sure enough, there was scarf inside the box that definitely looked manmade. It felt soft to the touch, and for Bokuto's first time, Akaashi was impressed by his craftsmanship when he held the scarf in his hands.

"I don't know," Bokuto shrugged nervously, "I-It just felt right."

Akaashi raised an eyebrow at the other. "A red scarf?"

"You should be an artist!" Bokuto pouted, pointing at the scarf with a serious look on his face, "You know that's burgundy!"

"You made me a burgundy scarf?"

"Stop saying it like that!" Bokuto whined childishly at the other. He took the scarf from Akaashi's grasp, and carefully, he lace the fabric around his neck, pulling Akaashi closer to him as he did. Akaashi watched the other, his nose turning a little red from being out in the cold for too long, but it didn't look like it bothered him at all.

"I noticed that you get cold easily," Bokuto said, not letting go of the ends of the scarf after wrapping it around Akaashi. "So I wanted to try to make you something since you're an artist. I just wanted to give you something I made myself."

Akaashi softened at Bokuto's genuine sincerity, immediately feeling the warmth hugging around him as he leaned against the soft fabric.

"Thank you, Bokuto," Akaashi mumbled, feeling the skin of his neck start to heat up as he buried his nose into the scarf. "I'll...cherish this."

Bokuto's expression immediately changed as he threw his arms over Akaashi, pulling him into a hug that felt warmer to Akaashi than any other feeling.

"Akaaaaaashiiiiiii!" Bokuto called against his ear, and Akaashi felt himself soften at the sound of his name.

Akaashi gave him a light chuckle, burying his face against his shoulder as he took in that familiar scent of Bokuto's that he missed so much.

"Merry Christmas, Bokuto."

"Merry Christmas, Akaashi."

Nothing else felt more right. 

When Bokuto pulled away, he took out the red ribbon that was used in to wrap Akaashi's present. With one end of the ribbon, he managed to tie it around his own pinky finger. 

Akaashi stared at him curiously. "What are you doing?"

He grabbed onto Akaashi's hand, and started wrapping the other end of the ribbon around his pinky. 

Bokuto let out a small giggle when he finished, lifting up his finger with Akaashi's. "You're not allowed to cut this one."

Akaashi hiccupped at the evidently innocence behind Bokuto's actions, but he couldn't help but feel his heart swell up when he felt the thick lace of the ribbon against his skin.

"Let's head back," Akaashi said, grabbing onto Bokuto's hands as he led the two of them back inside of Kuroo's apartment, "They must be giving out the presents right now."

Bokuto happily followed him in his tracks, squeezing Akaashi's hand reassuringly. Both their hands were cold, but neither of them noticed. 

"Hey, Akaashi?"

Akaashi looked over his shoulder. "Yeah?"

"What do you think of Christmas?"

Akaashi looked at him with a confused look for a second, until he realized what Bokuto meant. He smiled to himself, feeling like it was ages ago since the time that he declared that promise to him right here and then.

"Christmas?" Akaashi tilted his head, turning back to Bokuto with a tender expression he didn't know he was capable of making. 

"I love Christmas."

Bokuto lifted their hands together, placing a soft kiss on Akaashi's knuckles. "Me too."

When they finally came back inside the apartment, closing the balcony door behind them, no one paid them much attention in particular. One by one, people's names were being called out as they were given each gift, passing presents amongst one another, conversations overlapped together.

"Guess we didn't miss much?" Bokuto laughed, pulling Akaashi with a tug back to the living room where everything was happening. Lighthearted music filled the room, and this time, Akaashi didn't feel like a part of him was missing.

Because that part of him was right here, standing right next to him, never letting go of his hand as if he was going to escape if he ever did.

"Hey, look!" Akaashi heard someone shout over some people, turning his head to see that it was Hinata who called. "Mistletoe!!"

Akaashi felt something brush on top of his head, and when he looked up, there it was. A mistletoe.

"Finally!" Someone else called behind him, seeing Kuroo holding the stick the connected the mistletoe over Akaashi and Bokuto's heads, "You two finally got your shit together."

"Kuroo," Bokuto stared at his friend feeling slightly embarrassed, "You bastard—!"

"Well don't just stand there!" Kuroo ignored him, "Kiss him!"

Akaashi didn't the unwanted attention that was put on him, but when he saw the flustered look on Bokuto's face, it was hard to resist. He smirked to himself, turning Bokuto around swiftly, grabbing him by the cheeks and connected their lips together in a sweet, simple kiss. He heard their friends cheer and whistle around them, but he couldn't care less about any of that.

He felt the way Bokuto trembled under is touch, but relaxed himself into the kiss, picking himself up from the initial shock that Akaashi surprised him with.

But once he knew what was going on, Bokuto took over control, cupping Akaashi's face in his hands as he went in for another kiss. Another roar of excitement came out of everyone, and Akaashi never knew until now how happy he felt at a simple gesture that ended up holding so much meaning to him.

When Bokuto held him under his comforting touch, Akaashi really felt like he was the one who was brought to life.

* * *

_**From: Bokuto >:3** _

_Rooftop?_

* * *

"So you've been able to see the red string of fate every since you were born, huh?" Bokuto took in after Akaashi spent the last half hour explaining, "Like Superman!"

"Sure," Akaashi chuckled lightly, "Like Superman."

It was only the day after Christmas, but since then, Akaashi has never felt more content.

And here they were again, meeting up on top of their dorm roof in the middle of the night. Akaashi sighed, feeling a lot more at ease when he rested his head against Bokuto's shoulder.

"Then—you got this drink from a total stranger who claimed to be a psychic?" Bokuto lifted up the bottle of drink up to his eyes, "So you could cut the red string that connected the two of us so we wouldn't be soulmates anymore?"

"Shut up!" Akaashi felt his skin heat up with embarrassment when Bokuto said it out loud. "I didn't know what else to do."

"I know, I know," Bokuto said reassuringly, ruffling Akaashi's hair playfully, "It's just a lot to take in at once. Can't believe this Tendou guy was serious."

Before Akaashi realize what he was doing, Bokuto uncapped the bottle, drinking one sip of the drink before he could stop him.

Akaashi widened his eyes, "What are you—!"

"I just wanted to check something," Bokuto said calmly, handing the bottle into Akaashi's hands, "Don't you?"

Akaashi stared down at the bottle reluctantly. A lot of bad memories came by after just taking one sip from this drink, a lot of things he did that he couldn't take back. Slowly, he finished the rest of the contents in the bottle, finally emptying the drink.

He tossed the bottle into the trash, and the two of them waited. He felt more than comfortable leaning his head against Bokuto's chest, feeling the slight rise and fall of his steady breathing.

"Hey, look," Bokuto raised his pinky in front of the two of them. Akaashi looked down at his own, seeing the image of the red string appear around his own pinky.

The two of them compared their pinkies together, staring at the two strands.

Separated.

Bokuto sighed expectantly, and Akaashi felt a hint of disappointment when he saw that their red string of fate really was no longer connected to each other anymore. He hoped, by some miracle, that maybe it would've reconnected after he and Bokuto fixed things up together.

_I guess there are just some things you can't fix after you break them,_ Akaashi thought.

Bokuto wiggled his pinky, watching his red string dance in the air.

"We might not be soulmates anymore, but—" Bokuto still smiled, wrapping his own pinky around Akaashi's, and their two red strings dangling around each other.

"We can be our each other's fates now!"

Akaashi tightened the little grip around Bokuto's pinky, and somehow, they ended up interlacing their fingers together once again. Bokuto chuckled, leaving a small kiss on top of both their pinkies.

"You know, you never returned my jacket." Bokuto leaned against Akaashi's side, pulling at the hem of his jacket teasingly. Akaashi hid his nose under the burgundy scarf he wore, tugging the jacket closer to his body.

"You're never going to get it back," He muttered into the scarf as he hid the blush creeping on his cheeks, "I'm keeping it as a souvenir from when we first met."

Akaashi felt Bokuto flinch under his response. He look over to him with a questioning look on his face, feeling a rise of suspicion from his reaction.

"Yeah...about that..." Bokuto rubbed the back of his neck nervously, puffing up his cheeks, "We actually met way before I ran into you in the park."

"What?"

Akaashi sat up, his eyebrows burrowed into a confused expression. He watched as Bokuto fidgeted in his seat, tensing up under the other's gaze.

"Remember that time last year..."

"High school?"

"Last year..." Bokuto continued, fiddling with the sleeves of his hoodie. "When you dropped a bucket of paint all over yourself..."

Akaashi narrowed his eyes, vaguely recalling that shed of memory from the back of his mind. "Paint..."

Something inside him clicked, and the image of feeling red paint dripping down his body appeared in an instant.

"That was YOU?!"

Akaashi stood up abruptly, his face quickly changing under the initial shock of this realization. Bokuto shrinked back in his seat, looking off somewhere to avoid eye contact with him.

"Yeah, I—OW!"

Bokuto rubbed the spot on his head where Akaashi smacked. It wasn't hard enough to physically hurt him, but it was just enough for Akaashi to knock some sense into that thick skull of his.

"That was for that time!" Akaashi pouted his lips at him, "You know how long it took to get all that paint off in a _classroom sink??"_

"Listen—!"

Akaashi felt a shiver down his spine. "I can still feel where the paint dried in my—my—!"

"Akaashi!"

Bokuto rose up, grabbing Akaashi by his scarf and cutting him off with a kiss on his lips.

_I will never get used to this._ Akaashi relaxed in the warmth that Bokuto gave. His scent, the soothing feeling of comfort in his chest, the sounds of his heart beating just as fast as Bokuto's—

Akaashi took all of it in, accepting it for what it's worth.

When they pulled away, Bokuto gave him a goofy smile. "I don't regret it though."

"No regrets?"

"Just love!" Bokuto laughed, nuzzling against Akaashi's hair. "Now that I have you."

"Bokuto—"

"I mean it!"

Bokuto pulled himself back to look at the other with a serious look in his eyes. "I'm not letting you get away from me ever again!"

Akaashi tried so hard to fight back a smile, but to no avail. He met Bokuto's eyes with a soft gaze, "And how are you planning to do that?"

"I'll shout it so everyone can hear!" Bokuto threw his hands in the air, spinning around until he reached the ledge of the roof. Akaashi watched him, laughing, as Bokuto kept his arms in the air, counting the stars that scattered in the night sky.

"I'll tell it to the world!" He shouted, shouted out loud enough to hear his echoes.

Akaashi chuckled lightly, staring at the back of the man who means so much to him. "Tell what?"

Bokuto looked over his shoulder with a small smirk on his lips. He turned around, walking up to Akaashi slowly. Akaashi stiffened when he realized how close Bokuto came to him in just seconds, his heart stopping at the way the light of the moon just somehow made Bokuto...glow.

"I love you, Keiji." He whispered.

Akaashi never knew that there would be a day that he would hear those words that he's heard multiple times from other people say to each other, be said to him.

Yet, here he was.

Bokuto stared at him, his golden eyes fondly holding Akaashi's in his gaze. A smile never left his face, almost as if he was confident in Akaashi's response.

"I love you too," Akaashi whispered back, with no hesitation. He felt the corners of his mouth turn into a smile, no use fighting it now.

"Koutarou."

It looked like Bokuto couldn't hold it in either, and didn't stop himself from attacking Akaashi in a tight hold.

"Akaashi!!" Bokuto cried out happily as if he was waiting his whole life to hear those simple three words. He buried his head into Akaashi's shoulders, laughing against the fabric of his scarf. 

Akaashi couldn't help himself but to smile, combing his hand through Bokuto's hair comfortingly.

"Let's go back inside," Akaashi grabbed onto Bokuto's hand, walking backwards to the entrance of the roof from where they came from.

"I want to watch _Elf."_

Bokuto giggled at Akaashi's request, squeezing his hand right back. "Again?"

"Yeah," Akaashi smiled. "And then ten more times."

"Alright," Bokuto laughed, pressing his lips against Akaashi's temples.

"As many times as you want."

_I'll find my way to fall for you._

**Author's Note:**

> woah...you made it until the end???
> 
> i dunno what you think of it, but it really means a lot how much you actually stayed til the end, MMWUAHH!! i might not be a good writer, but i had so much fun writing this one !
> 
> i'm planning on writing more fics in the future too, but until then, come chill with me on tiktok @ sunibaae !! 
> 
> anyways, LOVE YOU BOOPS !! SEE YOU IN THE NEXT FIC HEHEH ♡


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